First Shot: Robin Feels Powerless

Note: For those of you who may be confused, this happens during the 4th season story arc, it's as if we never got the The End 3parters. Season 3 happened over the summer & season 4 was in the fall months in this fic/ universe/ whatever-you-want-to-call-it-so-it-makes-sense. That is all, carry on...

I couldn't believe it had happened. Sure, she had been the stereotyped 'Goth Titan'. Sure, she had some darker moments, but all the Titans did. Raven hated the cliché, yet she had fallen victim to the very thing she despised.

I knew Raven had been battling depression. It wasn't one of her well-kept secrets. I was surprised it was a secret at all, but, then again, Raven had been trained her whole life to never feel, never show emotion.

You hid your skeletons when I had shown you mine

After all we'd been through over the summer; I was Haunted by memories of my former foe, Starfire becoming Betrothed to that thing, when Beast Boy unleashed the Beast Within, Cyborg's Crash, when Raven was Spellbound with that dragon. Everyone had shared more with each other. Yet, even after all that, Raven still had remained a mystery, distant to us. She still had secrets to hide apparently.

You woke the devil that I thought you left behind

Raven had told me once that she wouldn't let her heritage affect her destiny, wouldn't let it decide how she lived. Yet, when Slade had come back from the dead to deliver this unholy prophecy, how Raven would unleash this unspeakable evil into the world. I had heard some of the threats her father must've been sending her through our bond

'What you have concealed you shall become.'

She hadn't gotten over the fact that she was a half-demon, and as hard as she tried to keep it from us, she simply couldn't keep it forever.

I saw the evidence, the crimson soaking through

I remembered bringing it up with her. Over the summer Raven had taken to wearing civilian clothes when she wanted to go out without being immediately recognized as a superhero. She always tried to wear something with long sleeves, like what she had for her uniform, but I still noticed. The long thin scars running down her arms, no matter how well her healing abilities worked, Raven seemed to want, maybe need, the reminders for herself. I tried to take her aside and talk with her about it, but she'd only pull away like always.

It got so bad, once, right before we left to go stop some minor villain, her leotard sleeves had been soaked through with blood. She had fought that whole battle without bringing her arms out from under her cloak.

Ten thousand promises, Ten thousand ways to lose

As a team, the Titans had been through a lot over the year. I promised Star once that we'd all be friends forever, and when she came back from that future we had lived without her, it only reinforced the idea for us all.

Sure, the villains had been getting tougher, the monsters were harder to beat, but we'd done the impossible so many times over, it was just a concept now, just like losing was for me.

"You said once, 'Winning isn't everything'" I slightly laugh into the night, trying to talk with her as I tended to do on lonely nights like these, remembering life as it had been with the dark Titan.

"But we lost you, and that was a game no one is meant to lose. Don't you get that?"

And you held it all

Raven had been our rock. The only one, besides me, who could be counted on to keep a level head in a desperate situation. She could be trusted to keep everyone safe and still kick plenty of butt herself. Raven was the cool, calm, collected one and if she had the drive, she could've beaten me out for leader. But Raven was fine with just being a part of the team.

But you were careless to let it fall

Finally telling us everything, after all we had been through over that summer, after all Slade had put her through in the past few weeks… it had finally pushed her over the edge. Raven was the most hopeful person I knew. But to know she had just... given up…

You held it all

And I was by your side

Powerless

I had known Raven for what seemed like forever. All the Titans, we were almost family. It was so unlike the distant relationship I had with Batman. And watching Raven fade away from us like that… I tried to do all I could. I made every effort to reach out to her, and yet…

I watched you fall apart and chased you to the end

To know it was all for nothing, all my effort only to have her leave us…

I'm left with emptiness that words can not defend

"I miss you," I whisper into the night. I clutch her note to me tighter, her final words to me playing over in my head. I close my eyes behind this new mask I had taken on.

I had dropped the Robin mantle after she'd left us.

Now, I'm Nightwing, and I hate it.

You'll never know what I became because of you

The Titans had split up fairly soon after she had left us. Just like with Star, we needed the whole team to function. Take one of us, the whole team falls apart.

Now I've become more like the Dark Knight than I ever wanted to. All because our team fell apart and I was left alone to defend Jump.

Ten thousand promises, Ten thousand ways to lose

Cyborg had been the first to go. Said he got a job with STAR Labs and a full ride scholarship to some university on the East Coast. He was working with Titans East now in his free time. I guess crime fighting was getting old for him.

Beast Boy became obsessed with bringing Terra back. Raven had been doing all she could and BB said she had been close to a breakthrough. I lost track of him after a while.

Starfire stayed the longest, but her unbridled joy simply wasn't enough to combat my brooding. She said that she was needed back on her planet. I haven't heard from her since.

And you held it all

But you were careless to let it fall

"I miss you," I whisper again. This time hoping somehow my friends might hear it, the silent apology in it.

I could've stopped her. I should've done more. I would've been able to make her stay.

Could've, should've, would've.

You held it all

And I was by your side

Sometimes, like on this night, I can delude myself into thinking that Raven never left. That it was the other Titans who simply disbanded, and that she's standing here, silently, by my side. That we're protecting the city, together, just the two of us. But then I open my eyes from behind this mask and I see that there's no one there, only the breeze and the sounds of late night activities.

Powerless

I've never truly had powers of my own. I had to rely on my strength, my martial arts training, my own brain. And yet, some speculated that I was the most powerful Titan, despite my lack of supernatural ability.

"But I couldn't stop my own teammate," I confess to the night.

"I've never felt so weak, so vulnerable, so defenseless, so… powerless…"

And that's because, Richard, I try to tell myself, you've fooled yourself, for so long, into thinking that you've had the power, when really, you barely have any more than the next kid. But I won't listen. Some other time, perhaps, but for now, I allow myself to be fooled, because I need to prove her wrong, I need to show her that I can't let her go, that she's still a part of me, a part of this team that we've left behind, a part of this world, a part of my world. And I won't let her go. Why can't I allow myself to finally let her go? To let this pain go?

...

Author's Note & Disclaimer: Yes, that's right, Poe here owns LP and TT! Pff, I wish. The Teen Titans are owned more/less by Cartoon Network and Warner Bros, Linkin Park owns the lyrics and stuff. Just to be clear, this first shot is for Powerless, second will be for I'll Be Gone, and the third will be Roads Untraveled, all from their recent Living Things album. Best album since Meteora, btw, I liked some songs from Minutes to Midnight, but for the most part, they kinda strayed from their usual style with MtM and A Thousand Suns... NI! They're really awesome, and if you give them a chance, you might find some songs that you'd like from them.

Apologies and Thanks to Stormy-chan, I'm sorry I made you cry, but I'm happy you liked it!

A big round of applause to Xaphrin, a writer I've really looked up to for her amazing writing skills. Thank you for looking over my work and making some suggestions on improving this, I hope that I've made my thoughts a little clearer in some places, in others... well, that was the authoress' intent? I'll use that as my excuse for now. ^^. Thanks again!

Now onto why I've posted this up instead of the second chap of my first fic on this site- grab a steaming cup of your favorite comfort beverage, kids, this story isn't for the faint of heart-... on second thought I'll have you sitting on the edge of your seat until the final shot, unless I get enough people asking me to explain sooner...

Like a wise author before me once said- It's a fanfiction crime to read and not review! So tell me how I did, how I could do better, whether you loved or hated, laughed or cried, anything at all! Tell me to get my butt into gear for the next shot or chap of my other story. Tell me I suck and I should never write again... wait, that'd be really mean... But then again, I have pretty thick skin- figuratively speaking- so whatever floats your cannoli!

Tune in soonish for the next shot! See ya then!