"Thorne, you need a girlfriend!"

Time suddenly stood still. Thorne blinked and looked up from the red and green-armored Attacker and across at the Australian bird who had spoke.

"What did you just say?" he asked.

"You need a girlfriend!" Kookaburra repeated from behind the Splatzooka, a smug smile on his face.

Thorne growled at the bird. "No, I don't need a girlfriend!"

Ballista looked over at the bird from the side of the Beastly Battle Axes. "Yeah, Kook, what are you thinking? If he had a girlfriend, they'd live unhappily ever after!"

Kook laughed, and Thorne felt a bit of anger in the pit of his stomach.

"Good one Ballista!" Kook complimented.

Thorne muttered something about dunking the bird in the moat under his breath, then turned his attention back to the Attacker, who was now making his way across the Mace Roll. Thorne slammed his hand down hard on the wall surrounding the Water Cannon when he made it perfectly across.

"Now look what you've done!" the alchemist roared.

Ballista groaned, then slimed the Attacker as he made his way done the Impossible Incline. She and Kook laughed at him when he fell into the moat. Kook looked back at Thorne as the Attacker began climbing up the Callous Column.

"Thorne, why not make Crocness your girlfriend? You two would be perfect together!"

Thorne growled. "Says the bird who danced for my sister!"

Ballista laughed, and Kook's face turned red. The bird clamped his mouth shut, then turned back to the Attacker, who was now making his way across the Beastly Battle Axes.

Kook said no more about Thorne getting a girlfriend for the rest of the round, but thye alchemist was unable to forget the bird's most recent comment. He and Crocness? Together? No, that wouldn't work...would it?

Thorne turned on the Water Cannon as the Attacker began crossing the Rope Bridge of Disaster. He cackled loudly as the Attacker fell into the murky water.

While the Attacker was busy climbing back up the second Callous Column, Thorne looked down into the moat and thoughtfully pondered the idea. He and Crocness together?


A/N: Hey, guys, I need some advice: should I do a Doctor Who and Splatalot crossover, a story that involves the Defenders being recruited to defend another military camp/base/castle, or something else? I need some help thinking of new material. If you could, please let me know what you think.

By the way, I got the "unhapilly ever after" thing from Ballista's Facebook page.

Alright, thanks for reading!