Important Note: Basically around July 2011 or so, I made myself a personal goal. The goal was that I'll make up and write 50 Alex Rider Fan Fictions. I have seven other Alex Rider Fan Fictions, and six of them are a part of this personal goal (A Different Day In The SAS, The Occupation Jeopardy, 5.A.M and Caught In A Chase 25 To Life, Social Interactions and From His Man-Made-Faked Blue Eyes). This is actually my SEVENTH fanfiction in this personal 50-Alex-Rider-Fanfics (which means there are now eight alex rider fics all together) I hope you enjoy it! I guess you could let me know in a review, how else would I receive feedback? :D
From Vague, Tinted Conversations
He doesn't fidget; I wonder if he's ever gone to therapy before, by how calm his position seems. It's only been two minutes, but I know he's reluctant. He doesn't seem like the person to just blurt things out- calculated: that's why he's calm. I mean; that's why he looks calm.
Although he doesn't seem like the type to be shy, either- or maybe, he never used to be shy... however, now I'm just going off his appearance. And that's just stereotypical of me, despite how most times I do seem to be right. So, maybe, I think; does he know what to say? By his behaviour, I can tell that he's paranoid. I know that for sure, so perhaps what he's really thinking, is how much of a double-agent-bitch I could be in some form of a twisted imagination. It makes my job harder, especially since I am genuinely curious about him.
I guess- I know- it doesn't help that I've had an absolute insane week. Honestly, I've filed for my own therapy session in two weeks. So for some reason, I've gotten this new, foreign perspectiveof myself... I find that I actually want to care... In fact, I do care about this 15-year-old stranger in front of me. I obviously do care about people; which is why I chose this job, but after so many disturbing, different stories, I started to fall into a trap of my own where I was almost numb to accepting them. Now, I realise, you can connect with everybody much easier when you re more open and... 'eccentric'... Or, well, the positive kind of eccentric.
Maternal Instinct, perhaps- something I'm sure he wouldn't believe was even common within any member related to M.I.6...
He clears his throat, trying to look content as his smooth brown eyes slowly gaze around the room behind me. "How old are you?" He looks me dead in the eye and I almost believe he is comfortable with me, as he adds, "not to sound rude, sorry. Age groups tend to act differently around other age groups... And you look brighter than the usual M.I.6 employees..."
So. He does know I know him... Know he has something related to M.I.6... I mean, obviously- since he's come to me. Softly, I smile, "Ah, Mr. Alex Rider... Why don't you guess, then?"
That's when the blond quickly glanced across a particular area in the room. For an actual, odd second, I thought he saw something (perhaps, paranoia's effects?) and I was tempted to turn around. But that's when I realised that he was analysing me through the arrangement of the room. It was a surprise- it was subtle- if I wasn't trained by M.I.6, I probably thought I was going crazy.
"26... no, 25."
I blinked slowly, looking down at my pad in surprise. I missed the cheeky grin that appeared on the boy's face, for that one second.
My writing pads are quickly running out. On my plastic, light green clipboard is about 5 pads left... It's such bad timing. I know I'd need to invest more for Alex Rider. Just a month prior I had been briefed on this meeting- apparently, it was... What was the word they used? 'Critical.' I noted that he had some involvement with M.I.6, because they seemed to be controlling 'what was right' for the teenager. I considered that maybe they wanted to use him... I knew about M.I.6's belief of 'doing it for the greater good'.
But they wouldn't tell me anything about the boy, anything of much use... So I worried; but then again, wouldn't that be illegal? So then I worried about maybe M.I.6 was testing little ol' me; testing my work and how I help people. It could be possible. I was never really watched by them... Or, from what I know of. For all I know, they could have put bugs in my room. I wouldn't put it passed them, despite these sessions needing to be confidential. So, instead, I believe the room isn't bugged, regardless.
What I was told about Alex, was his age- what grade he was in (I mean, really? Don't they think I could figure that out if I had his age? Especially since they told me his grades had been perfect...) There was a mention of his uncle (Ian?) and how he had passed away, and that Alex got depression.
When I finished high school, I actually went to college to do counselling for 3 years. I was a student counsellor until I was 21 years old, for a high school. I was filing in to be a local therapist after an event that occurred with my friend. I had eventually convinced my friend to go to a local therapist, and after a few sessions, I realised the therapist was an idiot and was not helping... and was a little stuck up.
At that point, I was a little more ill-tempered and I went to have a 'talk' with the therapist. Apparently, I had shocked the man... And he was fired, or something. Only, it was only a bit later after that day, when I was told that man was an M.I.6 operative and that therapist job was just a cover-up for some mission... So he wasn't actually 'fired', which made me feel a little better after feeling slightly guilty.
I got a promotion of some sorts- I got his job. I helped my friend. It didn't take long before I was approached- the male must've spoken about me at M.I.6 or something, I've no idea. It was during that time when I realised I did have patience for espionage... Patience I never knew I actually had in me to that extent. So, since that age (21), I stayed in this job- in my own office, being a therapist mainly for M.I.6 operatives.
Looking up at the blond boy, I cannot imagine him attempting suicide. But, that is why he is here. And I'm more than willing to help. And I know it's going to be a long journey with him- one I'm looking forward to- which is why it is a pity I've just about run out of writing pads to write on.
Despite him knowing he is right, through my first reaction, I say, "Yes, well... I'm 24. You've guessed pretty close! I've got three years worth of M.I.6 secrets and yet I'm not sure how the hell you figured that out." I do.
He replies with, "Everything." And I know the single word is his whole truth on that.
Alex isn't going to open up to me- I know. So, I ponder on how I could get him to trust me. This is the first time I'm talking to anybody below 20 years old... in this room, of course. Of course, that is because nobody under that age should know about M.I.6's existence. So how did he find out? His uncle?
"My grandma," I started, not really sure where I was going with my statement (why do I feel like such a mess this morning? Of all mornings?!)... Nonetheless, I noticed I grabbed Alex's attention. I knew I needed to steer clear of the clichés of 'friends', I had some instinct not to talk about my uncle or aunty... "She used to love researching people. She used to love hearing about people's dreams and trying to figure them out. In high school, the first elective she chose was history. However, she gave up trying to comprehend people after two years at uni... Now she's very egotistical... She still cares, though."
I stopped talking to buy myself time. I took in how Alex was handling this. I wandered about his grandma- did he know her? So far, it doesn't seem like a 'touchy' subject. Besides the neutral expression on his face, he kept eye contact. He looked interested, despite the slight surprise of the change of subject. I stuck my pen on my clip board and continued talking.
"I told her a dream I had, about two months ago. I vaguely remember being trapped under my blankets. Something was happening to her behind the door. After a struggle, I got out of the bed, and I remember just shaking... When I was opened the door, there was nobody physically there, but I felt something... Almost near me. And I could hear her crying and I started crying because I didn't know where to go."
Alex's expression of surprise and intrigue wiped off his face. I couldn't quite tell what was going on in his mind, but I got worried. Perhaps I sparked a memory, he moved his legs and his eyes twitched away from mine just for a second. Whatever I've done, I had an instinct not to stop- he couldn't look away from me; he wanted to know the end of the dream, despite it being that- adream- a stupid lack of reality to memories... Or perhaps he still thinks I'm a crazy bitch back-stabber and keeps his eyes trained on me just in case...
I know I have to speak a bit slowly when re-living my dream or explaining it or whatever; because Alex could react harshly. Just in case.
"I ran into my kitchen to find a knife. A big one; which I couldn't find. I was frustrated because I knew there was one in the drawer... But I guess my persona decided to ignore that fact," I rolled my eyes. "I was scared when the noises stopped. Without hesitation when a shadow jumped out at me I grabbed some random knife- that magically appeared on top of the bench- and ran out of the house. When I reached the grass on my lawn, I dropped to my knees and dropped the... dropped the knife. There was a baby fish on the grass, or on my hands... Whatever. I just knew I had to clean it- ASAP.
"So, I felt like somebody was behind me. I looked- but you know what was there? Fire. Everywhere. The whole neighbourhood was on fire... That's basically all I can remember. It's stupid and it has some many... random events, but either way, when I woke up; I wouldn't let myself fall asleep again that night. And of everything, the first thing I thought of, was my grandma. Which was silly as I knew it was just a dream."
Being a trained therapist for M.I.6 I learnt from the spies... A little, at least. I've realised having a strict an stubborn therapist doesn't work- not even for people outside of this world of M.I.6. When I was a counsellor at the high school, I realised this as well. I need to be myself- somebody they can look at for- not just a therapist, but kind of a friend. Somebody dependable. Somehow, now, I've managed to let the recounting of a simple dream, get to me. And Alex hasn't even seemed to have noticed, though, secretly I think he has.
His eyes barely blink and his chest rises and falls more hastily than I noticed earlier.
A/N: Wow, that took a lot to write... I have the next chapter ready. I could upload it... But I'd appreciate it if I got feedback from this chapter! I know it was mainly just off this random lady, but the next chapter will have more conversation between Alex and her. You get to see more into Alex. And it's also the last chapter. If I get even just one or two reviews to let me know what they think... I'll upload the next chapter quicker!