Sybil was lost in her thoughts. Her suitcase was open on the bed but still empty. She was standing near her daughter's cradle and the baby was watching her with her big blue and round eyes. « You've got your father's eyes », she said softly while wondering if she could drown again in her husband's ones one day.
He had been taken away from her only a few hours ago but it already seemed like an eternity to her. Yet, she still could feel his presence everywhere in the room. From his jacket, negligently put at the end of the bed, to his books on the bedside table. And his smell…it was everywhere. Overwhelmed by a new wave of tears, Sybil ran off to the bed. With a furious gesture, she sent the suitcase flying on the floor and threw herself on the soft quilt which had, a few hours ago, protected them from the prying looks of their family. She buried her head into the pillow to stifle her sobs but also to get drunk with his smell. She wanted to forget it all. She wanted to go back when, at dawn, she had felt his hand climb from her stomach to her breasts.
A knock against the door made her jump and she sighed while wiping the tears on her cheeks.
"Leave me alone. I won't change my mind", she screamed to the person who was standing on the other side of the door. "Go away! I don't want to see anybody unless you're bringing my husband back."
"I'm not here to change your mind", answered softly Matthew. "And I'm sorry I don't have the power to bring Tom back but, can I come in, please?"
Sybil sighed again. She didn't know if that was his voice or because he called her husband by name but she changed her mind. So she got up and, not bothering with her appearance, she went to the door. She opened it and without waiting for Matthew to get in, she went to pause in front of the big open closet and stayed here, as if what was lying inside was suddenly the most interesting thing in the world.
"You can tell them that I won't change my mind", she finally said." I have to find him."
"Like I said, I'm not here to change your mind but to tell you that I'll come with you."
Sybil hiccupped in surprise and finally turned towards him. Matthew's heart tightened upon seeing her tangled hair but especially her eyes reddened and puffed because of all the tears. And yet, she had this so determined look on her face, this look that was telling him that nothing could stop her.
"This can't be negotiated", he added softly with a sad smile.
"You want Mary to kill me, right? She won't let you go", answered Sybil somewhat relieved for not having to face everything alone.
"I'll handle Mary, don't worry."
"I can't ask you that", she said while shaking her head. "It could be dangerous over there. And if something happened to you, I could never forgive myself…nor could my sister or my father."
"Like I said, it can't be negotiated. I promised Tom I'll watch over you and that's exactly what I'm gonna do."
Sybil shuddered lightly by hearing her husband's name and he took a step towards her.
"We'll find a way to get him back", he said putting a hand on her shoulder to comfort her.
"And if we can't?" She answered softly before crying again.
Not having an answer to this difficult question, Matthew took her in his arms, trying to comfort her. And if, indeed, they couldn't do anything for him? His eyes slipped towards Eireen's cradle. The baby was gently babbling, completely unaware of the drama taking place. Why couldn't they have some rest? wondered Matthew, remembering that a few weeks ago, Tom had almost lost both his wife and baby. So, as he was lulling Sybil in his arms to absorb as much sorrow as he could, he swore to do all that was in his power to try to reunite this family again.