Thank you for still sticking with me, you lot are awfully lovely and I hope you're still enjoying it! There's definitely still loads more to come if you still want it. I would like to dedicate this chapter to Rachel because it's her birthday (Happy Birthday Rachel!). Onwards...

3rd May, 08:07

Dean has decided to call the plant Penelope, I'm not sure why. What is more confusing, however, is that when I got up this morning he was watering it. He never remembers to water the plant.


Dean says he feels bad about all the mornings he forgot to water the plant. I won't tell him that he nearly drowned it and I had to save it. That may hurt his feelings. Besides, I appreciate the gesture.


Dean is singing 'Walking On Sunshine' in the shower. I hope he cannot hear me laughing.


I am not laughing in a mean way. I am laughing in a 'Dean sounds happy and can sing very high pitch notes' kind of way. I don't understand why that makes me want to laugh, but it does.


I was attempting to make fried eggs (thus far my endeavours in this task have been unsuccessful), when Dean came out the shower with only a towel on, and put his arms round my waist. My stomach experienced a very odd twisting sensation that gave me the urge to kiss him for a long time. I wonder if that is a normal reaction for humans to have.


Dean took over the frying of the eggs; he is much more accomplished in the kitchen than I. It is a skill I must work on.


I asked Dean if he was still missing hunting. He said he was, but he was getting used to it and that he has something else to occupy him now.


I wonder what that is.


Oh, it's me. He means I occupy him. How thoughtful.


Sam came to our apartment unexpected. Dean didn't say anything about us so I guessed that he wanted to keep it a secret. I was very careful to act like we are still just friends, but Dean kept looking at me in a funny way. When he didn't think I was looking at him, he looked guilty.


Sam went to the toilet and Dean sighed and turned to face me. He told me he was sorry but he wasn't ready to tell people yet. I told him it okay and that I understood, but I lied. I do not understand at all, but if it makes Dean feel unhappy to tell Sam then I am okay with him not telling Sam, because all I want is for him to be happy.


Sam's gone but something's wrong with Dean. We lay on the couch for a long time; Dean kept running his fingers through my hair and kissing my head. Then he said he had to go out.


The plant looks sad that Dean isn't here. Maybe the plant likes Dean more than it likes me because it was Dean that watered it today.


Or maybe the plant likes Dean more because Dean named it Penelope. I will now comply with this folly and refer to the plant by name.


I wonder what Penelope would say if she could talk.


Dean came back whilst I was trying to work out if the fridge light stays on when I close the door. He stood in the doorway and shook his head and then laughed. Then he said he had something for me. He told me to close my eyes and to stay where I was. He told me off because I tried to peep.


Dean brought me another plant! He said I could name this one so I chose Percy. He said he felt like he had let me down by not telling Sam about us, and wanted to make it up to me. I replied by saying he was being silly and I didn't mind waiting until he was ready. Next he did the thing where he pulls me into him very quickly and kisses me until I feel like I'm going to fall over.


I thought that kissing Dean would get boring after a while, but it just gets better every time.


This is not good. This is the worst thing that could have possibly happened and I am not prepared.


Dean was on his laptop and I was reading a book about evolution when a knock came on the door. I thought this was very odd because it was unlikely Sam would call twice in one day, and the only other person it could be is Anna, and she would always calls ahead. It wasn't either of them. It was Crowley.


I don't know how. The only way it would be possible is if he was on our side when we shut the gates of hell, but we made sure he wasn't.


Dean completely freaked out, naturally. Crowley is in the kitchen drinking whiskey and Sam in on the way. I should call Anna and let her know what's going on. She needs to get somewhere safe. As do we.


I am absolutely useless as a human. I need a way of protecting Dean.


Crowley said we were acting like little girls, which I believe to be an unfair judgement. He also said he's not talking until Sam gets here. He said he wants the 'old gang' back together.


Dean is shouting quite a lot. He's scaring me. I cannot let him do anything stupid.


Sam has finally arrived. He thought that Crowley might not really be Crowley, that he may have been a shape shifter and consequently tried to attack Crowley with a silver knife.


It definitely is Crowley and now he's in a very bad mood.


He won't tell us how he got out, or if he ever got sent back to hell. All he's saying is that we have an angel problem. I don't trust him. We made our peace with the angels; they have no reason to come back here.


Dean has the look in his eye he gets when he's on a hunt. I cannot stop him going with Crowley, but I wish I could. All that is left for me to do is go with him and do everything in my power to keep him from harm.


Crowley has given us a meeting place. Sam said he needs to go home and tell Amelia what is happening.


I sat Dean down and told him to breathe. Then he started crying and I now understand what it means when people say their heart breaks. Watching Dean crying is the greatest pain I have ever known. He said that he was finally starting to feel happy and then something like this has to happen. I didn't know what to do, so I just held him.


Dean said he wants me to stay here where I'm safe. He held my face in his hands and looked straight into my eye. I told him that was not possible and that I had to do everything in my power to make sure he does not get hurt. He kissed me, but it felt different this time, as though he was scared he might not be able to do it again.


We're on our way to meet Crowley.