You know, you used to be my hero? I used to look up to your ass; I used to believe in you. Then you left us, again. You left mum again. You left me again. But you didn't leave half-assed, no, you left us a baby to manage on top of all that.
Do you know how hard it was to watch Goten grow up? Mum going more and more insane by the moment, a little boy having to witness all that...
I used to defend you, dad. I used to love you, dad; I think you used to love me too. Every time mum started off about how much of a sleazebag you were, I'd defend you. You were my fucking idol…
Every night, I saw mum with a bottle, drinking away the sorrow. Every night, I saw her losing the will to live… every night, I saw her grow weaker and weaker. Then Goten came along. He looked so much like you – I hated it. Mum said he was just like how you used to be… does that mean that he'll grow up to become an uncaring, lying asshole?
You made me fight Cell, I wasn't even a teenager. The world's life on the line… how could you? Why didn't you make yourself stronger? You were meant to be the guy that was always there for me… but I guess not. The truth came out pretty quick. Bastard.
Do you know how deep those scars ran? You let me kill you and then rubbed it into my face. You could've come back… I made my mistakes but I was eleven, that didn't mean you needed to leave us and run off.
For seven years… seven fucking years. I grew up every day, blaming myself for everything. Maybe I'd kill Goten too?
We ran out of money pretty quick, you weren't there to do anything about it. Did you ever have to take care of your baby brother and insane mum at the same time? No. Instead you killed your grandfather.
… Gohan. You killed Gohan, and I killed you. Isn't that ironic? Maybe it would've been funnier if I actually did… but no, I didn't kill you.
You let yourself die. I could've stopped it, but I was eleven. I didn't know what was going on! But you, you chose not to come back. I did stupid things, but it was true that you didn't care for us.
Do you know how many birthdays I cried on? On every damn one of them I wished that you were here. You didn't come back, hell you were probably looking down upon us laughing. Christmas was even worse; mum went ballistic for the entire week every time it rolled around – for half of his childhood, Goten never even knew the joy of waking up to open gifts under a tree that he'd helped to decorate.
You never had a dad, but you never tried to be one either. Fuck, you never were one. You ran off the first chance you got, and I bet you were dancing when Cell sent you over to Otherworld: no son you never wanted, and no wife you didn't give two shits about.
You just caused more pain, more and more pain. And you knew you would… do you know how hard it was… facing mum that night? At least Piccolo was there for me. He was the one carrying me home, over his shoulder. Not you. You decided you liked screwing around with King Kai more than your own family.
For that matter, Piccolo was always more of a father than you ever were. He was there, as soon as you took off… every time you took off, he was around. He even died for me. Not the planet, not for himself, but just for me. Because he actually cared for me…
I might have been able to forgive you after you came back. It took a fighting tournament to drag your pathetic excuse of an oblivious grin here, and even that was probably only because it was exacerbated by the prospect of fighting with Vegeta. Of course, you'd spend the only twenty-four hours of possible atonment you had fighting. That was just like you.
The chance to fight in the ring… it interested you more than getting to know your now eighteen-year-old son, or the seven-year-old son you'd never seen before. Or even spending any of that time with mum. No, that was beyond you.
Do you understand how much you've hurt us?
If you'd gotten that proper match with Vegeta, you probably would've returned to the afterlife, content. But no, you didn't, so you stuck around.
You ended up coming back eventually… and things were almost good. Except it was too late then. By that point, I wasn't a kid anymore. I was a grown man, eighteen, and I'd met the love of my life.
I grew up and moved out pretty quick, and you still really didn't even try to get to know me. All you did was fight, day in and day out. If you couldn't fight, you'd train. I'm surprised mum even put up with your bullshit then… she welcomed you back in, right away.
But you betrayed that again. Screwing up our family by only that much was too little for you. No… ten years later, you left again. What for this time? Nothing could top being dead, right?
No, you did it again. You went out to go and train fucking Buu reincarnated. That would've been okay if you hadn't vanished off the face off the Earth. You never even visit…
I'd visit you, but I'm not sure that I could handle seeing your face again. You know, Pan's grown up without knowing you too? That makes me, Goten and her.
If you ever come near me, or my family… maybe this time I will actually kill you.
… Because you're dead as a dad to me.