Disclaimer: I do not own Sons of Anarchy, never have and probably never will though I'd love to. All the characters and whatever else belong to Kurt Sutter and FX. The storyline is mine though. But I make no profit from this unless you want to count the shits and giggles I get from doing it.
A/N: I like this chapter quite a bit, thought that maybe there were some parts that could be elaborated upon. Let me know if you are interested.
Warnings:Freakish dreams...And usual SoA stuff.
Chapter 6- Dreams, Knives, and Backhands
Tig rolled over in bed, the sheets tangling up his legs as he came nose to hair with man next to him. A man? Tig jumped back, hand hitting air and tumbling backwards off the mattress. Head smacking the floor and falling onto his side. "Shit."
A groan from above, the mattress moving with the movements as a man pop up over the side of the bed staring down at Tig, a goofy grin on his face. "Holy fuck that actually happened last night!?"
"Aye it did. And. It. Was. Amazing!" Chibs hearty laugh filled the room as Tig stared stunned, goose bumps running across his skin, vaguely aware of the fact that he was, indeed, naked.
"You've got to be kidding!"
"Haha nope. Sorry Tigger guess you gotta add a man to that list of things you've fucked." Tig glared at him.
"Fuck you." He dragged himself to his feet, sheets falling around his ankles.
"Yeh already did brother." Tig threw back a glare, if looks could kill.
"I'm getting a shower." He grumbled. Chibs watched Tig walk away, his hips swinging with a swagger only Tig possessed making his ass look as cute as ever. Chibs grinned, slipping through the bathroom door ready to join Tig in the shower. Tig stopped him short.
"Fuck no man! I want to shower alone!"
"Why? You seemed okay with sharing last night." Chibs gave a wink and Tig shuddered.
"Don't even. Don't EVEN!"
"Awwww come on. Is wittle Tiggy ashamed of his wittle man? Maybe not so big in the daywight?" Tig's mouth dropped. What the fuck? He had no clue how to even react to that.
"I...you...we...wait, what?" Chibs just laughed, this was much too rich for him.
"You don't remember anything do ya? Well...first you wanted to get drunk- of course. Then there was the chick in a bunny suit who turned out to be a guy and then the corvette and dump truck, and then," Chibs had to pause to laugh, "there was that alien guy selling the hand cuffs with the antennas you know? And then there was that HUGE Judy baby doll that you just had to have, and then-"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP! Judy baby dolls? Are you kidding me there is no fucking way, abso-fucking-lutely NO way, there was ever a Judy doll!"
"Ah, ah, ah. Tiggy look here," Chibs wagged his finger in Tig's face before disappearing down the hall, leaving Tig to stumble out the shower after him, simultaneously wrapping a towel around his waist.
He found Chibs in the kitchen, and pulling out of the large full-size fridge none other than, one Judy baby doll. First came the hand, a chubby little plastic hand, then the arm, then the rest of it came tumbling out. A giant plastic, smooth doll, standing at least seven foot had just come out of a fridge.
"H-h-h-holy, f-f-f-fu-fu-fuck." Tig stuttered, fear welling up in his chest as he fell back on his ass, scurrying as far back and as fast as he could get, just as Chibs starting talking to the doll. He didn't get far though as his hand landed on something soft and squishy, glancing back he saw a hybrid creature, half-alien, half-bee; slime covered foot under Tig's hand.
He gulped. Then hands wrapped around his arms, the alien and a new arrival hoisting him up on his feet. He saw the thin fingers wrapped tight around his arm, painted nails adorning them. Reluctantly he turned his head coming face to face with the Mrs. Doubtfire.
"Sorry, he doesn't really remember last night." Chibs said to all assembled.
Then the doll cocked its head at Tig curiously and took a step towards Tig easily closing the gap between them. Tig's heart dropped to his stomach, his whole body stiffened, right now he really wished he had his gun. He tried to get away but the hold on his arms left him hopeless. The doll reached out a hand for Tig, chubby digits wiggling in want and Tig screamed...
A shrill cry filled his ears, echoing off the walls as his eyes snapped awake. He rolled off the chair and grabbed for the missing knife on the coffee table in one swift motion. He came up weaponless, staring straight at a sweaty Tig crouched and wild, knife clutched tight and angled at him. "WHERE THE FUCK IS THE DOLL?" Chibs was lost. "The doll where the fuck is it? Where? I'm gonna kill that damn thing, cut its little head off!"
"Tig what the hell are ya talking about?"
"No stay back! Where is that damn Judy doll!?"
"What the hell is going on here?"
Both their heads snapped around to see Gemma closing the front door, her face was questioning but somehow she wasn't surprised.
"Gem!?" Tig dropped the knife, straightening up. "Wait where did you come from? What about the doll? And the aliens? And Mrs. Doubtfire? And the, and the, what happened!?"
"I told you not to give him anything!" Gemma back-handed Chibs chest. He replied with a stiff 'ow'.
"I didn't! He just woke up! Screaming bout some damn doll!"
"God, shit, that was dream? Holy fuck. Good, good, Jesus Christ thank god, thank you Lord!"
"And now he's a preacher. You definitely gave him something." She shot Chibs a pointed look, smirk playing about her lips.
"I-...oh Tig." He shook his head. Walking away to the kitchen, throwing his hands up in surrender.
A/N: In reference to my note at the top I am referring to elaboration on the Tig's dream- let me know.
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