Author's Note: Kay, so this fic has passed 2,000 views. All I can say is Thank You. For real though, I never expected people to like it. But since you do, I'm going to continue writing it! Hope you enjoy!
Author's Note #2: I'm going to be switching back and forth from Willow's POV to Buffy's. I'll indicate when the POV changes.
Chapter Eleven: Saying Goodbye (Part One)
I don't get it. Why would she just leave like that after telling me something so... Dramatic. And that's an understatement. I mean, I knew that she would be disgusted about what Faith did to me, but I didn't think that she would leave Sunnydale because of it. I can't live without her, even if she can live without me. I want to do everything in my power to make sure Buffy Summers stays in Sunnydale.
I was sitting there for about two hours when I remembered that it was a school day. I couldn't miss school. Not even under these circumstances. I wonder if Buffy'll be there. If she is then maybe I could talk to her.
'Of course I fucking know Willow! How could you do something like that to me?'
Those two sentences kept playing in my head, over and over, like a broken record. Each time it would start, my guilt got worse. I just couldn't get the look of the pure disgust on Buffy's face out of my head. She was so upset. I had made her upset. Me. Willow Rosenberg. I never wanted to make anybody upset. Let alone the woman I'm in love with. I'm in love with her.
"I'm in love with Buffy Summers!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, knowing that no-one would hear me. Then when the realization that the woman I was in love with was leaving tonight, I knew I had to do something about it.
So I got ready for school, faster than ever before, and successfully made it to the library with about fifteen minutes to spare. Of course, when I got there everyone was giving me weird looks, like I was, I don't know. Their looks were just weird.
"Hey everybody," I said as I awkwardly waved and walked over to the table.
I got a smile from both Xander and Giles, a nod and a wave from Oz, and a scowl from Buffy.
'If you didn't want to be with me, all you had to do was say so!'
That was another sentence that was going through my mind. I do want to be with her, more than she even knows. Wait. Hold up. This morning Buffy was angry, not disgusted. She said that she thought that we were going to try to work things out... I brought my hands to my lips and let silent tears fall.
"No..." I whispered, only loud enough for Buffy to hear. Apparently getting Buffy's attention also got the rest of the group's attention.
"Willow, are you alright?" Giles asked, ever so calmly. I just shook my head, still crying, but this time being more vocal about it.
"I-I can't believe, after all we-we've been though, to-together, you think I would-would do that t-to you!" I screamed at Buffy as I grabbed my book-bag off the floor and ran out of the library, to the only room I knew I could cry in without being judged – the girls bathroom.
I had been in there for three minutes when I heard the bathroom door open. I figured that it was just some girl coming in to do her make-up, until that girl knocked on the stall that I had made my crying place.
"Go a-a-away." I weakly sobbed.
"C'mon Red, you can't hide in there all day." A familiar voice said. Faith.
I had just gotten to the library when not even two minutes later, Willow comes bursting through the doors sweating and panting like it's the middle of a really hot summer. 'Probably had another quickie with Faith.' I thought to myself, while giving her a really dirty look. I think she said something, but I don't care. Everyone got back to work on whatever we were researching, when I heard almost silent sobbing, immediately I looked over to Willow.
"No..." She whispered quietly, but still loud enough for me to hear. When I fully brought my attention to the crying Redhead, everyone's attention followed mine.
"Willow, are you alright?" Giles asked, as if he had no idea what's happening, but he knows. He always knows. Willow shook her head and made her sobs turn into cries.
"I-I can't believe, after all we-we've been through, to-together, you think I would-would do that t-to you!" She yelled at me as she grabbed her bag and sprinted out of the library.
"Damn..." I said to myself, causing everyone's attention to return to me. 'Think Buffy, think. You need an explanation.' I thought to myself, "Uh, she, uh, you see, what happened was, uh..." I started then I paused to catch my train of thoughts, "I'm leaving Sunnydale tonight." I finally blurted out.
When no-one answered I broke the silence, "You know, I should probably go and find Willow..." I suggested as I was already halfway out the library doors.
'Okay, Buffy think. If you were Willow, where would you go to cry?'
"Washroom!" I whisper-shouted to myself as I started sprinting towards the washroom.
When I got there I heard talking so I figured that maybe she wasn't in there, but I looked anyways. When I opened the door I saw her locking lips with Faith!
"Are you seriously going to tell me that there's nothing going on here, Willow?!" I cried as the tears were just automatically flowing down my face. Willow looked shocked, embarrassed and scared. While Faith just looked like, well... Faith.
"Buffy I swear! Please hear me out." She tried, but I wasn't having any of it. It's not like she has the Slayer bond thing going on.
"Why should I? Huh Willow? You just giving little Faithy a goodbye present?" I quipped with tears still flooding my face.
"Buffy no, it's not like that!" She tried again, but I still wouldn't let her continue.
"Bullshit!" I said with my voice cracking from crying.
"Well, this looks like fun, but I got a little field trip I gots to pack for. See ya later Buff." Faith said as she winked and jumped out of the washroom window. Willow was inching closer to me, she probably thought I couldn't notice it, but I did.
"Buffy..." She said, her voice sounded hoarse and as if she were on the verge of tears, I looked up at her, silently telling her to continue, "Last night, at-at City Hall, what you think happened, didn't happen. Well, it did but it wasn't my fault, Buffy, I swear to you. I-I-I love you; I would never do that to you. Faith r-raped me! Please Buffy, please believe me." She babbled, now crying even worse than I was. I can't forgive her. Every ounce of humanity in me is screaming at me, telling me to take her in my arms and tell her that I love her too, but I can't. Not if it will cost her, and everyone else, their lives.
'Get yourself together Summers' I thought to myself.
"Willow, I'm sorry, but I could never love you again after what you did with her." I said now crying harder than Willow, but managing to hide it better, well at least until I got out of the building.
"Willow, I'm sorry, but I could never love you again after what you did with her." She said as she immediately stopped crying when she left me crying heartbroken.
I didn't know that it was possible for me to feel this terrible. I felt like someone had dug their hand into my stomach and took a part of it, then they did the same thing with the rest of my body. That was the moment I knew two things for certain.
One; Buffy was gone.
Two; I'm never going to see her again.
Both of those things sucked, but there was nothing I could do about it.
To be continued...