Akizuki Ritsuko-The Girl
Otonashi Kotori-the Girl's Mother
Akizuki Ritsuko was an only child who lived with her mother Otonashi Kotori in a cottage in a village ruled by a king who liked taxing his subjects. Ritsuko never really complained about having to help her mother gain money to pay the taxes. She was used to doing taxes, earning money, and having a budget. After all, she was a producer. The only time it ever bothered her was when her family suddenly ran out of money.
On that day King Producer rode through the town collecting his taxes. When he reached Ritsuko's house, he stopped and looked down at Kotori.
"I have come to collect your taxes," he announced. "If you do not give them to me, I will burn down your house, whether it says to do so in the actual story or not."
"I don't have the money," Kotori began, "but my only daughter knows how to spin straw into gold, as far as you know. You can take her instead."
"Sounds like a good trade," Producer mused. "Alright, send her out."
Kotori went to go fetch Ritsuko, who went immediately to the carriage without any protesting. She was well aware of how the story went.
"OK, off we go. I'm gonna lock you in a room when we get there. Is that OK with you?" Producer asked.
"Fine, fine," Ritsuko insisted. "I don't mind one bit."
"Alright. You know, you have to be pregnant by the end of this story…"
Ritsuko was silent. Suddenly she lurched forwards, grabbed Producer by the collar of his shirt, and pulled him in close.
"Listen, you," she hissed, "I have way too much on my hands to worry about a real baby."
"Right, I—" Producer began.
"So don't you dare try anything, Mister!" Ritsuko finished. "…Unless you want to wake up in the morning with no arms."
Producer blinked. "R-right. I was just going to suggest you shove a pillow up your shirt."
Ritsuko sniffed and released him.
They arrived at the castle and Producer instantly locked Ritsuko in a room (partially because he was afraid of her) and left to go do king stuff.
Ritsuko picked up a straw and started trying to spin it into gold. Of course, this didn't work at all, so she decided to just sit there and wait for Rumpelstiltskin, AKA Hidaka Ai, to show up and help her. Soon enough, the small 876 idol showed up in her room and grinned.
"Sorry I'm late!" she greeted. "I'm Hidaka Ai, and I FIGHT FOR YOU!"
Ai was lectured and sent back.
Ritsuko offered a curt nod. "Right. In exchange for my first-born child, I plead with you to spin this straw into gold for me."
"Whoa, you're actually gonna have a real kid?" Ai gasped. "Do I actually get to keep it?"
"Of course not!" Ritsuko snapped. "Don't be ridiculous! Now, spin my straw!"
Ai, having been frightened by the "Demon General", instantly began working, and due to the use of CGI animation, there was soon a pile of gold in exchange for the straw that had been there before.
"There we go!" Ai cheered. "OK, now that that's done, I'm going home!"
Ai apparently vanished in a puff of pink smoke thanks to a green screen that the agencies couldn't afford.
Ritsuko was sitting back and admiring Ai's good work when Producer walked in.
"Wow, what do you know? You actually can spin straw into gold!" he gasped. Ritsuko smiled proudly and lifted her chin. "Hey, let's get married. And in the meantime, keep doing this or I'll kill you."
So it was that every day afterwards, Ai appeared in the room and was scared into spinning straw into gold for Ritsuko. Producer was impressed and the two of them got married. When Ritsuko was pregnant with her first child (meaning she had a pillow shoved up her shirt) Ai appeared to collect her reward.
"Hey, you know, that kid is rightfully mine," she told Ritsuko. "So hurry and give birth so you can hand it over!"
"This kid isn't going to be born for another three days," Ritsuko announced. "So come back then."
"OK." Ai paused. "Ain't ya gonna resist? I am taking your child, after all."
"I don't have time for babies. You can have it."
Ritsuko was ordered off-set, but she ignored the orders and continued acting while the presidents made wild hand gestures in the background.
"Um…well, y'know, if you wanna stop this, all you have to do is guess my name!" Ai cackled.
Ritsuko shrugged. "Fine. Return tomorrow and I'll guess. Right now I'm much too busy."
Ai blinked. "OK…" Thanks to the green screen, she vanished again into a puff of black smoke this time.
The next morning she returned. Ritsuko greeted her with another curt nod.
"I have come for your baby! If you want me to not take your baby tomorrow, then guess my name now!" she ordered.
Ai opened her mouth and closed it again. "I…no! I changed it!"
Ritsuko blinked. "Rumpelstiltskin."
"Hidaka 'Rumpelstiltskin' Ai."
"…OK fine! You win!" Ai pouted. "How'd you know?"
"You told me your name when we first met," Ritsuko sighed. "Plus I've read this story before."
Dejected, Ai hung her head and vanished in orange smoke thanks to the green screen (nobody seemed to mind that her whole body was covered in a green suit).
Ritsuko's "baby" was "born" without any problems, and her and Producer lived happily ever after.
And that was how the story of Ritsuko and King Producer ended.
"I told you to get off the set!" Takagi sighed. "Akizuki-kun. Just because you are a producer doesn't give you the right to defy my orders."
"I think I did a fantastic job," Ritsuko huffed. "My acting was fine. You were being picky." She headed off to get ready for the finale.
Producer shivered. "She scares me, actually…"
"She scares all of us," Ishikawa murmured.
"I'm not scared of anything," Kuroi bragged.
Takagi sighed. "Whatever, whatever! Aladdin cast, you're up!"
Takagi turned. "Yes, Ganaha-kun?"
"Am I still Snow White?" she asked.
"No, we changed you to Jasmine," Ishikawa answered. "We thought it would suit you better."
"An' Touma's Aladdin now, right?" Hibiki responded.
"Yes, that's what we decided," Takagi said.
"No problemo! I'll go out there an' do a kick-butt job, no doubt! Can't say the same 'bout Touma, but…" She smirked at Kuroi and headed off.
Kuroi glared after his former idol and observed the rest of the idols.
"Aladdin cast! Get out there!"