A/N: My dear readers, I wrote this to try to get back into the spirit of writing. I'm sorely lost in my mind for Catching Imprint. I have everything for it, the chapters outlined, I just cannot seem to be able to write it, and for that I am very sorry. I'm also very sorry for dragging you along on this vendetta of mine. I didn't mean to make the mistake of taking so long to actually finish the story. Lucky for you fine fellows this story, Passive Aggressive, is just a two shot. So I should have the next/ final chapter up within the week. Yes, this is full of angst, but no, the only possible lemon is cut. You can find it on AO3, there is a link on my profile. Enjoy.
She moved lightly, her body swaying and clashing with others to the beat. Her breath was harsh, her heart thumping intensely in her chest. She needed this, needed the feeling of being wanted, even if only by other bodies. She used to dream of touching, feeling the intense, yet desirable, feeling of being loved.
If her pack new where she was they would balk.
Little Bella Black, gawky teen, braces glaring, troubled soul. She was more than that, though. She wanted to be more than that.
Breathing deeply, Bella braced her palms against the body in front of her, her fingers slipping down to run along toned muscles. Hands moved against her sides, clasping and pulling. She felt breath on the side of her mouth just before another descended. They moved over her teeth, hesitating at her braces, but then dominating her, controlling her every move. She wanted this, the feel of being led, being told what to do. She wanted that, wanted the feelings. She'd been empty for so long.
Harsh hands grappled for her waist, pulling her away from the body in front of her and closer to the one behind. The motions were the same, kissing, touching, dominance at play. It was heavenly.
She could barely hear the others in her head now, their voices so distant it was like another dream, another time. She wanted to bask in this, the pack could wait.
Pulling the men along, she allowed her hands to linger on their lips, brushing lightly she crooked her finger. "This way," She murmured as her body and desire guided them towards the back rooms of the club. She wanted this now, wanted to feel them inside of her.
She tipped the guard at the door, the money more substantial then she could afford, but it was for a good cause. Entering the room she stilled, her body wanting to be commanded.
"Get on the bed," One of the men murmured. His friend must have understood, because it wasn't seconds later that he was commanding her to strip.
She complied easily, her desire for them overwhelming. This was what she wanted, but the feelings she had were wrong. She felt lonely, nauseous to the point of vomiting. She needed them to touch her, needed them to breathe her in and never let her escape. "Please…" She begged, her hands reaching out, touching flesh, grasping at the bodies. "Touch me." It was erotic.
"We will," the taller of the two spoke. His voice was like heaven, whiskey and silk combined. Bella melted her bones lush to their torturous hands.
Bella stood above the two men, their bodies placid on the bed. She didn't really want to leave, but a glance at the clock on one of the red, silken walls notified her to the time. Stumbling towards the door she shifted, her body shortening, her appearance changing to that of a wolf.
No one was here, no one would notice. Slipping through the now deserted club she rushed towards the doors, her muzzle shoving one open, her body moving outwards into the crisp Washington air.
She was basking on high. Living on the feelings she'd drained. Her breath was harsh, the voices in her head questioning.
"Where have you been?"
"You've been off grid for over six hours. Did you forget?"
She didn't answer her legs glided her over the ground, her breaths fogging the night air. She could feel them inside her, the men. Their emotions were hectic, could be catastrophic.
No one knew of her problem, the sense of preservation was more than she could stand. She would be judged, put on stand by those she knew would not understand. She wasn't meant to be portrayed as the victim, she was wolf. Driven by hunger, longed for by the Earth. She wouldn't succumb.
But her other side, her hungry side, wanted to eat still. The men hadn't been enough. Lifting her head to the sky she howled out a disparaging yowl. It was devastating and tasteless, something to be feared.
Picking up her speed she moved into the woods, her eyes focused on the rising sun line. She didn't realize she had been gone that long. Her brain, her body, had been elsewhere. Elsewhere, even though it wasn't enough.
"You know where we'll be…" Jacob's voice, her brother's, her Alpha's voice, was harsh and cruel. He was disappointed, he didn't know, but still, the lateness of her stay was inconsiderate to the pack. Something that she should have announced to them before.
Her body was swift, weaving through the trees, she was a blur. Her mind was unfocused, the light from the sun a glaring mark of her destination. She didn't want to go there, didn't want to be judged. They would smell the men on her, realized where she had been.
Humans were to never be involved something that she had been unable to deny. Their emotions, the taste of them on her tongue… she had been empty for so long. She needed to feel. Her imprint had denied her, and because of it she was destined to live life of an emotionless, tasteless, bitter girl.
Too young to have done what she did.
Too empty to care, or to even notice.
These euphoric emotions coasting through her would only last but an hour. After that she would be the shell again.
"Isabella, do you realize what you have done tonight?" The voice of her brother filtered through her desperate running, but no response was needed from her.
"If he realizes what you've done, he'll be furious. He'll hunt those boys down and kill them. He may kill you."
Bella growled her voice without words because of the shift. He chose, she thought, he chose her. Am I to live my life without feeling? Her throat hurt, her eyes burned, but she knew it was not tears. The emotions were burning away. The anger coursing through her shortened the amount of time she had left.
She should have known Jacob would know, nothing was a secret from him, even if she tried desperately to hide it.
She slowed upon reaching the boundary of the lands; to the right laid the Cullen's. Their smell was as pungent as death, and the line that divided the two species was even stronger. Death to life. She was alive… he was dead. His heart did not beat, his breath was unnecessary. He had chosen her, the beauty of his kind. She was his to keep. Forever in their perfect love.
Jacob was wrong, if he believed that Edward would care who she had been with, then he was sorely mistaken. Edward barely looked at her, and the disgust in his eyes when he did… she did not want him to look at her.
Picking up her pace again, she unleashed the rest of her emotions, laying her inner self barren to the openness, the blackness. She knew that Jasper would feel her, sense her emptiness. He never breathed a word of it, but still. The implications were there.
Glancing to the side she saw the vampires in the midst of hunting, their hands grasping at the animals they had recently grappled with. It was disgusting, their need for blood. She couldn't watch any longer. Turning away she sprinted again, her feet biting at the ground. She glanced back once more, her eyes connecting with those of her imprint's. She growled at him, her face malicious. He hated her, but she felt nothing because of him.
Emptiness was beginning to feel like a crime.
She turned away just as he was lifting his head to sniff the air. She left them behind an enraged growl following in her wake.
So much for hiding tonight's actions.
She shifted quickly, her body turning human once more as she reached the wolf filled clearing. She crouched behind a tall pine, digging through the underbrush she pulled out a pair of ripped jean shorts and a thin-as-paper camisole. She had adjusted to life as a wolf, nothing pretty, nothing expensive, and no bras or underwear. She was too tempted to shift at any moment, and those things cost too much.
"Where have you been?" Paul's harsh voice cut across the clearing, slashing through her flimsy defenses.
Her answer was curt; "Don't worry about it." She moved into the open, her legs eating the distance between them.
Ravenous, enraged growls could be heard in the distance, but the wolves, not including Jacob, chose to ignore it.
"He's angry, Bella. Aren't you the least bit worried?" His voice was filled with calm, and if she could hate, then she would most definitely hate him.
She shrugged nonchalantly, her eyes tilting to stare off into the forest as Leah, her best-friend, moved lithely into the clearing. Bella could feel energy thrumming through the girl, and knew she had participated in many of the same acts Bella had. Feeding, and living off the emotions of others.
She nodded her head in greeting when their eyes locked, waving her hand in their "we'll talk later" signal, she scooted past Jacob.
She didn't like this type of thing, the type of thing that involving interacting with the rest of the pact. She wasn't built for that type of shit. Hell, she wasn't even made for life in general, her depressing attitude was unintentional, but it was all she knew. She'd never been liked much, and once she'd shifted, it seemed as if the hate had increased. Yes, her mother had originally been married to Charlie Swan, but it wasn't her fault that she'd had an affair with Billy Black.
She caught Charlie staring at her sometimes, a sad look in his eyes.
Yeah, everyone wanted her.
She was stuck here with the hatred that should have been focused upon her mother. And now, little Miss Danny Swan thought she could turn dead and make Bella's life hell. Cutting out her heart, stealing her imprint, bearing his children. She was full of fucking love for Bella Black wasn't she? It was like a terminally ill disease, something contagious and hideous.
Bella hated her.
"Bells!" Glancing towards the voice, she was surprised to find Paul Lahote calling for her. "What's that smell on your skin, B?" His voice was harsh, and she realized that the smile lighting his features wasn't kindness. Maliciously he stepped towards her, his nose pushing against her throat. She was helpless to ignore him, as pack Beta, Paul had the right to do whatever he wanted with her.
"Smells like human male…." He licked her throat. "Two of them, by the smell."
"Paul, enough!" The growling voice split through the clearing like a knife, and a glance to her side proved her worst fears. Edward Cullen, his hands clenched, his eyes dark black—even after his recent feeding—stood there. His body was lithe as he moved into the clearing, the body of a viciously dead animal.
She shouldn't want him, but just the site of his god like face made her emotionless heart flutter with want. She felt creamy, and warm, and a haze settled over her eyes, preventing her from seeing anyone—anything—else.
Moving to take him out of her vision she stalked towards Leah, grasping the girl's hand when she stretched it out. Emotions flowed through her, the taste undeniable, the feeling so needed. She almost hadn't remembered. It had only been bunched minutes, but the emptiness made a person forget even the most recent event feelings.
"Better?" Leah's lips mouthed, Bella nodded in agreement. She was slightly better, but she could tell, could sense that Leah was losing grips, fighting to keep hold of what she was about to let go of. She shouldn't—neither of them, should have been going through this. This intense longing.
She could feel again, the feelings waning, but the emotions were there. She wanted to hold it, didn't want to forget, because without them she would succumb to her beast. That tangible feeling of overwhelming hatred rendered her motionless as she turned to stare at her imprint. His beautiful, once human, wife coming to stand behind her. She was adjusting. The thought light. Adjusting to the loneliness.
"Edward," She finally murmured, her head nodding towards him. She could feel Leah behind her, the girls body coiled tight, her recent emotions fading almost as quickly as Bella's. "The rest of your family is coming?"
They were training, the upcoming battle lingered over their heads. All this for their daughter, his daughter. The little girl could have been hers, theirs, but she wasn't. Edward had not chosen her, and she could tell that he was very happy with the thought. Even if he was mildly angry by her salacious behavior.
His beautiful face was suddenly pained, he looked like he was going to say something, but then decided better of it. "Yes," he nodded, his refined hair moving slightly. "They are here now." As he spoke eight vampires made their way out of the forest. Their faces were smooth, their eyes and bodies cool and unfeeling.
But they could feel, they had emotion where Bella and Leah did not. She wanted them to have empathy for her, but even that feeling was draining. Want. She wasn't going to remember what it meant in a few seconds. The delicacy was going to disappear.
Good bye... She thought, just as the fleeting emotions left her barren once again. She glanced towards Jasper, noticing the way he stared at her. His golden eyes were full of slight concern, but she quickly turned away from him. Her eye s moving towards her brother. He was embracing his imprint, his arms rapped protectively around the small girl's frame.
Bella glanced back towards Leah, a silent communication slipping though their thoughts. Yes, they would suggest their recent thoughts. Protecting Jacob's imprint was their duty. They both new that having Edward do it would be unwise. Besides, the wolves allies were greater than the vampires, and they wouldn't be as missed.
Glancing around, Bella realized that they had been having their quiet conversation much longer than they thought, because the group had gathered and were already participating in strenuous fight situations.
It was now or never, Bella thought.
"Jared!" Leah spoke, her voice cutting through the friendly brawls. She jerked her head towards Bella when he glanced over. He jogged towards them, his limbs eating up the harsh ground. He stopped in front of them, his back stiff, his eyes dark, his lip was turned down a sneer and he sniffed the air as he stared at them.
"Both of you?" he finally asked, very quietly. His look was one of disappointment, and his trust in them seemed to be waning.
"You don't understand-," Bella began, but stopped when she realized Edward was staring at her. She wouldn't give him the privilege of understanding their reasoning. Of what they were going through. It was too much, too embarrassing. A hardship that neither wanted. Their imprints despised them, and they weren't going to force themselves on them.
Leah was the one who spoke first. "We're leaving to gather allies." Her voice was crisp, her mahogany eyes hard with emotionlessness. Gaining allies was not the only reason they were leaving. They wanted, no needed, to know if there were others like them out there, others who had been taken for granted, despised by their soul mate, rendered emotionless. They needed to know if they were the only ones. They couldn't be the only ones.
Jared looked between them, his eyes bouncing off of them, he wanted to question why, needed to understand, but he wouldn't ask. No one every asked. No one ever noticed.
Bella glanced towards Edward again, but he was no longer looking at her, his arms were wrapped around Danny, his eyes full of love as he stared down at her. Whispered something secretive in her ear, Bella watched as he laid a kiss to her cheek. It felt odd in her heart, an empty sensation, an emotion that should have been there but wasn't. He looked towards her again, their eyes locking, she glanced away.
She didn't need that, didn't need to see the disdain. She wouldn't feel the hurt, but she knew that she should have. She wanted to. She wanted any emotion. Looking back at Jared, she realized the second he understood. His eyes locked on hers, and then on Leah's form as she stared at Sam, his body thrumming with the shift. He understood now, the constant sexual partners, the holding hands, the questions of how long this time or was that enough. They were a bleeding heart. Something that needed, but would never survive. He must have never believed the stories. The ones of the empty wolves, the bitter creature that lived off of humans, survived without love, and was eternally alone.
Finally he spoke. "Where are you going?" His words were soft, barely louder than the shudder of the earth. The taunting call that pulled them down.
"Don't worry about it, Jared." Leah spoke, her mouth soft and dreamy, an endless smile on her lips. She stretched her arms up towards the vibrantly blue sky, her limps creaking with an attempt to keep the change.
"Tell Edward-," Bella spoke, but paused to gather her thoughts. "Don't let him leave his family. This is something the pack will handle. Something that we will handle." Her voice was full of conviction, something that she lacked inside her heart.
Jared was the Beta, he would inform Jacob of their decision. Let him know that they had left.
"When will you leave?" Jared's voice was soft and friendly, he trusted them completely.
"Now." Bella murmured. Her eyes kept wandering back to Edward, to his mouth, his eyes, the way he looked down at his beautiful wife.
They didn't wait after that, their bodies shifted quickly, their limbs forming something that seemed to swallow their humanity whole.
"Good luck." Jared's eyes were full, was he frightened for them. Did he not believe they would survive the other packs.
They would prove him wrong.
Bella howled out a long, disparaging howl, and just as the pack and Cullen's turned towards them they were gone. Their bodies leading them though the woods, their eyes lighting through the woods. The sun was overhead, hanging on the bend of the earth. They needed the light, because the dark was empty just like them.
Their feet lead them where they needed to go, the pack vanishing from their minds.
I will accept this... Bella thought.
Long ago, when war raged through the tribes, and imprinting happened often among the wolves, the empty ones roamed. Their eyes dead, their heart hungry for feelings, they longed for their imprints. Denied to them by decision, they waited, hoping to be wanted, waiting to be accepted. Their hungers grew, and finally they vanished, taking their loneliness with them.
Slowly, they became something unnatural, the separation from their soul mate unbearable. They were violent, vicious to the point of demonic. The empty ones destroyed themselves. Hating what they were. Their wolf song was gone, their imprints empty.
We still cannot understand...
The moment we became alive death was waiting, chasing
And all of us fell and kept breathing
One day, today
A spirit's alive, a body has died