It's been almost two sweeps since you watched Vriska Serket die.
You'd been angry at her, and that's still the worst part. You'd been furious. You'd thrown the dress you'd spent so long making for her out the window, the dress that you'd put such intrinsic care into, the dress you'd hoped would somehow make her see how you felt about her.
She was the first girl to break your heart and you saved her life, only to watch it be ripped away from her right in front of you.
Only to watch her be ripped away right in front of you.
And now here she is, standing in front of you as if she's never left, arms folded and lips set in a casual smirk that doesn't do enough to hide the nervous furrowing of her eyebrows. She used to be a head taller than you, but now you're the one looking down at her. You've grown so much and she hasn't aged a day.
Your name is Kanaya Maryam and you have no idea what to do.
"Hey," she says at last. Seeing her face, hearing her speak – it's surreal. It's like you're looking at a ghost.
You realize you are looking at a ghost.
"You never appreciated it," you blurt out. She jolts, looking startled. You know she wouldn't have expected to hear that from you. You don't care.
"What?" she says, blinking with confusion. "Look, Fussyfangs, I have noooooooo idea what you're talking about. You haven't seen me in I don't even know how long and you don't even say hi?" She rolls her eyes and snorts like she couldn't care less, but you can tell you've upset her. You could always tell.
"Any of it," you continue like you haven't heard her. "I saved your life. You didn't care. And then you threw it away. How could you have been so stupid?"
She takes a step back. There's something you've never before seen written on her face. It's fear. Vriska Serket is six sweeps old and you are almost eight and you are yelling at a child.
You notice your fists are clenched at your sides and your entire body is shaking with emotion.
"Kanaya—" she starts.
"Don't," you order. "I don't want you in my life. I don't need you. It's been almost two sweeps and you think you have the right to just walk back in? It's typical. You haven't changed at all."
It's a stupid statement. Of course she hasn't. She's exactly the same as the day she died.
Her eyes narrow, and all of a sudden she's in your face, standing on her tiptoes, hands on her hips. "I didn't have to come back here to see you, you know. I always knew you were flushed for me. I just didn't CARE! But you were just so PATHETIC about it, I decided I would come back to see you. You should be GR8FUL!" she yells, and you can see her eyes blinking rapidly as she whirls around.
You want to tell her to stop as she begins storming away. You didn't mean any of it. You didn't.
But the words won't come, and as you reach a hand towards her retreating form, everything begins to dissolve. All of a sudden you're lying on the ground on the ship with your friends staring down at you and a nauseous feeling washes over you as you realize what's happened. It had been a dream – all of it, just a dream. How could you have guessed? This was the first time you'd ever encountered her in a dream bubble.
An involuntary sob wracks your body as you realize it could also be the last.