Please read the A/N first.
A/N: So this is a collection of really short oneshots set in the same verse that I'll be posting in chronological order. The problem is that I have no beginning written for this. The short introduction in the summary is it. I've decided to keep the origin of the kids' de-aging a mystery for now, but I intend to revisit it later on. I know I'm a terrible person for purposely confusing people like this, but I'll make up for it! See bottom A/N marked with * for details.
Midgard was one of the last places he wanted to stay, but Loki was committed to threatening the realm on a regular basis by then. He would've preferred nearly anywhere else, but all the other realms were ruled out, and he couldn't exactly leave his children in one realm while he teleported to Midgard to bother the Avengers. Asgard and its affiliated realms were out for obvious reasons, the Jotnar would likely kill him on the spot, and Niflheim and Muspellheim were no places for young children. The only logical decision was to stay put on Midgard. He even decided to move to New York, the city where the Avengers live, to add to his glee and to save him time in case there was ever an emergency.
Being a sorcerer, it was a simple matter for him to set up the living situation. His new landlord felt compelled to inform him of all the necessities of Midgardian child-rearing and his previous experiences allowed him to spell one of the strange currency vending machines to unload all its paper wealth into his pocket-realm. A nice, three-bedroom, furnished apartment became his own and his new landlord left with a portion of the paper currency. The rest was to be used for shopping and other needs.
Besides things like clothes and books and other Midgardian entertainment, his children would require an unheard of amount of documentation, it seemed. Loki settled it all by compelling a librarian to explain to him all the different kinds of paperwork he would be required to have and then spelling his children into the system through one of the strange computer-machines. After seeing an example of the forms he was supposed to own he conjured his own copies, all with the correct names and information on the paper. He chose, smirking all the while, the surname Blake for his children and himself, after the alias Thor used during his banishment. His new name was Lukas, and his children were newly dubbed Helena, Fenn, and Mandel. Jormangund's name was a bit of a stretch but Loki was too unfamiliar with Midgard to attempt something resembling his eldest son's name.
When Hela and the two boys began to get a bit restless and ran about the library (Loki carefully enchanted them so that they would stay in Aesir shape, but his children were difficult and it manifested in Hela's single mahogany iris, Fenrir's fur-hair, and Jormangund's fangs) the dazed librarian mentioned something about a babysitter. And so, Loki found out about the numerous young women who apparently earned money by watching the children of other people. This appealed to him greatly, mostly because Fenrir was attempting to tie his shoelaces together and Hela was standing on Jormangund's shoulders to add the finishing touch to their book tower.
He found the number for Shannon pinned to the strangely-soft wooden board in the entryway of the library that was also littered with other papers. A short transaction of fees later and he left the young woman and his children at the apartment and wandered off to do some thinking.
He had plans for Midgard and his brother, and every intention of following through with them. He also had three children, now, and a second chance away from the Allfather that he wasn't going to throw away. These two things might be able to coexist but it wasn't going to be easy. He was not even a day into attempting this business of being a parent and already he was exhausted, his funds were running a little low, and he had yet to enroll his children in what these Midgardians called school.
When Loki returned from his visits to the local kindergarten, preschool, grocery store, and Avengers Tower (switching the salt and sugar before Stark's marvelous Jarvis-computer-voice-intelligence-thing could detect his presence was a bit of stress relief), it was to see Fenrir and Hela - no, Helena and Fenn - asleep on the couch while Shannon and Jorm... Mandel scribbled with a rainbow of pencils.
"Welcome back, Mr. Blake," said Shannon. "Do you need help getting the little ones into bed?"
"No, thank you, Miss Shannon," he told the Midgardian girl he couldn't bring himself to hate at that moment. He handed her the agreed-upon amount of currency as payment and was surprised when she didn't leave immediately, instead helping Mandel finish his picture and cleaning up the multi-colored pencils before saying her good-byes.
He found himself debating if it was so bad that he was incapable of hating just one Midgardian out of the billions that populated the planet.
A/N: (In case you were wondering, JARVIS didn't tell anyone about Loki's trick because no one asked. Thor, Clint, and Bruce are the only ones who take suger with their coffee/tea and their morning cup of caffeine was ruined. Clint sulked, Thor guzzled down three cups of joe anyway, and Bruce was very close to Hulking out until Natasha set the jar of honey down in front of him. Tony was openly amused at their predicament and smug with his mug of black coffee, and though he would never admit it, so was Steve.)
This is entirely unbetaed, so if you want to leave a review telling me of any mistakes you catch, I'll love you forever.
* To make up for my aforementioned awfulness, and since it will actually work with this collection of short fics, I'm taking requests. You might want to wait until after the second chapter is posted just to get a feel for the 'verse, but after that just drop me a review or a PM with a scene or something you'd like to see. If you can try and limit them to gen requests, I'd appreciate it. I didn't plan for any pairings so yeah, just gen, I guess. Sorry!
Hope you enjoyed, tune in next time for the First Day of School!