Okay. I am so sorry that this has taken so long to get out. I'll save you from me blathering on about why the chapter is so late so that you can just read the chapter. Enjoy.
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The next morning I really wanted to say that everything was back to normal, but in reality I knew that was definitely not true. L hadn't even looked at me, let alone talked to me all morning. I had almost expected… no wanted him to say something about the day before. We had moved down to the computers like always, but the space between us wasn't normal. It wasn't that same awkwardness that was usually there, but was instead filled with a kind of stagnant air. It was unsettling. I snuck glances at L when he wasn't paying attention – not that he ever really was. I noticed that his hands had stopped moving along the keyboard of the computer and I felt the sudden urge to wipe away the indent on his brow that had recently formed. It was obvious that he was thinking very hard about something, but I wasn't sure what. Although as a light, almost unnoticeable blush covered his cheeks I figured that I could chance a guess. I opened my mouth, getting ready to finally talk to him, but when his features suddenly twisted down into a frown I immediately shut my mouth. I watched as his face showed so many emotions that I had never seen before. I was surprised watching as almost every emotion possible passed over the face of a person who rarely ever showed what he was feeling. I tentatively reached towards him, stopping just before my fingers touched him. Making my decision I laid my hand on his shoulder. He jumped and turned to face me. I almost gasped at the expression on his face. He just looked so… lonely. Had what I done last night really affected him that much? I put my other hand on his opposite shoulder.
"Are… Are you alright, Ryuzaki?" I asked him slowly, almost not wanting to hear the answer. I didn't want to hear that I had upset him. His eyes became wary, as if he didn't want to answer. Seeing this changed my mind about wanting him not to answer. He looked slightly to the side.
"I'm fine," he replied, his voice unwavering. I didn't believe him for one second, but I also didn't want to say anything. I knew that I would probably say the wrong thing and I didn't need him even more upset with me. I looked at him sternly in the eyes.
"Are you sure?" I said, my voice laced with concern. A few seconds passed, both of us sitting as still as statues, until L nodded slowly. I watched L carefully as he turned back to his screen, his hands once more moving swiftly across the keyboard. I turned back to my own screen, keeping up the pretense of working even though I was really watching him from the corner of my eye.
"So, have you found anything yet?" I asked, trying to clear the awkwardness and tension that was still lingering in the air.
"No," it seemed that all that my attempt at conversation had only served to worsen the awkwardness. I leaned back in my chair, finally giving up on pretending to work. L barely spared me a glance as I sighed and slid down in the chair, something that I rarely did. I knew that I needed to stop and think about everything that had happened, I didn't like the way things were and it was putting me into a rather sour mood. Despite the fact that I wanted to think I didn't want to do so in front of L. Even if he wasn't paying attention to me I didn't want him to catch me thinking as he was sometimes able to see right through me. It would have to be later tonight when L fell asleep, something that had seemed to become a regular occurrence. I turned my attention back to L. I wanted to talk to him, but I felt that if I tried again I would just make things worse.
Today had been horrible. Other than my failed attempt at conversation that morning L and I hadn't said a single word to each other. I was now lying in the spacious bed, L as far away from me as he could get without falling out of the bed. I looked towards him and saw that his breathing had yet to even out, meaning that he wasn't asleep. I hoped that he would sleep; I had figured that he would since he had been sleeping every night of the week, but L was rather unpredictable.
About an hour passed and L was still not asleep. He was definitely close though since he was fairly still and his breathing had calmed slightly. Even I was getting tired and I was unsure whether I would be able to stay up long enough to be able to think about what I had done and what I should do. After what had seemed like hours of waiting, L's breath evened out and slowed, signaling that he was finally asleep. I stared up at the ceiling with my arms behind my head. I needed to understand what I felt for L. I thought about how much I liked it when he laughed or smiled. I thought about how my eyes seemed to always be focused on him. I realised that my thoughts would always drift off to him. I thought about how soft his hair looked and how badly I wanted to run my fingers through it. I thought about how we were both on the same level of intelligence. I tried to think of something that I disliked about L, but couldn't come up with anything other than the fact that he was L, the world's greatest detective. I am Kira, I told myself, not wanting to believe that this was really happened. Even as I tried to convince myself that because I was Kira I couldn't possibly feel this way, but even as I thought this I found myself not caring in the slightest. It hit me then with full force. I was almost completely in love with L.