Disclaimer I do not own Spooks. Kudos and BBC own all. Seeing as my current story isn't going too well I thought I'd try this. Set in series 4 just after The British Way.

Finding the Way

Harry ran a hand over his face as he looked out over the Grid. Adam and Ruth were back in one piece, which was more than he had any right to expect. He had no idea what would happen to The British Way now but he knew they were much less of a threat than they were a few weeks ago. Sighing heavily he knew he would have to talk to Juliet at some point before he went home that evening. The one saving grace was that he had been right. The extremists had to be seen to implode themselves. Shaking his head he stood and walked towards his office doorway, knowing the rest of the team were still there.


"You hit him with what?" Colin turned to Ruth who turned a shade of scarlet Adam believed wasn't humanly possible.

"A tree branch." Ruth muttered as she looked towards Harry's office, aware that he was watching her. She looked away again when Adam began elaborating on the story. "If it wasn't for Ruth I'd have one Hell of a migraine right now."

"No." Fiona looked him in the eye. "If it wasn't for Ruth I'd be explaining to Wes why Daddy isn't coming home anymore." She got to her feet and stormed out of the Grid as Colin and Malcolm exchanged glances. Ruth stared at the desk top wishing it would swallow her whole. Zaf nudged Adam's leg. Adam closed his eyes, he knew Fiona was right, but it was a possibilty he hadn't let himself think about.


"No, no Fiona's right. Ruth, I should have said thank you. That thug would have shot me with that cross bow." Adam watched as Ruth bit her bottom lip, her eyes filling with tears.

"Any of the others would have done it." She mumbled. "Go after her."

"I will." Adam sighed as he looked towards the doors of the Pods. "I will." Seconds later he was out the doors looking for his wife. He had no idea she had been so upset but he had to talk to her.


The Grid was mostly dark by the time Harry got back from Whitehall. One solitary desk lamp remained lit next to the abandoned computer. Sighing heavily he walked towards his office knowing which one of his team had stayed so much later than the others. He stopped abruptly when he realised Ruth was no where to be seen.

"Ruth?" He turned looking out over the Grid knowing she would never have left the Grid with her computer still on. He stepped back towards her desk as he spotted her handbag on the floor by the desk. "Ruth?" He looked around the Grid, knowing she had to be somewhere.

"Ruth?" He smiled slightly as he heard a glass break and a distinctly female voice swear. He headed towards the small kitchenette on the periphery of the Grid, knowing Ruth would be there trying to clean up whatever bit of crockery had succumb to her clumsiness this time. "I thought I'd told you to go home."

"People died, Harry." She swore again as she picked up the broken cup.

"What is it?" Harry's voice dropped as he saw the trickle of blood run from the palm of her hand.

"I'm fine." She snapped.


"What?" She turned to face him. "I am not a field officer. You know that. You hired me. I was never supposed to go out in the field."

"I know."

"ISIS is dead. How many years had she been a field agent? Ten? Twenty and she is still dead. Murdered because we got her involved in this op. You didn't see what those monsters did to her. I found her body, Harry. It makes me sick."

"Ruth, May knew the risks. She was a field operative for ten years then a sleeper agent for thirty." Harry took her hand as Ruth closed her eyes. Her anger abating slightly at his touch. "How's Fiona? She seemed more affected by this than any of the others."

"She almost lost her husband and she had to face that slime ball every day. I think I'd be affected by that."

"You had to face Moran."

"I had Adam with me." Ruth turned away. Harry sighed heavily as he walked towards her, closing the small gap between them.

"He said you did brilliantly."

"I was terrified." Ruth took a deep breath. "I am not Zoe or Fiona. I am not a field officer. I don't do well with legends and lying. I am a terrible liar."

"Ruth, you saved Adam's life." He silenced her with a look before she was able to continue. "And I know Fiona and Wes will always be grateful to you for that. I know I am." He reached around her and turned on the cold tap. Ruth closed her eyes as she felt him take her hand and hold the small wound under the cold tap.


"This is nasty." He examined the cut as she opened her eyes.


"Ruth, you survive having a knife held to your throat. You survived having been chased through a forest by a madman with a crossbow and then you get hurt dropping a mug in the kitchen." He smiled at her. "How do you do it?"

"Natural talent." Ruth shrugged her shoulders, unable to drag her eyes away from his. "Is it really that bad?"

"Nothing a sticking plaster can't fix." He held Ruth's gaze as she bit her bottom lip.

"Oh ok."

"If only everything could be solved so easily." She held his gaze as she spoke.

"Very true." He smiled at her as the heat in the room seemed to crank up to almost unbearable levels. Ruth glaced away, unable to keep the eyecontact for a moment longer. Both stepped back as they heard laughing from the main Grid, sounds of Fiona berating Adam for forgetting the car keys filled the air and the moment was broken. Ruth was left wondering what might have happened if they hadn't been interupted. She had a feeling she would never know.


A/N Please review. Am thinking of leaving this as a one shot.