For so long, I have been in the dark. The dark is a deep tunnelling abyss, never ending, never really beginning. Everything is blackness, no light, no shadow, no prism of colour. You can lose yourself so easily while being in the darkness; because there, time is nothing. The light is a painful memory that you once tried to cling to. But now, it's a long lost hope, an attempt to regain dignity again. But now even trying to imagine a picture is a struggle, because you can't remember how anything appears.
There is no difference between day and night, and no rising sun in the morning or setting sun in the evening. Sometimes, you think the darkness is moving, twisting and tumbling further on into the tunnel of darkness. But you never reach your destination. You're forever travelling, the lonely pilgrim who can't find shelter. You're dwarfed by the ever consuming empty solitude of the darkness, no escape from giant of destruction.
Clawing at anything, you grip to the only senses you have left. Each touch of velvet feels like the clouds of heaven and each touch of her skin feels like softest silk. Yet it is torture. You're so close to seeing; you can feel what should be in front of your eyes. It's so near to you, yet the barrier of blindness is keeping you from it. Every morsel of food is as precious to me as gold is to a beggar. But even then, it's torture; you can taste what should be in front of your eyes. Every sip of thick wine is like ambrosia. But you still can't see it. You train yourself to hear everything and anything. The footsteps approaching, the door closing, the bird free in the trees singing.
Sometimes, all you want to do is scream, loud and long, and tear at your skin, to try to release yourself from the prison that you are trapped in. To be able to run without an aid and to be able to explore without an arm to clasp is a dream now long ignored. The yearning will never leave though. You will always be taunted by the recollection of your former life, of your independence that was so cruelly snatched away from you. That will never leave. But your sight will never come back. The darkness will stay with you always.