Note: I do not own Mass Effect, I'm just playing with Bioware's toys.


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Name: Commander Shepard

Class: Soldier

History: Spacer, War Hero

Personality: Paragon


She stood outside of the hospital room for a long time, just staring at the closed door. She was sure she looked pathetic- lost- just staring. She had seen him only a half an hour earlier...but, somehow, just thinking of seeing him laying on a hospital bed- in a real hospital- was worse.

She had seen him laying on a bed in here infirmary. Sometimes from an injury from a mission- mostly because of migraines. She also knew that he would pull through.

"Can I help you, ma'am?" a perky voice asked, causing her to jump. "Are you here to see a patient?"

Shepard tilted her head a little, studying the woman before her. Something was familiar about her. She was short- probably about 5 foot 3 inches, or so. She had long brown hair hat was tied back into a pony tail, a nice tan, even features, and green eyes. Shepard didn't recall ever meeting her.

"Yeah," she managed, trying not to play with the hat that she had just bought- just so she could avoid unwanted attention. "I'm here to see Major Kaidan Alenko." She looked back to the closed door.

The woman nodded. "He's just in there, but he hasn't woke up yet."

Keeping her expression neutral, Shepard asked, "How is he? I know he took quite a beating."

"He's lucky he was on such a fast ship. It was pretty touch-and-go, but we managed to stabilize him. Right now, he's in an induced coma." Shepard must have made an involuntary sound because the doctor looked at her sympathetically. "Don't worry, we induced it to give his body time to heal. We'll probably wake him up in a few days."

Silently scolding herself, Shepard asked, "So he's going to be okay?"

The doctor nodded with a small smile. "He'll have to stay here for a while. He's pretty banged up- multiple breaks and fractures. Kaidan will have a few more scars, but he'll be back in fighting shape in no time."

Shepard raised her eyebrows at the doctor calling him "Kaidan" as opposed to "Major" or "Alenko." The doctor blushed and looked down at her datapad. "I'll probably be back with more questions after I see him."

"That's fine. Let me know if there're any problems."

Shepard looked back to the door and took a deep breath. Now, damn it, you have fought Geth, got in the face of an angry Krogan, died, fought Collectors, and fought a damn Thresher Maw- on foot, no less! You are Commander Shepard, the biggest badass in space! You can go into a hospital room and check on your boyfriend...ex-boyfriend...friend...team mate...whatever.

Straightening her back and raising her head, she marched into the hospital room and stumbled when she looked at Kaidan. She felt the uncried tears threaten, but she choked them back. She had just seem him half an hour (she checked her omni-tool)- okay, an hour ago. He looked horrible. The marks she hadn't seen on his chest because of his armor, glared obviously.

"Kaidan," she whispered, walking over to the bed to take his hand. "That...it should be me in that bed. I should have been the one to check the shuttle...not you."

She sat down on the edge of his bed and ran her free hand gently down his cheek. "There hasn't been enough time. We haven't gotten to talk about anything. I don't even know where we stand with each other."

Lifting the hand she held to her cheek, she pressed lightly into the warmth. With his hand to his cheek, she found it comical that any merc or criminal could find her intimidating. She was so much smaller than Kaidan (let alone James).

"I never told you something, Kaidan. Not before...not before I was gone, and not since. I loved you..love- I love you, Kaidan."

Standing and gently laying his hand back on his bed, she leaned over and pressed a light kiss to his forehead. "Get better, Kaidan. We need you...I need you."

Shepard walked from the room and leaned against the wall just outside of his room. She wouldn't cry- it was unprofessional-...okay, she wouldn't cry in public. Once she got back on the Normandy, in her quarters, all bets were off.

She straightened her hat and went to find the pretty doctor that she had talked to. She had a few questions for her.