home
So far from home, so far to go,
and we've only just begun.

Lay your heart out, we're not coming back.


Mostly, he had been tired upon waking up.

Sakuya had been there, outside of the operating room, pacing about nervously, worried about all the things that could go wrong despite the reassurances of the operating team that everything would go perfectly smoothly, thank you very much for your concern sir we have this covered. There wasn't anyone else waiting with him - the others were too busy or had, somehow, managed to fall off the face of all Japan. If anything, waiting alone made him feel even more nervous than if he had someone around to take his frustration out on.

As soon as Ryouta was wheeled out of the room, hooked up to all sorts of odd this-es and thats and very much not resembling himself at all (no smiles, no laughing, no playful quips), Sakuya was right alongside him, shooting rapid-fire questions at the doctors about how the procedure had gone and if everything looked okay and how long it would take for Ryouta to actually wake up and should he look so deathly -

Sakuya had ended up sitting in a room in the recovery unit, practically glued to Ryouta's bed, accompanied only by the steady beeping of the machine monitoring vitals, waiting for a good fifteen minutes (it felt like three and a half lifetimes) before the other boy began to finally stir.

"Kawara!" He was considerate enough to not yell loudly, not considering enough to think jumping up and clinging to the bed railing and rattling it was a bad idea.

"S ... Sakuya?" Confused and groggy, Ryouta looked around the room, seeming to at first think he must have waken up from a nap. "Good ... morning?"

He tried to sit up, honestly put a good effort into it, and Sakuya moved to help him before he hurt himself or ripped out one of the lines connecting him to an IV drip or one of the other odd devices. The aristocrat ended up half sitting on the bed, Ryouta leaning heavily against him, an entirely awkward position.

"'M not at home, am I ...?" Ryouta's eyelids were already starting to flutter again, as if the whole moving business had sapped what little energy he had.

"Stay awake!" Sakuya commanded, jolting the other boy awake. He didn't want Ryouta to fall asleep again, some lingering fear in the back of his mind that he wouldn't wake up next time. "You're in the hospital, Kawara."

"The hospital ..." Ryouta remained silent for a long moment, and Sakuya was afraid that he had drifted back to sleep until he spoke. "... so it wasn't a dream."

It took only a moment for Sakuya to understand what he was talking about.

"Of course not, you fool." There was a severe lack of venom in Sakuya's voice compared to normal. He moved to return Ryouta back to a resting position, just as one of the nurses fluttered in.

"Oh, you're awake!" she chirped, and before he realized what was going on a flurry of doctors was filing into the room and Sakuya was being shoved out and he was angry now because he'd specifically requested to be with Ryouta the entire time and -

He pressed his hands against his eyes until he saw stars, sinking down against the wall and suddenly feeling entirely homesick.


a/n: I had a long inner debate with myself as to whether use their human forms or keep them as birds because human form wouldn't make sense but then how write movements and actions of bird body parts and - ugh, difficult. humans it is.

I started writing on shuffle but wow crap songs so I went to albums and this album was the first to play.
also, I adore the beachside(?) performance of this song more than the album version, but both are fantastic: [youtube goes here]/watch?v=csaHks2gydQ

Next chapter/track is 'a sail' and should be out eventually.