DISCLAIMER: There are explicit scenes in this chapter. If sexual themes offend you or make you feel uncomfortable in any way, please skip all of the first perspective or the chapter in its entirety. Thank you.
I Know a Girl
When Cynthia and I returned home from our little outing, she led me into her room and told me to wait on her bed as she quickly ran downstairs into the kitchen to bring me a tub of birthday cake flavored ice cream with a spoon. Now I may have said before that Cynthia is such a horrible person, self-hatred and anger tend to mask the truth in frustration. In all honesty, this is the face of a true friend.
We sat in our pajamas all night and engorged ourselves in feelings. I told her everything, all the things I've wanted to tell her since I met her. She cried a few times too, but not because she was bitter. Much to my amazement, she took everything better than I thought she would. It was as if she had already known everything I was going to say.
"Cynthia," I said wearily, scooping a spoonful of ice cream into my mouth, "I'm just so confused. I mean, you know I care about you, but I feel like such a criminal for falling in love with someone I just met. A male, no less! Do you have any idea how wrong that is? I'm surprised you aren't more disgusted…"
Sitting adjacent to me was Cynthia, using her left arm to pull me into a side hug. "Oh sweetie, it's not wrong. It's very natural for you to be feeling this way. It's your life, you can love whomever you want. What's so bad about a man who loves another man?"
"It…it just isn't right. I've always been taught, 'find the woman of your dreams, marry a nice girl and have her be the mother of your children.' There's a standard, Cynthia. My parents wanted me to keep the family name strong. How can I do that if the woman of my dreams is a seventeen year old boy? That's another aspect in which makes this scenario wrong. I'm twenty three, Cynthia. He's not even an adult yet and I find myself dreaming about being with him. There are too many things that are wrong about this."
Cynthia made a disapproving noise and pushed me away. "It's your life, Lucian. If you're into men, then there's nothing you can do about it. There is no cure, there is no doctor you can see for being…well, gay."
I felt sick. "I am not g—"
"The second you say it only proves that you are. There's no need to be defensive about it. Okay, I can see why you'd be a little freaked out about the age difference, but you're also pretty young. He'll be hitting adulthood soon, anyways. I don't see why anything else is such a big deal."
I wanted to tell her that it was a big deal, that I have passed a threshold in which there is no return. I know I'm attracted to him romantically. I know that my body temperature rises whenever I think of him. I know those thoughts border on inappropriate from time to time. I know I enjoy it. I just don't want to hear it. I don't want to accept it. I honestly believe that overdosing or hanging myself would be better than having to admit that I am in love with a boy. But instead of saying this, I simply bit down hard on my spoon.
"…You want to say something." She stated, staring me dead in the eyes. "Say it. You've already dropped the biggest bombshell you could on the both of us, so whatever you have to say will not faze me one bit."
I slowly pulled the spoon from my lips, averting her stare and thinking hard about my response. Should I tell her? I trust her enough to not completely explode if I do. I might as well since I literally have nothing else to lose.
"…I kissed him this morning."
She coughed. "You what?"
"I kissed him. He was consoling me because I had a bad morning, so I just kind of grabbed him and gave him a kiss."
"You…you mean like a little peck on the lips or…?"
"I pulled him down so to where he was on top of me and kissed him in heated passion. It was a very long kiss. I gave him lots of tongue, too."
Cynthia starting choking on probably her own saliva and I had to pat her back a few times. "You mean to tell me that you had a hot make-out with your crush and you still refuse to believe you're gay?! What were you thinking?! Did he respond? What happened?"
"I was thinking that it was the best feeling in the world and I was just so hot for him, I wanted to rip off all of his clothes with my teeth and fuck him raw right there on the table. Pardon my language."
"Oh, is that not enough for you? Well here, let me give you one better: while we were kissing passionately practically on the kitchen table, we started fondling each other. From fondling came something a little bit more. Aaron gave me a hand-job. He gave me a hot, fast hand-job like a pro in the kitchen while everyone was asleep. It felt so good. I was in such a state of ecstasy I 'accidentally' released my genetic material all over his hand. It was deliciously kinky and he even offered to continue on top of the table. I was going to tell him yes. I was going to ravage his body and lick maple syrup and butter off of his young, hot chest to overcompensate for the breakfast I didn't have."
"You're the one who wanted to truth! His hands were places that only in my dreams they would be exploring. You do not understand the magnitude of sexual tension we have had for the past three months, sweetheart. Do you know how long I have been waiting for that boy to press his body against mine in the heat of passion? Do you know how badly I have wanted him, how hot it gets under my clothes when he calls me by my name? Did you know that Aaron felt the same way for me felt and was just pissing himself in excitement when I finally had the guts to kiss him?! I love that boy more than I could possibly say, and the one moment I have to tell him how I feel, I ruin it all by once more denying my feelings and told him to his face that the kiss meant nothing, that the sexual encounter was just casual. I hurt his feelings and he told me off, screaming that I was a pathetic waste of space who can't do anything right! I blew it, Cynthia. There is no going back to him and telling him that I really love him. I'm a failure and the only person who truly mattered is now gone from my life."
I was hugging my knees to my chest, whining like a child. I'm so pathetic it hurts.
"Lucian…" She scooted next to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. "It's okay. It's going to be okay. Let it all out, honey. You are not a failure, you are not a pathetic waste of space. You've just been sucked into a world of emotion in which you don't know how to deal with. Calm down."
To the best of my ability, I calmed. She gave me the most reassuring smile.
"I—I want to tell him how I feel. I just don't know how I should bring it up. What if he's still mad at me, Cyn? How do I know if he still likes me? I don't want to mess this up any more than what it already is."
"You won't mess anything up, Ian. Trust me. I say give him the rest of tonight and sometime tomorrow when you do see him, and make sure you're alone, pull him aside and no matter what, keep him there until you're done talking. After that, then it's up to him whether he wants to continue seeing you. I know in my heart that he will forgive you, because that's what true love is. It's forgiveness. I forgive you for every little mistake you make. You forgive me more than you should. If he really loves you, which I know you know he does, he would accept your apology wholeheartedly, and if not, then he isn't worth your time, you can find better men if you and Aaron don't work out."
She stopped for a second and snapped her fingers as to indicate a final thought. "And I know that he's a hotheaded little boy. He'll snap at any little thing. If he tries to pick a fight with you, you fight back and keep at it until you get him to shut up and listen."
I wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into a hug. It felt good holding Cynthia, how warm and comforting she is.
"Thank you for the advice, but what about you, Cyn? If Aaron and I don't work out, where does that leave you?"
"Oh, don't worry about me, honey." She chuckled into my ear. "I'll be fine. I'll find love, too someday. For now, I just want you to go after the boy you truly care for."
"Cynthia, you are literally the best person I know. I love you so much." Our arms tightened their holds and for the first time in a long time, all was right in the world. Who would've thought that ending my relationship would lead to a better one?
"I love you too, Ian. Now get some rest, it's been a long day for all of us. Tomorrow you will talk to Aaron and things should get settled."
This would be the last night I would spend with Cynthia. I left to my room and slept very peacefully, not at all feeling alone.
Being an Asshole has Left Me in Despair
I don't want to miss him. No, no, no, I don't want to miss him. This is the first morning I've gone without him. I always make him breakfast and we talk about random shit, but we can't. We probably never will. God, I miss him so much. I feel like such a dickwad for yelling at him. I hurt his feelings and he probably hates me now. I didn't mean a word of it, I swear! I love him! I still love him even after he told me I meant nothing to him.
I wish I never kissed back. I wish it didn't lead to something more. I'm such a dumbass. I'm sorry, Lucian. I never meant for any of this to happen. But there's no going back now; I just have to suck it up, pretend like it never happened, and move on with my life by avoiding him until the day I die.
It's six in the morning. It'll be an entire hour before Lucian comes down for breakfast. I just want to eat alone and then I'll be out of everybody's way the rest of today. Waffles don't taste as good without him here. But I can't think like that anymore. It's time to grow up, Aaron; you didn't have a chance with him to begin with. Move on, there are other guys.
Yeah, but none of them are Lucian.
I hate him for being so perfect.
I hate these waffles. These waffles taste like resentment.
I hate myself for waking up an hour early just so I can avoid some douchebag that I'm still in love with.
I hate the fact that somewhere out there, there's a happy couple, kissing, hugging, being all fucking disgusting and cute when I'm just here lusting over someone who hates me.
I hate happiness. I want to take all of the world's happiness and set it on fire then hand out false hope to everyone just so that I won't be the only person on this earth who is that miserable.
You know, I don't even care how insensitive that sounds. Misery loves company, you know. Everyone who has done absolutely nothing to deserve tragedy should all suffer volumes of agony in its purest form just so that I won't be alone. Let every living being on this planet with hearts full of sunshine and rainbows find out that they have some kind of horrible, incurable disease and they have infected everyone around them, because that would amuse me for a few seconds and distract me from the heartbreak I am going through.
I've never been in love with anyone. I think I had a crush on this one guy in middle school, but that came and passed quickly. I've always been aware that I'm attracted to guys, which in itself shouldn't be a surprise. Well, for the most part, if you save for those girls in the ninth grade who had huge crushes on me but didn't get the hint. I figured since a girl never made me feel that way, I didn't like them. I kinda never thought about it after that, but then I was asked one day by a friend, "Since I've never seen you date anyone, what do you want in a girl that isn't apparent in the girls at school?" Of course, he wasn't that articulate (probably didn't even know what 'articulate' meant) but I took a second to think. Every time I tried thinking of a girl, she wound up with broad shoulders, a flat chest, defined face, and huge bulge in her pants. So obviously I wasn't thinking of my dream girl, but I did manage to create my expectations for my dream guy.
And my expectations are just too unreasonable. My type of guy: older, taller, well-dressed, refined, smart and crazily sexy, yet sophisticated as Hell. You know who's older than me, taller than me, well-dressed, refined, smart, and crazily sexy yet sophisticated as Hell? The asshole I fell in love with. People like Lucian aren't supposed to exist: the people who are too perfect. There's no such thing as meeting the perfect description of your dream lover and not expecting a catch. Taken, heterosexual, homosexual, they have a lazy eye, they have a club foot, they're whores, they're just not into you.
Lucian's not into me.
Let it be known at that moment, I had entered the tenth level of Hell, the special level where I go mad and hear nothing but Lucian's voice in my head forever. I just kept my head down and shoved a whole, folded waffle into my mouth, trying to pretend like the voice wasn't there.
"…Okay, then…" I hear in a quieter, disappointed tone. Just to make sure I wasn't dead and really in Lucian Hell, I looked up and saw my crush standing with his back towards me, pajama-clad and making morning tea. I guess I was so caught up in moping over him, I didn't notice when he got there.
What do I say to him? It's obviously too late to say "good morning" back, I mean, you just don't do that. So I went with the next best thing: I ignored him more in the hopes that he would forget I existed. It actually felt like it was working, because he didn't say a word to me—he didn't even turn back—during the time it took to make his tea and pour it into a red mug.
"So why're you so quiet?" He said (aw shit, I was so close to being forever invisible), sipping his tea with his back still toward me. I had three options: one, keep ignoring him because it's a pretty plausible idea; two, be a big boy and answer him kindly because he's still a human, and pretend like the conversation will carry on normally; or three…
"What, just because you never shut up means I have to keep talking, too? I happen to like silence sometimes. Get off my back."
Shit. Option number three is preprogrammed in my stupid head.
I felt bad the second I said it. This could've been my chance to mend what had happened, but as always, I decided that being an asshole to him would work just as nicely. I heard a soft "hmph" come from Lucian.
"Sorry my voice offends you so much. I didn't think you would be so touchy about a simple question. Then again, you're always mad about some trivial little thing." His voice was bitter and harsh, which made me feel even worse, but there's just something about me that refuses to let up the asshole act.
"Well maybe if stupid people like you weren't constantly plaguing my life with bullshit, I'd have a reason to be fuckin' Mary Sunshine every day." I need to stop this now before it gets out of hand. I'm already being impossible and I'm sure Lucian can fight back just as badly. Why is it so hard to let go—
"Perhaps if you got over yourself and saw that you're not the high and mighty little brat you think you are, then perhaps you'd see that not everyone is stupid, we just think differently."
His comebacks are really starting to get to me, not because I see it as him challenging my person, but because I don't want to fight with him. He's a lot smarter than I am and he could beat me at this easily. I know I'm going to wind up enraged at this and I should just get up and walk away.
"Your way of thinking is stupid. You're a stupid jackass who thinks on impulse and doesn't think about consequences. You ruin everything and all because you're a curious fuckhead." I got up from my seat and pushed my plate of waffles away. My appetite is ruined.
"Oh, so you're mad about that?"
My blood boiled over. Okay, now I'm pissed.
I stormed right up to his cocky ass and grabbed his arm, turning him around. I raised my right arm and smacked the mug from his hands, sending it crashing down to the floor. Lucian looked totally unfazed and it messed with me so badly.
"What the fuck do you mean, 'oh you're mad about that'?! Listen, you conceited, corn-fed, yellow-toothed prick, you think it's funny messing with someone's feelings? You're the one who made out with me! You have the balls to pretend like it's nothing?!" I screamed at him.
"You're the one who let it escalade, since it was your hand down my pants. So perhaps, just perhaps, I'm not the one entirely at fault here. And, I never said that it was nothing. I'm not trying to mess with anyone. My, my, you're blowing things way out of proportion, Aaron. Maybe we should talk." He said it so calmly oh my God. He gave me a shit-eating grin that almost made me pop a blood vessel. I want to kill this guy.
"Like Hell I wanna talk to you. You're an asshole. You think you're so much smarter than me." I took in a deep breath. "Just leave me alone."
"You were the one to come up to me. Before that, you were the one to respond to my question when you could've just as easily ignored me." Damn it, I regret not choosing option one. "…Ah, speechless for once? No snappy retaliation?"
"I'm serious, if you pick on me one more time…"
"Oh, so I'm picking on you? Ah, I guess I'm just supposed to sit down and cry every time you call me a bad name. I'm supposed to quiver in fear because you're a twelve year old that gets all giddy whenever he drops the 'f' bomb. You know, swearing is an uneducated, ugly way of getting your point across. It doesn't make you sound like an adult, it makes you sound neanderthalic and rude."
"You know what, fu…Forget you. I don't want to deal with this right now." I hate it when he does that. He always wins and I'm here left looking like a dumbass. I shut up and looked down, not a thing to say more.
"Hurts, doesn't it, being called names and having flaws pointed out to you all the time?" He pushed up his glasses and frowned. Boy, Lucian sure does know how to make someone feel small. "Well? Have you decided to ignore me like the child you are, or are you going to talk to me like your equal?"
"I don't want to talk to you."
"But I do."
"What makes you think you're going to get me to say anything to you?!"
"Because I know that you're in love with me and this is the only chance you're getting to make amends before it's too late." His tone changed from cold and conceited to calm and soft.
I felt my eyes widen and heart drop. "…I…I don't…"
"Aaron," he said as if I were testing his patience. I stopped and clenched my fists. "Now that I've got your attention, I feel as if we need to talk about what happened."
Speak Persuasively and Carry a Steady Conversation
He just stared at me in some vacant sort of disbelief. I probably should've waited to say that, but I'm tired of beating around the bush. I've been circling around this subject with him for months and it's about time we get to the point.
"Aaron," I said, "If you're wondering how I know, well, you made it pretty obvious with all the things you said, and the second you kissed back was pretty much a solid confirmation of the matter." He backed away from me and his eyes shifted to the door leading out the kitchen. "Don't run away from this."
"I'm not." He said sternly, backing all the way to the table. He sat atop of it, kicking his feet nonchalantly. "Okay, you know that I have feelings for you, so what? Want me to come right out and say it? Fine. I was in love with you, but then you made it pretty clear that you don't feel the same way. There, we talked about it, are you satisfied?"
I frowned and rolled my eyes. "That's not—ugh. No." I began to rub my temples. "Aaron, that's not what I was going to say. I know you had feelings for me, but what I told you yesterday was just me denying that I've been just as longing."
"So, is this now becoming some cliché where you realize your love for me and then everything ends happily?" He sneered. Well, I tried.
"That was half the expectation. The other half was expecting you to not feel the same anymore." I sighed. "I didn't want to think that I was falling for a boy. I had Cynthia, but I never really felt the same rush of joy when I'm around you. You're hilarious and intelligent and we understand each other, and all along you've been my missing puzzle piece. But then I got curious and kissed you. I kissed you to see if you really did like me or if I was just assuming that because you were so friendly with me…"
Oh, what's the point? It's obvious this little cynic doesn't want to hear it. At least I told him I liked him, too.
"…Well, I guess that's that." I have no idea what to say next. How does this work, I wonder. Do we just ignore each other and go about our lives like nothing ever happened? This is so conflicting. I looked to my side and saw the broken mug. "…I should get that."
As I got down on my knees and started to slowly pick up the fragments of mug, I couldn't help but to feel the weight of the world off my shoulders, yet have an empty pit in my stomach.
I'm a Sucker for Happy Endings
This was the best day of my life. Lucian just confessed to me. I literally want to get up from the table and kiss him all over, screaming to the world that I love him. But I think I'll hold off on that because his turmoil is really cute—now he gets to feel what I've been wondering for months.
I watched him grab the broken mug and cup the pieces in his hand, bringing himself up and wrapping it in a paper towel. Lucian looked so sad, as if someone ran over his Eevee—twice. He's so sweet and I am such a jerk for not letting him know that everything's going to be okay. I'll bet he tried convincing himself forever to just confess to me and I don't think I could've asked for anything better. Yeah, it bothered me that I didn't even get to confess to him formally, but in a way he deserves this treatment.
I do it out of love.
But now I wonder, what do you say to someone who just poured their heart out to you, that they've been in love with you for almost as long as you've with them? I have the option of taking the romantic approach, getting up and taking him in my arms, whisking him away off into the sunset. I also have the option of just stopping him and telling him that I love him, too, that we should just forget about our fight and finally start dating.
And then I could do this.
"That's nice." I said plainly, shrugging my shoulders and giving him an indifferent look. Lucian stopped wrapping up the mug and tensed, straightening his stance.
"I said 'that's nice.'" He turned to me and I'll tell ya, if looks could kill.
"I…spend days contemplating my sexuality, ruined the relationship I had with a girlfriend of five years, was on the brink of jumping out of a window to avoid confessing, took months of your bullshit and for what? For you to respond to my heartfelt confession, which, by the way, I was killing myself over just trying to string the right words together, 'that's nice?!' Heh heh, you've got a lot of nerve, Aaron. You know, in retrospect, I don't even know what I saw in you." He huffed, marching to the table and hovering over me, trying to look intimidating.
I laughed. "Why are you so pissed? You look hilarious."
He scowled and made a low, tracheal noise. "You are so immature."
"You're the one arguing with a teenager."
"You could've just been a little bit more considerate, you know."
"Well, I did say it was nice."
I smiled widely at Lucian's frustration. "Now you know how I feel." He scoffed and rolled his eyes. "You're really cute when you're angry."
"You're a little shit." He hissed.
"Ah-ah, language, Mister." I wagged my finger at him, tapping him on the nose once. "Your mouth is too pretty to be tainted by bad words."
Lucian quirked a brow and swiped my hand away. "Oh, so now you think you can make things better by flirting?"
"You don't mind it. I know you don't." I reached up and ran my hand through his pretty lavender hair. "You wouldn't stay mad at me, would you? I mean look at me. I'm fucking cute."
Lucian glared at me, but then he just sighed and closed his eyes. "So you were just playing around, I see."
"Of course I was. Your confession made me feel like I could explode from happiness. I'm still totally in love with you, Lucian. I just wanted to fuck around because it's what I do." I gave him a reassuring smile and pulled him down to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "And trust me, now that I know that you're into me and you're single, I'm going to take advantage of you in any way possible."
Lucian chuckled and placed his hands on the edges of the table. "Not before I do you."
"Whoa-ho-ho, getting a little feisty there, Lucian. " We both laughed, but then an ingenious thought came to my perverse teenage mind. "…Hey Lucian…"
He hummed and smirked slightly. "Yes, Aaron?"
"Not to sound like a bitch, but I recall yesterday you interrupted our fun with your stupid words. I thought, had you not said anything, we were going to…" I trailed off, trying not to sound like I was eager about anything. After giving me an estranged look, Lucian raised his eyebrows and had an 'oh-I-know-where-this-is-going' expression on his face.
"Continue where we left off?" He looked around, then back at me. "And as I recall, you offered to finish right here on the table."
"Mmhm…Not that I'm saying anything, but I was just wondering if maybe…since a good ninety-nine percent of the duration of our friendship has been nothing but denying our sexual tension for one another, I figure we'd stop circling around the subject and kind of—"
"Get it over with because it is, in essence, what we've really been wanting for the better part of four months?" He completed my sentence and stared into my eyes intensely.
"..Yeah…" I stared back and for a moment, things got real quiet. You could cut this tension with a knife. Now that it's out in the open—
"Oh God, get the fuck over here—" I grabbed Lucian's satin button-up shirt and pulled him against me, kissing him like I've never kissed anyone before. Almost instantly he grabbed my shoulders and pushed me down on the table, pressing his lips back feverishly against mine. The power of blind lust took over and from there things finally escalated to where we've wanted.
I curled my fingers into his shirt and kept kissing him messily. Lucian bit my lower lip (and it hurt like a bitch) and ran his tongue against my teeth. Without hesitation I opened my mouth and took his tongue in, swirling mine against it wildly and without any real direction. Although Lucian tried to stably circle his tongue around mine, he eventually gave up and just acted on his own accord.
"Oh God, this is what I've been waiting for…" He purred, leaving my lips (much to my dismay) and trailing kisses against my jawline, down my neck, and stopped at my collarbone, where he nibbled gently. It sort of tickled and I made a little noise indicating approval.
"You have the most delicious set of collarbones I've ever seen on a person." At that moment I thanked my friend for sending me this vest which showed off what Lucian wanted to see. He ran his tongue along the crevices of my clavicle, giving me goose bumps. Soon these horrible, strained noises came from the back of my throat. Lucian momentarily stopped his licking and grabbed the zipper to my vest with his teeth, his bespectacled eyes looking into mine as he unzipped.
"Lucian…" I whined, completely aroused by his actions. Just the thought of him ravaging every inch of my body was enough to drive me insane, but actually feeling him like this is just… "Lucian!"
Caught completely off-guard (thanks to being lost in thought again), I found Lucian and his skillful tongue back at my collar, his hands slipping my vest off. I helped and slid out of it swiftly. My masterful superior ran his smooth, nimble fingers against the curve of my waist and brought them up to my chest, where a single pale pointer drew little circles around my nipple. His free hand traveled along my lower abdomen, tracing his hands around and finding sensitive spots that I didn't even know existed. I tightened my grip on his night shirt, and although the lush feeling of the material felt nice on my bare skin, I wanted it off.
"You're so eager." Lucian chuckled, taking the hint and stopping his touches. He stood and unbuttoned his shirt too slowly for his own good. He saw my blatant frustration and smirked—fuck, that smirk makes me crazy—peeling his shirt off and tossing it on a chair. Exquisite pale skin doesn't even begin to describe that man's appeal.
"You can stop the show, geez. What ever happened to 'just fuck me already?'" I managed to squeak, earning an electrifying set of fingers rubbing against my inner thigh. I shivered and exhaled.
"Mm, what's the fun in that? Surely I want you, but there's just so much I want to do first. You've a lot to learn, my darling." Suddenly his voice dropped to this whisper and fuck what a difference it made. As if I weren't already seduced by him, he decides to talk like that.
Not hearing any further objections from me, Lucian lowered himself to my chest, giving me a few kisses before venturing over my skin and flicking his tongue over my right nipple. "Nn…" I got chills from his teasing. Sadly he hardly gave the bud the attention it deserved, but Lucian knew what he was doing. He nibbled a little sporadic trail down to my naval (biting seems to be his thing, which is a great turn-on for some reason), where he dipped his tongue into my bellybutton maybe twice. A light giggle escaped me because it tickled a lot, but I really didn't want to ruin the mood. My well-educated companion abandoned my body to push his glasses up, eyeing my pants.
"Don't worry, my antsy little love, you'll be getting a special treat for all your waiting." Lucian said in that hot whisper. He folded his fingers over the zipper and button to my pants, undoing everything, purposely rubbing his thumbs against my growing hard-on. I whimpered and bit down on my lip to stay quiet, which wouldn't last long with Lucian pulling my pants off. Down to the floor they went, and he stared at me for a bit, the look of pure, unwavering lust riddled in his toothy grin. He grabbed the waistband of my boxers and tugged them down, my cock springing out startlingly. "My, my, you're a lovely little slender thing." He licked his lips and stroked my erection with the cold tips of his fingers. "I'm salivating just looking at it."
I felt my face heat up and I made a few whiny noises. "Lucian, stop it…" When had I become so submissive?
"Mm, I see, you want direct entertainment." He dipped his head lower, pressing his lips against my left thigh. He yet again found a sweet spot in a place I never would've thought.
"Nnff Lucian, no…" I tried to stop his teasing, but every time a new little moan of delight that betrayed my needs came out of my mouth, Lucian kept kissing my thighs, licking and biting softly. I scratched against the table, desperate for him to just do what he's going to. "Please, Lucian, please!"
Lucian hummed in satisfaction and brought his head back up. "You're so needy. I like this part of you." That stupid cocky asshole. But I could no longer complain, since he was giving me all I wanted, starting with a kiss to the tip of my cock. He smiled and dragged his talented tongue against its length, making me squirm. A few moans left me, and my tense nature seemed to fade away under the ministrations of Lucian's lips, which were now enveloped over the head. I clenched my eyes shut and bit down on my lip hard.
"Mmmnnn Lucian...Oh Lucian…" That name will forever be rolling off the tip of my tongue after today. My remarkable companion suckled on me; I felt more of the inside of his hot mouth with every few sucks, I felt his head bob dutifully on my length. "Ohh fuck…" I moan under my breath, the urge to roll my hips against him getting too great for me to control. I bucked my hips once, receiving an inviting "mmm" from Lucian. I pumped again a few more times, trying to get him to suck me as fast and hard as he can. Suddenly I felt his hands on my hips, holding me down, stabilizing my thrusts as he bobbed his head up and down faster, satisfying my need. He moaned against my cock and those few seconds of hard sucking made me grab his hair and mimic his movements.
"Oh my—Lucian, Lucian, I'm—h-…O-oh f…!" I tried to tell him I was going to cum, but I couldn't think; the intensity of orgasm broke my train of thought and the sentence became a mumble, forming into a short, high-pitched yelp. My back arched and I released a few spurts into Lucian's mouth. I panted a little, and I felt him swallow before popping off. He gave me the most mischievous, sexy smile, as if he'd accomplished something so fucking great—
He did more than that.
"Your self-control is fun to play with. The results are pleasing, to say the least." Lucian said in a sultry purr, standing back up and scanning his half-lidded violet eyes over me.
"You're horrible, Lucian…" I looked up at him, dazed by the mind-blowing experience. "But I admit…playing with you is better than I imagined…"
Lucian kept his eyes on me as he hooked his fingers into his pants. "Consider it payback for yesterday. But now…" He began to pull down his pants and I watched him, my body freezing. I'm eagerly awaiting the reveal. Lucian brought his pants down just below his rear, his long, quivering cock standing readily. My eyes widened at the sight of him—I want—need him in me now.
"Lucian, please, please, please. I need it now!" I begged, shakily parting my legs. He adjusted his glasses and used his other hand to grab my knee, pushing my leg further out.
He positioned himself in between my legs, grabbing onto his length and prodding my hole with the tip. A sharp shock shot up my spine and I stifled a moan. I took in a long breath and closed my eyes, mentally prepping myself for what's to come.
"Aaron…" I heard Lucian groan as he pushed himself inside of me, my eyes popping open. I scratched at the table even more and whimpered at the feeling of being ripped apart.
"N-nn! H..A-aah! Lucian!" I screamed, curling my toes and breathing in as fast as possible.
He pressed a finger to my lips and shushed me. Lucian entered more of his length inside and he felt huge. It hurt so much and my mouth was dry from all the panting and yelling, but I want this more than I want air. He's going to break me, I can feel it. Every sense I have intensified when Lucian was completely in, taking me, surprising me with his first thrust.
Lucian's smile slowly left him and all that remained was a flurry of eyelashes, his lips parted a bit to where only the bottom of his two front teeth were showing. A thin layer of sweat started forming over him, me glistening with sweat by that point, and he gave me another shallow thrust. His hips rocked against mine at a slow, steady pace and everything felt so tight. I moaned his name over and over, the only thing in my head being how good Lucian is going to make me feel and how satisfied he is by being my first.
I grabbed his shoulders and clawed into his back, getting tired of his slow pumps. "Lucian…"
He leaned over and closed in against my ear. "Say it and you'll get it." He said in a harsh whisper that made me squeak.
"I want more."
Lucian moaned softly and picked up the pace, pressing against me further until out bodies melted against one another, molding as if they were made to do this. He was so close to me, close enough to where I could smell the intoxicating scent of his hair. Every sense that appealed to me in ways I could never imagine. The taste of his hot, salty skin I've bit into as he fucked me, the scent of his morning-showered body now masked with sweat and sex, the sight of him being enraptured by me, the look of desire burning in his violet eyes, the feeling of him thrusting in and out of me with such passion, the way he grabbed onto my leg and angled himself inside of me, making me scream his name. His fuck became harder, and I threw my head back and rolled my hips against his, meeting him move by move. Lucian's voice was enthralled, enthusiastic—he moaned in longing desperation my name, he cursed with his breath on occasion. I had ripples sent through all over my body, and eventually the two of us became so sweaty that every time I tried to dig my nails into him they just glided off.
Our cries were heated and were growing to new heights of ecstasy. Lucian grabbed my ass with one hand and curled his fingers, his nails clawing into my skin. I'm so close, I'm so fucking close. I looked up at my lover and whimpered amidst our cries, trying to tell him I was ready. His eyes met mine and the message was clear. Just as I was peaking, Lucian clung to my skin harder and pounded me faster, I arched again and screamed his name over and over, "Lucian! Oh, fuck, Lucian! I'm cumming! Aaah!"
I grabbed the back of his head and yelled his name once more as I came, shooting my white hot load all over his abdomen. I was so spent, but Lucian wasn't about to let up just because I was done. I kept my grip on him and let my moans flow from my dry, sore throat as he fucked me harder than before, looking into my eyes as he felt himself come to orgasm as well.
"A…Aaron!" He exhaled, pulling me into a deep kiss as he came inside of me. I squealed in pleasure and wrapped my legs around his waist, not letting go until he was finished. Our kiss lasted a good while, then I felt him pull out of me. We broke the kiss and our eyes locked onto each other.
"Lucian…" I whispered, spent and tired. "You…I…" I couldn't even think straight.
He gave me another kiss, this one soft and sweet, then mumbled against my lips. "I love you."
If that's what he said, then I must've said "I love you too" back. If not, then I thought it. Either way, it was true. Nothing quite says "be my boyfriend" than four months of sexual tension finally pushing us to our breaking point.
"…Are you two quite finished?"
And there goes our romantic air. Lucian and I pulled away and looked to where the voice came from. Standing in the doorway was Cynthia, looking annoyed and tired. Behind her were Flint, who was nodding in approval, and Bertha, who shook her head and began to walk away.
I died inside.
"…Well. This was an unexpected turn of events." Lucian said, reaching down to pull up his pants. I scrambled to get off the table, trying too hard to find my underwear which magically disappeared during this time alone.
Cynthia hit her face with her palm. "Aaron, please! I don't want to see your gizmo!" Flint snickered in the background. "You two, I'm happy that you've resolved your issue, but did it have to be on our table? We eat there! We were going to eat some lunch!" She scolded, turning on her heel and heading for the door. "Get dressed and go eat lunch by yourselves! You've ruined our appetites! Flint, get back here!"
And with that, the two were out. I managed to find my boxers finally and put on my clothes quickly. Lucian sighed and looked at me.
"Sorry about that." He smiled, buttoning his shirt back on. I slipped on my vest and laughed.
"Don't be. It was amazing. From now on, let's keep it away from the kitchen. Maybe move it to the library or the coffee room or the roof." I said, Lucian chuckling and pulling me in for a hug. Mmm, he was so warm and wonderful. And sweaty.
"Perhaps somewhere more private would suffice." I looked up and him and tiptoed, kissing him.
"…Wanna go for round two in my room?"
"You've got it."
We chased each other back upstairs. Safe to say we're official now, but I'll go into detail after I have some alone time.
First off, I'd like to thank my beautiful and loyal artistic love-buddy Miss Lazlo, who drove me to finish this. Nothing wrong with a little bribery –wink-
This has been an amazing experience for all of us, more so me because I spent so long writing it. I didn't know how this was going to end, really, but I do think that this was a great penultimate chapter, no? It's been forever since I've written so much. Thank you, my beautiful readers! There is ONE MORE chapter after this one, so stay tuned! I hope you enjoyed this delicious Eliteunder goodness as much as I did! Don't forget to review, my loves! (If there are concerns, please message me, my loves)