What The Future Holds
Time-Line: Season 5, before Emily/Christmas Carol episode.
Disclaimer: I do not own the X-fles, this is written for fun not profit.
They were tired as they opened their adjoined motel rooms and tossed their luggage on their beds and then closed the doors behind them. Scully looked out at the strip mall where the motel was connected and pointed towards the dumpy-looking restaurant at the end of it.
"At least there's a place to eat," Mulder said.
Scully rolled her eyes. "It looks like we'll be their only customers, Mulder, that's not a good sign."
They walked passed several businesses and Mulder noticed Scully's eyes widen as she stopped in her tracks and stared at the flashing neon sign of one of the businesses. She turned and walked on but Mulder noted her curiosity with the local Psychic/Tarot Card establishment. After their meal which they both wished they hadn't eaten, they walked back down the long cement strip and just as they came upon the Psychic shop, Mulder grabbed Scully's hand, pulling her towards the entrance. He wasn't surprised though that she stopped in her tracks and yanked her hand out of his. "MULDER, what are you doing?"
"I thought it would be fun to see what our future holds, Scully. I'm buying."
"Mulder, I don't think that's a good idea," she said, sadly.
Mulder could tell she was thinking about her cancer and for a moment he nearly walked on but instead he grabbed her hand again. "Don't go there, Scully. This is just for fun, okay? Something different. I mean, we had a rough day today with all the dead bodies we uncovered from that sick bastard who committed suicide. They are handling the autopsies locally so you have a break and I have a break and we can finally get some sleep after working this case for four days...let's just go in here and have a little fun, alright?"
Scully glanced down at Mulder's hand gripping hers and he quickly let her hand go. She nodded and then followed him in. "Remember, we won't say anything, we'll let her tell us what she thinks our future is," he whispered.
An older woman who was wearing a obivious black wig with white hairs sticking out from underneath welcomed them in to her small store-front shop. She motioned for them to sit at her round table where she placed a few cards down. "I'm a card reader, my name is Madame Diamond and welcome to my shop."
Mulder smiled but Scully sighed loudly and looked past the woman to the rolls of tarot cards, crystals and incense the woman garshly displayed for sale behind her. "Its $10 each for a card reading," she said, looking them over.
Mulder reached into his pocket and handed her a $20 bill. She smiled and then began to lay out her cards. "Hmm...interesting."
Mulder nudge Scully in the side and she glared at him. "I see you have been together for a few years."
"Yes," Mulder nodded.
"You are truly in love,"
Scully frowned while Mulder smirked. Scully was about to speak but Mulder stilled her hand and pinched it. "OUCH!", she yelled.
Madame Diamond was staring at the cards, not paying attention to the two agents in front of her. "This is incredible. I've never seen this before."
"What?", Mulder asked.
"Not only are you in love but you have an epic love. A love like no other," she said, staring at the two.
Scully looked annoyed while Mulder looked amused. "Once in a while in the universe there is a pure love and you both have that love. You are soul mates, one half of a whole. You are partners in love and partners in life."
"Mulder!", Scully said, standing up. "This is ridiculous."
"Scully, just give her a chance," he said, smiling meekly as he urged her to stay.
Scully flopped back down reluctantly as Mulder watched her. She could feel the back of her neck and ears reddening. "Go ahead," she sighed.
Madame Diamond unperturbed continued on with her reading. "I see you are both very important in this world and will live very long lives."
"That's good news," Mulder said, glancing at Scully who was staring down at her hands.
"I see a child for you both," Madame Diamond announced. "A very special child. An important child to humanity."
Mulder looked at Scully out of the corner of his eye. Scully whirled around and faced him and then looked back at Madame Diamond. "I...", she sighed, knowing that what she was about to say, Mulder had never known. "I am unable to have children," she said, slowly.
Mulder's eyes widened and his hand immediately went out to touch hers. She gripped his hand and stared at it, unable to look him in the eye. "Because of what they did to me, because of my cancer."
She could see Mulder's head drop low and she knew he was blaming himself. "It's not your fault, Mulder."
"Yes, it is," he whispered.
"But I clearly see," Madame Diamond continued. "That you WILL have a son! Your son is important to the world. You will be a mother."
At that, Scully yanked her hand from Mulder's and walked out into the crisp night air. Mulder stood up and thanked the woman and then followed Scully out.
"I hope our son doesn't have your temper," Mulder joked but stopped when he saw the tears cradled in her blue eyes. She blinked them away. "I thought this would be fun, Scully, I didn't think it would make you upset."
Scully was quiet, her arms crossed defensively in front of her. "I know Mulder but it disturbed me."
"Why? Because she thought we were a couple?", he said,again attempting humor.
"I just found out about not being able to have kids," she said, looking at him. "I always assumed that it would happen, when I had the time and found the right man."
Mulder shifted his foot and looked at her. "I'm sure you will."
She stared at him for a long while until he turned to look behind him and then back towards her. "Scully, why didn't you tell me?"
Scully looked surprised. "It was personal, Mulder."
He looked down at his feet and then back up to her. "I know but...it involves me."
"How?", she said, frowning.
"Because I'm the reason they gave you cancer. I'm the reason they abducted you."
"It's not your fault, Mulder," she sighed. "But they did take me and use me and did tests on me but you didn't do it. It wasn't you. It's not your fault."
"I thought this would be fun," he repeated.
Scully touched his hand briefly. "Let's go."
After an hour of sitting on her bed, she heard a knock on the connecting door. "Come in."
Mulder came in with a two plastic cups and a paper covered bottle. Scully smiled and Mulder sat down beside her and poured the vodka. "Thought since that didn't work, maybe this would."
He poured the vodka and then pulled out a bottle of orange juice from the large bag and poured that in. He mixed each cup with his fingers and then handed her one. She thanked him and then took a nice big gulp. He did the same and then kicked off his shoes. He sighed and then stared at the shades that covered the window of her motel room. "I don't think I'll ever have kids either," he said, finally.
Scully cocked her head to look at him. "Why not?"
Mulder locked eyes with her until she glanced away. "I don't think it's in my future."
"I'm sure there's plenty of women that would jump at the chance..."
"To deal with me long enough to create kids?", he laughed. "I don't think so."
"I didn't know you wanted kids," she said, gulping down even more of the liquid as it burned her throat going down.
"I think about it sometimes," he said, sipping on his own drink. "About what it would be like to have a wife and kids...to live a normal life. I tried it once and it didn't work out," he said, looking away.
Scully stared at the side of his head not sure if she'd heard him right. "You were married once?"
Mulder turned to her. "It didn't last long enough to warrant an annulment," he said. "It was a few years ago, I have avoided love ever since."
Scully nodded. "I was engaged once."
Mulder looked at her curiously. "Who, Jack?"
Scully laughed which made Mulder smile. "No, silly...", she said, shaking her head. "His name was Ethan and he was a jerk."
"More of a jerk than Jack?"
Scully's eyes narrowed as she stared at him. Mulder smirked and then finished his drink, pouring himself some more.
"Slow down, we have to catch a plane tomorrow morning."
"Right," Mulder said, still mixing his drink with his finger. "Come on, tell me...about this Ethan."
"He and I would've been married eventually."
"If not for what?"
Scully shook her head. "If not for you..."
"Me?", Mulder said. "What do you mean?"
"My assignment to you...that changed everything between us. I left him to join you on our first case."
Mulder's smile widened into a goofy grin. "Really?"
"Yes," she said, extending her cup so he could pour juice and vodka into her cup. She swirled the mixture around and then began to drink it down. "We're gonna be drunk."
"Hmm," Mulder said, waggling his eyebrows.
"Not a chance," she said.
"A guy could dream, couldn't he?"
Scully smiled. "So, tell me about this future you dream about," she said, changing the subject.
Mulder loosened his tie and tossed it on to the floor. Scully quickly jumped up from the bed and picked up his tie and shoes and arranged them neatly. She was aware of Mulder staring at her but she was used to it. Her heart fluttered slightly at the thought of him checking her out but she pushed that thought in the back of her mind. When she returned to her seat, Mulder smiled. "I would love to have a couple of kids, maybe a suburban home."
"YOU?", she said, shocked. "COME ON, Mulder. Seriously?"
"Okay,well, not a cookie cutter suburban home...but a nice country home somewhere, far away from the city."
"So, 2.5 kids?"
"Yeah...," he said, dreamily. "I dream about my kids, a little girl and a little boy. The girl is tough and the boy is humourous and my wife is supportive and loving."
"Hmm...", Scully said, as she stared at him.
"And we just have normal lives...holidays, birthdays...you know, normal stuff. There's no aliens or monsters, there's nothing like that."
"Really?", she said, surprised.
"Yeah," he sighed. "And I dream about being covered in grandkids and having my sister and her kids around me. Playing basketball with my son, even playing Barbies with my daughter."
At that Scully erupted into laughter. "What?", Mulder asked.
"I just can't picture you playing Barbies, Mulder."
He smiled. "There's so much you don't know about me, Scully. I used to play Barbies with Samantha."
She continued to smile but Mulder then turned to her. "Okay, whats your dreams?"
"Yes, " he said, gulping down the last bit of his vodka.
"I guess a few kids," she said, looking down sadly at her hands. "A supportive husband. A home...to see my mother smile as she held her grandkids, my kids, as she did Charles kids and will do with Bill's first child. I want that too," she said, her head draped down.
"You can still have that, Scully. Theres options."
"But it wouldn't be my biological child. They wouldn't have my hair, my eyes."
"You can adopt a baby that will look just like you," he said, his heart breaking as he watched a tear trail down her cheek. "You can even carry the baby, Scully," he said. "So you can experience child-birth, there are options."
Scully nodded. "I think I better lay down," she said, as sadness crept back into her eyes and shoulders.
Mulder stood up and watched as she gathered her things for a bath. "Goodnight, Scully..."
She looked up at him. "Goodnight Mulder."
He turned and walked back through the connecting door. She stared at it for a while and then made her way to the bathroom. She filled the tub and then undressed and sank down into the water. She erupted into tears and she covered her mouth so no one especially Mulder could hear her. "I want a baby with you," she whispered, thinking about Mulder. "But that will never happen."
Mulder sank down on his bed cursing under his breath at himself for causing Scully to feel pain and for his failed attempt at lighting her day which ended up making her feel worst. His heart was heavy because he loved her but knew she didn't love him. Even worst was that she was the one he wanted to have children with, no one else. Suddenly his heart began to ache even more for her lost but for his own. He would never see his own dreams come true, the ones he had when he thought of his future with Scully.
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