Hi! It's been a while. A long while, but to get things going again I thought I'd hammer out this little puppy. It's not long at all, 4-5 chapters and there's no epi. Well, there isn't one written yet. Depending on reception that could change. I hope enjoy this. Please, share the love if you do and RnR. Thanks for reading though, I do love it.
I didn't like being out by myself. It always felt likes eyes were constantly on me. Watching me. Like every move that I made was being monitored for some reason or another, and I didn't enjoy. I hated it.
Why wasn't Emmett here? All I wanted to do was go out and buy me a cup of coffee. It didn't seem like that much of a big deal. The coffee shop was down three flights of stairs and then another hundred meter walk if I turned right…it was three hundred meters and around a bend if I turned left.
I only know this because I asked Alice to map it out for me. She always asked me to join her for coffee, but I never could get much further than the lobby of our building before we left. She didn't seem bothered by my inability to go places and I know that I shouldn't have been really either, but I couldn't help it.
At least, that's what I was supposed to believe now.
It's not my fault. It's not my fault. I was a victim.
The words still burned to say, but non-the-less, I could deliver them quickly. I didn't wholly believe them, but I could say them out loud with enough conviction to convince both my father and my overbearing brother…I think my therapist believed me for my sake. Little else.
Who wants to fix someone who's too broken to fight back, right?
At the bottom of the stairs, I silently smiled to myself. I probably looked half crazed, but getting this far was big. Yes, my headphones were in and turned up way beyond the point of comfortable and I was wrapped in probably a few too many layers for August, but I was trying m damnedest to cover myself.
Maybe that's why everyone kept staring?
I kept my head down as I headed toward the coffee shop. Few people walked past me, it was after all seven at night. I didn't actually want a coffee. I did however feel like I needed to do something, so I'd be able to tell Em and Ally that I'd managed to do something, even if it was as trivial as going to the coffee shop by myself on a Wednesday evening.
I was probably ten paces from my destination when I'd met a massive wall of, person. My eyes were probably a mile wide as I fought to right myself in order to stand, or apologise, or flee. I all but ripped the headphones out of my ears when I could see his lips moving, but I couldn't make out what he was trying to say.
"Sorry. So sorry—I wasn't watching." I rushed out in a small voice as the man kept talking. I knew now that he was a man, because I finally turned to look at the human road block I'd unknowingly ploughed into.
"Hey," he answered in a soothing voice. I could see his eyes wandering over my body. I knew that I shouldn't have appreciated the act, but I did. It seemed as though he was looking over me, to make sure that I was okay. The same way that Emmett would if I took a spill. "Are you hurt?"
His voice was soft, almost coddling. Similar, maybe to how a stranger would coo to a small child in distress.
Did that make me a small child in distress, or just like one?
"No," I eventually answered as I finally righted myself. Even risen to full height this man dwarfed me. Not quite to the extent of my brother, who I still believe is part sasquatch, near enough. "I'm not hurt. Thank you."
The man looked confused as he cast me another cursory glance. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes. Thank you for asking." I answered confused at his insistence. Why on earth did he care so much about the wellbeing of a stranger that ploughed into him?
"Where were you headed?" he asked quickly. I couldn't help but turn to him with a cocked eyebrow. Why did he care? "Sorry, I just feel rude for knocking you down. I was just coming for a coffee. If that's where you were headed, I'd love to buy you a cup."
Oh. "That's really not necessary. I'm fine. Your fine. No blood no foul." I answered as I tried to head towards the coffee shop. Ten more paces, that's all I had left.
"It's the least I could do." He said softly, his voice incessantly sweet and oddly irresistible.
"Will you let me say no?" I asked. Realising with a start that I may have been flirting.
"No. Not really." He answered softly as he gestured for me to proceed ahead of him.
I counted off the last of my steps with a smile as my unknown coffee friend opened the door for me. I smiled at him and stepped into the small coffee shop. The whole place was filled with the heady scent of coffee, an aroma I'd unknowingly missed. I stood in line, basking in the ambience and gazing over the menu. Coffee was so difficult to order. I was going to get herbal tea. Less hassle, I'd ask if they had peppermint, if not, jasmine or chamomile would suffice.
When it was my turn I ordered my tea quickly, my companion doing so too as he paid for both of our orders. He bought a couple of cookies too, which I thought was cute as he lead us to a quiet table in the back to wait for our drinks.
"I'm sorry, I didn't get to introduce myself earlier. I'm Edward." I smiled. He looked like an Edward. He carried that self-assured, old-soul kind of air about him. The name just seemed fitting, he also had the kind of classic handsomeness about him. I don't know. I think Alice would have described him as 'fuckable'. I guess he was, or appeared to be, but I wasn't about to ask him.
He smiled in response to my name, and I actually half expected a line of some sort. It seemed to be the going thing with men, but instead he tore into his cookie. My whole body flushed when he moaned, I'd not thought a sexual thought about a man in quite a long time, but right now, I was undeniably aroused.
"Sorry." He muffled around a bite of cookie, his eyes searching my face.
I shook off his apology. Who was I to deny him the enjoyment of his cookie.
"You should try that." He gestured to the oversized cookie in the plate. "It's really good."
Despite m penchant for processed foods, I bit into the cookie a moan of my own slipping forth. I covered my mouth quickly as I slowly chewed and swallowed my cookie. "It really is good."
He just nodded his head, his eyes a little big as he did so.
"I'm sorry about before, Edward." He looked at me a little bit confused. "You know, the running into you thing. It was an accident."
"I can't blame you for a mistake that was entirely my own. Maybe I should apologise to you, Bella? Unless you'd rather agree to disagree and let the issue rest."
No one was really hurt, so I shrugged and just drop the issue. Normally I don't think I would have, but something about him had me believing he'd have won an argument we got into.
We talked about trivial things; our jobs, siblings, family, movies until we'd both finished our cookies and drinks. I hadn't even realised where the time had gone. It was nearly nine. We'd been talking for nearly two hours.
"Hey," Edward said as we got to the door, "I don't think I'm ready to say goodbye to you. Would you like to maybe go for a bite to eat." I shook my head. I didn't really want to try and eat anywhere this late at night, because the only place we'd have to really eat would be diner or fast food outlet and 'd had my fill of processed foods for the evening.
"Oh, uh—," he started and I realised he thought I'd turned him down.
"How about we go up to my apartment. I have a lot of food made and no one around to eat it. I've got wine too, red and white. There's probably beer too and spirits at my brother's if that's more your thing." I probably sounded like a bumbling fool, but I really did enjoy Edward's company and it didn't feel like everyone was looking at me when I was with him.
I felt normal. I liked normal, it wasn't something I felt often. But I liked it.
"I'd like that." He smiled, once again gesturing for me to lead the way.
I didn't count the paces back to my apartment, I walked with my head up and I may have even been smiling. I liked Edward's company. He was probably the first person I'd ever spoken to who didn't know everything that I'd been through. He didn't know the damage my body had suffered, or my mind. I was just a girl. A normal girl.
Dinner was lovely. I wasn't lying when I told him that I had a lot of food. Emmett wanted to make sure that I ate, so he and Alice went to town before they had to leave town. Edward and I settled for the chicken and Broccoli casserole—it was my favourite and Edward seemed to enjoy it too.
We talked more over dinner as he and I opened up a bottle of white wine. At some point we'd raided Emmett's fridge and started on some harder liquor. It was just so easy to be with Edward and talk to him. I learned more about his job and how he worked with his brother. I told him a tiny bit about my life, but I talked mostly of the plans I had for my life now.
He seemed genuinely interested, offering to help me meet the right people if he knew any. He did, by the sounds of things have a lot of contacts. Never in my life had I met a man who wanted to help me out of the goodness of his heart before—well, that wasn't family.
The way he was so kind and adoring, he felt like a dream. The more I drank with him, talked with him, snuggled with him. The less I cared about tomorrow, because right now he was with me.
He was kind of sweet. He made my body sing a song unsung for so long and I loved it. He made me feel pretty and good. Unmarred by a destructive relationship…and I was drunk. He may have been too, but he was just so sweet. Too sweet.
Maybe it was the way the evening was always headed—to the bedroom, but you know what, I didn't care.
I loved the way he caressed my name. I loved the way his fingers ghosted along my body, gently removing my clothes as they went. I loved the feel of his body against me, inside me. I even loved the way he let me be in the moment, he let me feel his body, he let me move with him.
So good. Too good. I wondered if he was good at everything. He seemed the type, but then he changed his movements and that train of thought was gone by way as a moan.
"Baby, you…feel…so good." He purred in my ear, his body moving in a glorious dance with mine as we climbed toward a higher heaven.
His arms we wrapped around me tightly, mine wrapped around him as my nails scrapped up and down the solid ridges of his back, before they settled in his hair that was beyond tousled, glowing a coppery bronze in the muted light through the canopy curtains.
His lips were steadfast as they ghosted down the valley of my breasts, coating my skin with the love of his words, painting my body blush pink as all the blood rushed to the surface.
Our bodies continued to move until finally with his final thrust my body peaked as a new spot was reached, I screamed his name shouting to the heavens the name of the man who claimed me, who loved me. He uttered my name in a growl as he shook, his body softening as he slumped into mine, his weight adding to his reality.
Everything about Edward felt like a dream. He just seemed so perfect. Stunning. It felt too good being with him. '
Come morning light, I hated that I was right.