"Godsdamnit, Percy, wake up now or I'll forcibly drag your sorry ass out of bed!"

"Ughh... gods, Annabeth, no need to be so mean. Can I just have five more—"

"NO, YOU CAN'T, MOTHERFUCKER!"

"I'M UP, BITCH!"

"Ha ha, motherfucker!"

"Ha ha, bitch!"

"WAFFLES! WAFFLES!"

"...Nico, were they always this weird? Like, when they were younger?"

"Unfortunately."

"Damn, Leo ate all the blue waffles!"

"Whoops. Guess we woke up too late."

"No shit, Sherlock! Now what are we going to do?"

"So... papaya."

"Worst pickup line ever, Perce!"

"She's already my girlfriend! Does making out in a giant air bubble at the bottom of a lake and scaring all the newer kids into thinking we drowned not tell you that?"

"Well, um—"

"DOES IT NOT TELL YOU THAT?!"

"Hello there, sexy, assertive Percy Jackson. Long time no see."

"Thanks, babe."

A/N: Uhm... I'm not really sure where I was going with this, because I'm kind of in a serious crackfic mood, but it's sometime after the second war, and... well, that's pretty much all I know. Use your imagination...? (Seriously, though, it's good for you.)

And thanks for all the birthday wishes today, guys! :) Love you bunches.

EPC