I didn't go near Jadey today, she was still upset because Tori got the lead in the play she wanted to star in. I tried to comfort her after a while but she was being mean, I do hope she doesn't hate me.

Drake is being weirder than usual and he got shot by two clowns this time, I wonder what's going on. Everyone's acting strange, why am I being blocked out?

Daddy hit me again, I tried not to cry, he so hates it when I cry and Jadey I says I have to be stronger, so I just clung to Mr. Purple. I just dropped one dish, I don't even know what I did wrong, I don't deserve to be hit for that, do I?

I called Jade and she's opening up a bit, but it will take forever since she's hard on the outside. I wonder if she's gooey on the inside... like, like roasted marshmallows! I love roasted marshmallows, one time, when I was roasting a marshmallow it fell right into the fire and Drake tried to grab it again and burned his hand. He's okay. Physically, I mean. He's seriously messed up.

Mummy's in a bad mood again so I'm trying to be extra, super helpfull and nice, yet, she started yelling mean words, which I can't write because they're so foul. The type of word Jadey uses when she's mad. I do wonder what's up with Jade, she says it's family stuff. She once told her father hit her. Is that one of the things we have in common? We both get hit?

I want to play outside but mummy doesn't want me going outside in the rain, she wants me to stay in my room. I like my room, it's pink and... and well, lovely. Jadey says it's too girly, just because she likes dark stuff, not pink, girly stuff. I don't mind though, I love pink, pretty, girly stuff. Mr. Purple likes it too, he tells me it looks beautiful. He's ever so sweet, not like anyone else in my family. No. That's not true. My brother, Drake, is lovely, when he doesn't wear my bras, that's just weird. Boys don't wear bras! That's like, like Jadey wearing a pink dress!

Mummy's yelling again, she's saying more rude words. Daddy's yelling back and I can hear him slap her. I hate him slapping mummy. It's not fair.

Wait. A door just slammed. What's that supposed to mean!? They said I couldn't go outside! Why do they get to leave?

Oh, wait, I just heard daddy talking to Drake, but I can't hear mummy, she's probably gone to get her special drink. She loves her special drink, I love it too. Not drinking it, I'm not allowed, but seeing the effect on mummy. It makes her all happy and giddy and nice to me. It's like when I have too much bibble. I love bibble, but I'm not allowed to have it, in fact, I've been banned completly.

No, seriously, daddy called every store nation wide and they're not allowed to sell me, Caterina Hannah Valentine, any bibble, unless they want to get arrested or something like that. Robbie sneaks me some from time, but it's never enough and it's not even near what Mason bought me, though in defense, Mason did buy me a wagon full. Anyways, if Jade caught me with bibble, she'd had a fit. Like that time I accidently shaved her eyebrows off, I told her it was an accident but she still shaved my head.

Jade's bipolar, Beck told me we're both bipolar, so that's another thing we have in common, but Beck said we were bipolar in different ways, I don't know what it means though, and he wouldn't explain properly, he just said we were special.

Special. Isn't that nice? I like being special, and Jade's special too! I tried telling her but she said I shouldn't say dirtyword dirtyword things. She's really nice once you get to know her though, though she crumbles a lot, but I crumble even more! Like the cookie I found in my pocket last week, crumble, crumble, crumble.

I'm going to have dinner, hopefully mummy will be back by now.

Love,

Cat Valentine.