Itami the Love Doctor

All I was doing was going to the kitchen to get a snack on my one day off of training when I witnessed the most disturbing of actions.


I opened my bedroom door to the corridor that all the bedrooms came off of. I took one step out and saw one thing. Hidan and Eienni. But they weren't sharing curse words. No, I definitely saw them doing something much different. No, I saw them kissing. No, I didn't misspell cussing. I slid back into my room and closed the door. A few seconds after, there was a knock on my door. I opened it to find Hidan standing at the door.

"I need your help"

End Flashback

And now Hidan is sitting on my bed while I pace my floor. I came up with an idea and ran to my dresser. I rummaged through my sock and underwear draw in search for it.

"YES!" I exclaimed when I found it. The knife Hidan had bought me for my birthday.

"Here," I handed it to him. The two of us were freaking out. Hidan took the knife and stood up.

"Thanks," he was polite for once. I nodded.

"You need it more than me at the moment," I replied still nodding. I turned from him slowly as I went back to thinking. Hidan stabbed himself through the chest.

"DON'T BLEED ON MY FLOOR!" I yelled and whirled back round catching Hidan off guard in the process. He placed a cupped hand on his chest where the trail of blood ran down to catch the red liquid.

"What now?" He asked. I thought quickly.

"Um, let's go in your basement," I decided. He nodded and we left for Hidan's sacrificial basement. After entering I went back to pacing in thought.

"Why me? Why did you have to come to ME? Of all people? I know nothing of dating! I've never even had a BOYFRIEND!" I ranted. Hidan nodded.

"You're right but I can't go to anyone else and you're my best friend," Hidan argued. I growled in frustration.

"WELL I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!" I yelled back at him. He just gave me that irresistible blank stare I hate so much.

"Look, you two were kissing so just tell her that you like her. If she feels the same then good, the both of you can work it out from there. If not then get over her," I replied. He stared at me with his eyebrows raised in surprise.

"Wow, that's actually a good plan," he stated. I smiled smugly.

If only I had of used it when I had the chance.

"Cool, then I'm going," I leave. Hidan kinda of just sat on the floor thinking of what he's going to say.

Later that day, I was just sitting on my bed when my door burst open. I lifted my head from my pillow to see a rather distressed albino at my door step. He entered then quickly closed the door and stood against it to stop anyone from entering, not that I thought anyone would dare enter my room.

"What did you do?" I asked. He smiled a fake smile and crossed his arms.

"Well... you see... I... ah... it's sorta," Hidan stammered. After a while of it I got tired.

"What did you do, Hidan?" I pressed.



Hidan walked into the lounge room, muttering to himself what he had to do and say. He looked up to see Eienni sitting on the couch. He walked up to her then sat on the couch next to her.

"What do you want, heathen?" She asked. Hidan started freaking out and so Hidan did what Hidan's do best... He made a fool of himself.

"I LOVE YOU!" He yelled in her face them instantly got up and ran to Itami's room.

End Flashback

"So, yeah," Hidan finished retelling the prior events. I stared at him with no emotion on my face for a few seconds then burst into laughter.

"You are ridiculous!" I spoke through chuckles. He sighed.

"Just tell me what to do now," Hidan pleaded with me. I smiled at him, after my laughter faded.

"Just wait," I answered him but he didn't seem to like it.


"You need to be patient. Give her a few minutes to realize what happen then you'll find her knocking on your bedroom door. But not my bedroom door so GET OUT AND GET A LIFE!" I yelled as I pushed him out of my room and locked the door.

"Finally, peace and quiet," I told myself then lay down on my bed. I looked at the picture on my right bed side table. I gave a sigh.