I do not own Remember the Titans or its characters/ ideas. This is my first fanfiction so please be kind and review.

Prologue

So they all thought I was gay. I guess there are worse things. They thought that long hair and being from California meant I was gay. Some asked, some just hinted but I merely smiled. If I was gay, which by the way I'm not, it wasn't any of their business.

The truth is as much as I liked the guys, I missed California. I missed waking up in our little house by the beach. I missed surfing, beach volleyball, and tai chi in the hot beach sun. I missed my friends. Things were so complicated and messy.

It has never mattered to me the color of one's skin. That's how I was raised. My parents always taught me that what mattered were ones actions and the content of their hearts.

I guess the thing that bugged me the most about being here in Alexandria was the fact that no one truly knew me. They didn't know how I thought or why I acted the way I did.

They didn't know that my mom was killed in Africa. They didn't know that because of my dad's job I had traveled all around the world with my dad. He had acted as an ambassador for the military for many years. They didn't know that I had 3 sisters, used to have 4. My eldest sister died the same day as my mom at the hand of natives in Africa. They didn't know that it completely shattered my heart when I found out that they died. I nearly died as well. Now it's just me, my dad, my older sister Susie, and my 2 younger sister's Payson and Vanessa. Susie was 19, Payson 14, and Vanessa 12.

I've been screwed up ever since their deaths. I pretend that I'm put together for my sisters and my dad. I know that he needs to have someone to rely on and since Susie started collage I've had to do a lot of stuff for my dad.

But what no one knows is that I'm cracking. I don't know how much more I can take. I'm depressed. I use drugs and alcohol to help with the days that it all seems like it's too much. But sooner or later I will crack and I don't think that there will be anyone there to help pick up the pieces.