So I'm planning a new story, but I'm still not sure about it so I thought I'd post part of a chapter to see what you guys think about it, btw I'm am still writing CoD Bloopers and chapter three is the last one, so it's taking a little longer to write than the others but in the meantime I hope you like this part of my new story 'Breaking Point'. Hope you like it!


You are now Natara Williams

You follow Mal, into your apartment. Still desperate to get him to see reason, but he refuses to listen.

Natara:"Mal, wait just think about this for a second..."

Mal:" No Natara! I meant what I said; I can't do this anymore, Blaise almost died because of me!"

Mal turns and looks at you. It breaks your heart to see the pain in his eyes. You step forward and gently take his hand.

Natara:" Mal, it wasn't your fault, stop blaming yourself."

Mal pulls away and runs his hands through his hair in frustration. You watch as he paces around the room, then he takes a deep breath and looks back at you.

Mal:" Natara, I have tried to be a good cop and damn it I am a good cop, and every day we save the lives of people we don't know and never see again but when it comes to saving the people we care about…we can't even do that right! I mean look at what happened when you almost lost Neha."

You instantly freeze, lost for words. Mal take a shaken breath, and then takes a step towards you.

Mal:" We are always losing people we care about and there is nothing we can do about it; Tasha, Shawn, Ken, my Dad! All those people are gone and it's our fault!"

Mal collapses on the couch and sits with his head in his hands; you take a second before sitting beside him, playing a hand on his back.

Natara:" Mal, I know it's hard but we have to keep going. You are amazing at what you do and your right you do save lives, you should be proud of that!"

Mal lifts his head and looks at you, forcing a weak smile but it quickly disappears.

Mal:" Nat, this isn't how I wanted to say it for the first time but…I love you and I couldn't imagine losing you, especially if it were my fault. But how many times are we going to lose each-other before the next times, the last time?"

You let out a deep breath, and flop back against the couch. Mal sides back next to you and you rest your head on his shoulder.

Natara:" You're right. But we can't just give up; we've done too much good to walk away now."

Mal pulls away and rises to his feet.

Mal:" Natara, I'm serious. I can't do it anymore."

Natara:" Mal please don't do this, not now."

Mal looks down at you, deep into your eyes. You fight tears as they well up in your eyes. You try to repeat yourself but it's heard as a broken whisper.

Natara:" Please."

Mal's face drops, he looks defeated and hopeless.

Mal:" I'm sorry Natara, but the SFPD, this partnership; everything… I'm done."

Without another word, Mal walks to the front door and leaves.


So what did you guys think? I hope you liked it, please review. If you like it I'll post the first chapter of the story soon, probably after I've finished CoD Bloopers! Jade xx