Note: I decided to write a few alternate versions of this story for fun. Each is a separate oneshot.
Minga IS a Jedi
Minga stood before the Jedi Council a tad nervously as she had never been called before them before. In the brief message that she had received ordering her to come before them, she had been informed she would be given a special mission. She was clueless as to why she of all of the Jedi was chosen for this assignment. She thought she was average with no special skills. She worked hard, studied hard and tried to live up to the spotless reputation a proper Jedi should possess.
The Jedi Council sat on their cushions, the breathtaking view of Coruscant visible behind them. Master Mace pressed a button and a star chart filled the room. Quickly a distant planet Minga had never heard of was picked out and started to glow a brilliant blue. "You will go to this planet and visit an eldritch being there. He has strange powers and seems to know things. How he knows these things is unknown but his information has never been wrong. His name is Undertaker."
"Undertaker?" She repeated, thinking it was a very unusual name.
"We don't believe that's his real name but a cover." Master Mace added as he shifted to pick up some documents that had been resting on the floor next to his beige cushion. He held them out to her. "You'll need these."
She stepped forward, her blue eyes landing on the strange material. The top one contained a photo and to her shock it was of the Supreme Chancellor. Then her eyes grew wider as she realized he had been caught in a very compromising position. His rear seemed to be stuck in one of the waste containers in the Jedi Cafeteria, his thin body bent in half. His mouth was open wide as he yelled silently and his arms were waving about in the air. His legs seemed to be kicking. "But…"
"Yes, that's Chancellor Palpatine." Mace confirmed as if he had read her mind. "That happened a few years ago when a bunch of Younglings almost ran him over. He was knocked backward and got stuck in that trash can. Unfortunately, someone from the press caught the scene on camera. Hopefully it'll make Undertaker laugh."
"Make him laugh you must." Yoda told her. "Information he provide only for laughs."
Mace nodded his bald shiny head in agreement. "We have other funny photos here. Hopefully one will do the trick. We had them printed on paper because the planet where he lives is very primitive. You'll not to let anyone know you're from off world. Dress like they do and behave appropriately."
"What am I to ask him?"
"Ask him who the Sith Master is."
Minga sat on the closed coffin in Undertaker's shop. She munched on the bone cookie and drank the tea. Truthfully both were very good, better than she had ever expected. She was glad now that she hadn't followed the Council's orders to the exact letter. They had been strict with telling her to wear this, this and that but when she had tried it all on she could barely breathe. So she had left the too-tight corset off and wore her Jedi athletic bra instead. Without the corset strangling her, the dress was much more bearable. And so she sat in comfort on the coffin lid as she watched the strange silver haired man.
At the moment Undertaker was rolling around on the floor in hysterics. Streams of water leaked out of his unseen eyes and his body quivered. Loud laughter issued forth practically nonstop. Each time it seemed to be coming to an end he would look at one of the photos and it would start all over again.
Minga secretly felt relieved. Without the photos she feared her mission would have failed.
After what had seemed like hours, Undertaker got himself under control. He weakly climbed up onto his coffin and wiped his face with the long edge of his black sleeve. When he spoke his voice was incredibly horse. "What is it you want to know, my dear? I'll tell you anything, anything at all!"
"Who is the Sith Master?" Once the question left her lips, she waited with held breath. Would he really know?
"The Sith Master is the man in this photo: Supreme Chancellor Palpatine. He uses the name of Darth Sidious."
Minga gasped in horror at the words, a hand flying to her mouth. "No! It can't be!"
"But it is, my dear." Undertaker said with a smile of yellow teeth. "I just know these things…"
"I must leave at once!" Minga leaped off from the closed coffin and hurried out the door. Since her skirts were so long she had ditched the uncomfortable shoes for her regular Jedi boots. She moved with ease down the sidewalk as she made her way back towards her hidden Jedi Starfighter. She wanted to hurry so she could call the Council but didn't want to attract undue attention to herself.
The day rapidly grew dark and it was later than she had thought. Most of the time had been taken up with the creature's wild laughter. She duly noted the streets were almost empty now, the old-fashioned lights casting a yellow glow every so many feet. It was shocking to realize that actual fires burned within the glass globes atop the posts.
A man came around the corner ahead. He wore a brown overcoat and a cap pulled low over his head. A white hanky was in his hand and as she watched he raised it to his nose as if to use it. But when it got close to his nose, he seemed to sway backward and made an awful face.
Instantly Minga's nerves were on alert, her senses reaching outward with the Force. He continued to come close to her and when he was abreast, passing her by, he tried to shove the bit of white fabric under her nose. A horrible medicinal smell hit her in the face and she spun on her heel, turning. Her fist rose at Jedi speed and rammed into his chin. A shocked expression crossed his face then as he flew backward into the nearby brick building. His hat fell off to reveal shiny blonde hair. His eyes seemed to roll around and then he slumped on the sidewalk unconscious.
Minga left him lying there and continued on her way feeling pleased she had stopped a criminal. She should have used the Jedi Mind Trick on him possibly, but she was in a hurry. The identity of the Sith Master took priority over all.
Soon she was in the woods and quickly clambered up into the Jedi Starfighter. Ordering the astrotech droid to connect her to the Jedi Council she waited anxiously.
A moment later Master Mace's dark face appeared in blue hologram.
"Did you get the information from Undertaker?"
"Yes! He said it was Chancellor Palpatine!"
Mace nodded glumly. "That makes sense. It explains why the Senate is acting as if under control of the Sith and why we're being blocked. Excellent work, Minga. We'll handle it from here."
Minga sighed with relief. She reached into the cockpit and pulled out her regular clothing. She would change before heading home but she would keep the dress as a reminder of the day she had helped save the entire Jedi Order from the grips of the Sith Master.