Author's Note: I am so very sorry for the long wait. I've been sick since January and was unable to update. I just started getting better this month though I am still somewhat sick but I'm hoping it will go away with some consistent, warm weather. Because of long wait, I feel obligated to update a bit quickly in the next month so be sure to stick around and look for these updates.
Warning: Aizen x Gin. Language. Violence.
Chapter Three: Devil's Dance
He was gone. My blank expression changed to one of sorrow. Normally I would be smirking, taunting my enemy, enticing them to fall deeper into intense hatred until they drowned in it and were felled by my blade. This was not the case at the moment. I could not bring myself to smirk in pleasure or frown in agitation. My lips were pressed, my eyebrows furrowed, my own eyes burning with sadness.
I turned, raising Kyouka Suigetsu. The clang of metal reached my ears which surprised me as numb as I felt. He was in front of me now, blue eyes open and fiery. His arm trembled as his zanpakuto scraped against mine, a spray orange sparks coming dangerously close to our faces. His mouth was open. He was screaming at me. I vaguely heard him.
"...you selfish prick! You wounded the person closest to my heart! I-I can never care for anyone without fear that because I am close to them, they'll be killed! I hate you, Sosuke Aizen! Do you hear me?!"
Sosuke, make him listen to you. Make him hear you out.
"I hate you!" Gin screamed at me. "I'd drive my zanapakuto through your heart if you had one!"
I listened intently. He was not incorrect. My heart had disappeared with the betrayal I experienced earlier in my life but somehow, I had brought myself to care for him. To love him. Did he not see that?
"Gin, please hear me out." What more can I ask for? I apparently hurt him. I can't ask for anything more.
My beloved narrowed his eyes to slits, a small shimmer of blue just barely visible, glaring at me. Piercing me. "Why the hell should I hear you out, Sosuke Aizen? You've done enough to me. You definitely are the most selfish bastard in existence. You only...you only care for what's in your best interests, chasing after your dreams which involve the bloodshed of the innocent!"
"I will not deny the truth, Gin. I do chase after my dreams but only because I think of you when I do." My tone was icy.
"Like hell you do!" He spat at me, applying more pressure with his zanpakutou, forcing Kyouka Suigetsu closer to my chest.
I pushed back defiantly. "I do. I care about you."
Gin cackled out a hiss. "I'm sure you do. Now, shoot to ki-!"
I wasn't going to let him kill me. At least, not until he heard what I really had to say. My grip loosened on Kyouka Suigetsu and I let it clatter to the floor. Surprised, Gin lost his balance, a rookie mistake due to his rage, and started to fall against me. Shinso went with him as well, sliding forward and slicing through my side. I cared not.
Don't let him go, Sosuke. You love him. Make him listen to you.
"Listen to me, damn it!" I grabbed his wrists tightly as he yelled, shrieking in surprise. We fell to the floor almost too slow for it to seem real. I landed solidly on my back, my head smacking into the ground with a near sickening crack. Gin was on top, attempting to support himself on his forearms, panting heavily with shock. I was aware he was straddling me as well.
"Aizen..." He trailed off and tried to pull free.
I shook my head even though I could feel a dull ache beginning to throb. "Gin, listen. You are the only person I truly care about. Everything that I do, I always had you in mind. When I made you my lieutenant, I wanted to be close to you because you made me feel strange. I wanted to know you better and why you made me feel like that."
Gin had closed his eyes, shaking his head in denial. I continued on with Kyouka Suigetsu's encouragement.
"Indeed, I do chase my dreams. I am selfish. But only because I want you to be mine. Coming here, we're away from the eyes of the soul reapers. They will never understand me, Gin. I want to believe...that you do. That somehow, even in your current rage, that you understand why I do certain things that seem crazy, even psychotic. I want to achieve a status where I can be with you and no one will care or be able to stop us. I want you in my life, Gin. I want you."
"No..." Gin shook his eyes, his fringe falling in his face, hiding it. "Not like this. You hurt...you hurt her."
I closed my eyes. The pain in the back of my head was becoming progressively worse. "Rangiku Matsumoto. Gin, I assure you, I honestly had no idea that she was your close childhood friend. If I had known that, I wouldn't have taken her spirit energy because I wouldn't have wanted to hurt you. Gin, please believe me."
My fox looked down me with beautiful open eyes despite some minor blood spatter on his face. His lips were set in a firm line as he thought about what I said. I could only hope that he believed me. It was the truth. The only truth that exists. I reached up slowly, cautiously, my fingertips barely brushing his cheek as he lifted his sword. He did not believe me.
He didn't love me.
I locked eyes with him, waiting. But the longer I watched, the more I couldn't understand. His arm was raised, Shinso pointing down at me, but his grip was lose, wavering. His eyebrows were furrowed and his lips slightly parted. I furrowed my own eyebrows at him, sure I had read his intentions clearly a moment ago. Had he changed his mind? Did I look too pathetic to kill? My mind started swarming with thoughts that I couldn't control. Gin's image above me started to blur.
"Sosuke?" My own name seemed foreign to me, barely reaching my mind. Did he just say my name?
I finally started to notice a pooling wetness around my head before blackness overtook me.
Again, I sincerely apologize for not updating this! I just really wasn't up to writing while extremely sick but I did read all of the reviews and I'm so happy that you all like the story so far. Of course, that makes me feel a little worse since I know that some of you have been waiting a very long time for this chapter so in return, I plan on producing another chapter shortly. :)
Note: There will be an explanation in the following chapter as to why Aizen so easily passed out from hitting his head.
I hope you guys liked this chapter despite the fact that I left it off with another cliffhanger. xD And I know that the fighting scene is a little on the short side but Aizen is reluctant to even remotely injure Gin and would rather try and talk it out with him. He's such a lovesick sap, ne?