Host It Space Ghost
Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: This isn't the first fanfic I wrote involving Wreck It Ralph. That honor goes to Yoshi Kart (like anyone actually cares, cause I don't). But this is the first one to properly involve him… somehow. It's a crossover of Wreck It Ralph and Space Ghost, what do you expect? Enjoy.
Space Ghost, Moltar, and Zorak were sitting at their table in the cafeteria, drinking their drinks as usual as they waited for the show to start up.
"So, any of you guys see Wreck It Ralph?" Space Ghost asked, rubbing his cup of joe.
Moltar sipped his drink, turning to Space Ghost. "Don't you mean… Slam It Jam?"
Space Ghost shook his head. "No, Wreck It Ralph. It just came out last week."
Zorak scoffed as he narrowed his eyes. "Like I want to see References The Movie."
"Implying it's even like that at all." Space Ghost and Moltar both retorted in unison, staring at Zorak.
Zorak's eyes widened as he shook his head, going from his normal blue green to dark brownish green. "Well, you have seen all the commercials for it!"
Space Ghost pointed at Zorak with his right arm. "Yes, but it's only for the first twenty minutes or so. Besides, the cameos actually have some influence on the story."
"Well, I still don't care." Zorak replied as he rolled his eyes.
Moltar patted Zorak on the right shoulder. "Zorak, chill. Dang It Bobby was a good film."
"…Dang It Bobby?" Space Ghost and Zorak quipped in unison, confused by Moltar's joke.
Moltar rubbed the back of his head sheepishly with his right hand. "Err… I like making jokes about the title."
"Everyone does." Space Ghost commented as he smiled, sipping his drink.
Suddenly, Brak walked by, yapping off his head as usual. "HEY GUYS DID YOU SEE DEMOLISH IT DAN IT WAS A GOOD MOVIE I LIKED THE RUSHING SUGAR IT WAS SO GOOD AND FUN AND GIRLY AND I LIKE THAT KINDA STUFF-"
Space Ghost groaned as he placed his right hand on his face, sighing. "Why was Brak allowed back in again?"
Space Ghost teleported to the main set, waving as he introduced himself. "Greetings, viewers! I am Space Ghost! Welcome back to the show!"
"Even though nobody watches us anymore." Zorak commented, sitting in his prison pad.
Space Ghost shook his head at Zorak. "But we still have new episodes, just like this one! Right Moltar?" He turned to Moltar, frowning as he waited for an answer. "…Right? …Moltar?"
Moltar coughed as he pushed the lever up. "Uhhh… yeah. New episodes. Got it."
"Even though said new episodes are just stupid bumpers, or worse, boring fanfiction like this," Zorak commented.
Space Ghost blasted Zorak with his destructo ray. "Shut your trap, bug! If I wanted to be depressed, I'll do it myself!"
Zorak coughed as he growled, covered in ashes.
Space Ghost teleported to his desk, sitting down as he waved his right hand. "Anyway, we wasted enough time. Let's get down to business, to defeat the huns!" He paused for a moment, clearing his throat. "I mean, let's get our special Wreck It Ralph interviews! Starting with King Candy!"
The orange monitor lowered down as the image was static, before being shot inside King Candy's castle, revealing King Candy, who was sitting on his red throne. He screamed as he fell off the throne, being caught by surprise.
"Whoa! Who dares interrupt the King of Sugar Rush while on his rest?" King Candy exclaimed, getting into a fighting pose as he was ready to punch out some candy.
Space Ghost waved at King Candy, saying to him, "Sorry for my interruptions, oh great King Candy, but I am Space Ghost, and you're on live!"
King Candy had a concerned look on his face, staring oddly at Space Ghost. "What? You… you're not a game? And you're media jumping?"
Space Ghost coughed as he flexed his muscles. "Well, not really. I just want to interview you-"
King Candy shook his arms, flailing about as he angrily exclaimed, "Be gone, vile white ghost man! You're going to threaten the fabric of the space time continuum! Go, before I go turbotastic on you!" He briefly glitched, revealing his original Turbo look.
Space Ghost murmured as he zapped the screen, causing it to fizzle again as he turned to Moltar. "All right, that didn't work, Moltar. Send in Wreck It Ralph."
Moltar sighed as he shifted the lever up and down. "Fine, whatever."
As the screen stopped fizzling, Wreck It Ralph appeared on the screen, standing on the top of the rooftop of the nicelanders' penthouse. He waved, spotting Space Ghost. "Oh hey, I recognize you! You're that washed up superhero from the 60's!"
Space Ghost chuckled as he shook his head. "Oh, Ralph, you know how to flatter me." He rolled his left hand. "Welcome to my show, Ralph! Are you getting enough oxygen?"
Ralph laughed as he slapped his stomach several times with his right hand. "You bet I am, Tad! I wreck oxygen!"
Space Ghost laughed along as he nodded his head. "Good, good! Anything recent going on?"
Ralph placed his giant wrecking hands on his hips. "Well, I'm going to be part of a new racing completion with Sonic soon, so I have been practicing in Sugar Rush with my good friend Vanellope while taking a break from doing my job."
"Have those lessons been paying off?" Space Ghost asked again as he turned to the camera, smiling widely.
Ralph laughed as he bent forward a bit, shaking his head. "Oh yes, definitely! I'm still new to this whole racing thing, considering I wasn't originally programmed for it, but I'm up and at 'em when it comes to the time!"
Space Ghost chuckled proudly as he moved his arms about. "That's the spirit, Ralph! Never give up!" He looked up at the ceiling, sighing. "That's… what I should keep doing. Not give up. Soon, they'll be forced to remember my show…"
Several seconds of awkward silence passed, with Space Ghost looking back at Ralph, who was rubbing the back of his head with his right hand.
"Anyway, sorry to trail off. Have you any words for the universe?" Space Ghost insisted, foldhing his arms.
Ralph placed his hands on his hips again briefly. "Yes, I do, actually." He cleared his throat as he folded his arms. "Love what you do, appreciate it and stick through it. All in all, as long as you make someone happy, how bad can it be?"
Space Ghost clapped as he started dripping tears of joy. "A wonderful send off, Ralph. Thank you."
"Thank you, Tad Ghostal!" Ralph thanked as he waved goodbye with a smile, the screen fizzling.
Space Ghost glanced back at Zorak, the tears gone from his face. "You see, Zorak? You could learn a thing or two from Ralph. A fellow villain should go with the advice from another fellow villain!"
Zorak snarled at Space Ghost as he was playing Tetris on his gray Game Boy. "Oh, go blast yourself, butthead!"
Space Ghost blasted Zorak again, reducing him to nothing but ashes as he turned to Moltar. "Surely you appreciate the message Ralph was passing, right?"
Moltar shook his head. "I can certainly understand the angle he was going for."
"…Right." Space Ghost mumbled as he tapped his blue card three times. "We'll be right back, ladies and gentlemen."
Space Ghost tapped his blue card with his left hand twice as he looked into the camera directly. "We're back, my fellow watchers. And we have one more guest for tonight's show!"
"…That won't be broadcast," Zorak muttered as he laughed.
Space Ghost walked over to Zorak, punching him in the face as he walked back to his desk, sitting down. "God, I hate this friggin' mantis."
Zorak groaned in pain as his right leg twitched.
"Anyway, send in the guest!" Space Ghost exclaimed as he smiled with innocence.
Moltar sighed as he bopped his head. "All right, if you say so." He moved the lever up.
The screen fizzled, revealing the vibrant and lively Sugar Rush in the background, with Vanellope Von Schweetz standing in the middle, staring right at Space Ghost.
"And what a nice hello to you, young Vanellope!" Space Ghost greeted as he moved his arms about.
Vanellope giggled as she pointed at Space Ghost. "You look funny, Mr. Man In Sheet!"
"Man In Sheet?" Space Ghost exclaimed, getting infuriated as he raised his right arm, pointing at Vanellope, "Don't make me use this, young girl! I mean big business!"
Vanellope blew a raspberry as she started to laugh. Space Ghost growled as he shook his head.
"Not that kind of business!" Space Ghost retorted, folding his arms.
Vanellope wiped her right arm as she was catching her breath from all her laughter. "Yeah, you should save that for the potty!"
Space Ghost murmured as he was getting slightly ticked. "Listen, kid, cut the crap. This is a serious talk show-"
Vanellope farted loudly, the tuba like noise echoing throughout the entire studio from the screen. Space Ghost was left speechless, as were Moltar and Zorak, who gave each other odd looks as they turned back to Space Ghost.
"I said cut the crap, not cut the cheese!" Space Ghost exclaimed as he frantically waved the air with his right hand, somehow smelling the flatulence through the screen. "Phoowee! This smells worse than the writing on Cartoon Planet!"
Vanellope placed both of her hands inside her green pouch, sticking her tongue out. "Just because I live in a land of sweets doesn't mean I'm entirely sweet!"
"I'll say! Your gas is like rotten eggs to my senses!" Space Ghost exclaimed as he coughed, the awful odor causing him to get a headache. "Pee yew!"
Vanellope winked with her right eye as she giggled again. "Personally, I like my farts being gross, thank you very much! The sulfur like stench turns me on!" She laughed as she placed both of her hands on her stomach, laughing to her hearts' content as she briefly glitched.
Moltar was just standing in the control room, thankful that he wasn't able to smell as good as Space Ghost. "You know, being a man in a robotic magma suit isn't a bad deal right about now."
Zorak scoffed as he shook his head, once again changing his colors from normal bluish green to dark brown green. "He could barely qualify as a terrible super hero, but now he can't even stomach some eggy farts? Some talk show host!"
"Don't make me blast you, Zorak!" Space Ghost threatened, the stench of Vanellope's fart being strong enough to make him unable to raise his blaster. "Ugh! This is terrible! Crack open a window, will ya?"
Vanellope folded her arms as she stopped laughing. "As much as I would like to continue letting out loud smelly farts, I wanna get interviewed! So stomach it, butthead!"
"…Butthead…?" Space Ghost muttered, angrily turning his head slowly to the screen. "Butthead? You're the one who's making me suffer smelling this god awful gas, you nasty little pincushion!"
Suddenly out of nowhere, Sonic The Hedgehog zipped into the studio from the western direction, slapping Space Ghost across the face while wagging his right index finger. "Only I'm allowed to be referred to that, Tad Ghostal! Using it on other beings is disrespectful, and that's no good!" He then zipped away.
Space Ghost was able to get the stench out of his mind, leaving him to thank Sonic as he shook his head. "Wow! A slap was all I needed to get back to normal! I should write that down!"
"Yes, I would love to beat the hell out of you," Zorak chuckled as he rubbed his yellow gloved hands together.
Space Ghost gave Zorak a glare as he turned back to Vanellope. "All right, enough BSing around. Let's get to the interview at long last!"
Silence. Space Ghost tapped his blue card several times as Vanellope yawned.
"So, uh, you were originally part of Sugar Rush, but got hijacked by Turbo, which caused you to become a glitch," Space Ghost commented as he looked at his card, then glancing back up at Vanellope. "How were all those years being treated terribly?"
Vanellope shrugged as she placed her hands inside her green pouch again. "Well, it was pretty meh. It was depressing that I was all alone and that no one gave me any chances because of my glitchiness, but I had to storm it out until that fateful day I met old stink breath."
"You know, you really should call people by their proper names," Space Ghost insisted as he flexed his muscles again, "Because in the long run, it'll save you."
Vanellope stuck out her tongue as she shook her head. "I don't really care. All I wanna do is have fun and be adorable!"
"So you do that by racing all day every day?" Space Ghost replied as he continued tapping his card.
Vanellope nodded as she jumped into the air, twirling as she landed back on the yellow road. "Not every day, but whenever I'm on the roster, I always get picked!"
"Gee, I wonder why…" Zorak muttered, briefly glancing over his magazine about sugary sweets.
Space Ghost waved his right hand at Vanellope. "Well, I love to continue this intruiging conversation, but we're out of time! It was nice talking to you, booger face!"
"The hypocrisy runs well throughout the studio," Moltar muttered to himself as he chuckled.
Space Ghost blasted both Moltar and Zorak with his destructo ray, turning to Vanellope one last time. "What did you think of the power of my trusty destructo ray, President Vanellope?"
Vanellope folded her arms as she rolled her eyes, scoffing Space Ghost. "Pfft. My hiccups are stronger than that."
Space Ghost stared right at Vanellope. "So be it." He then blasted the screen with his destructo ray, causing it to explode. It fell on the ground, causing it to catch on fire as the entire studio was set on fire. Space Ghost turned to the camera, holding his hands together. "Good night, everyone."