A/N: I wanted to write this yesterday, but then I was too lazy, and fell asleep before I can even touch the computer. This morning I recalled it so here you are.

*UPDATED*

Disclaimers: Despite I desperately want to, I don't own pokèmon.


Some people said that once you join the dark side, you are unable to have good feelings again.

You are not supposed to love or be loved. That you forget everything concerning affection and care.

Well, I don't think things stay this way. The dark veil of mist that is over your eyes, is destined to fade away at the first sparkle of light that life gives you.

If something or someone really matters to you, you can't forget forever.

I spent most of my young life being a villain, serving the Mask of Ice with devotion.

I still don't know what kept me, even when I had the chance to leave (And I got plenty of them) I had always declined.

I was aware I had a family somewhere that was desperately looking for me, that there was a mother with a destroyed heart, crying out for her missing child, but it was like I didn't give a damn.

I think what made me start to think differently, was an episode. One single episode in my life that, for the first time, enlightened the right path for me.

I was pacing around Jotho, it was a sunny day, I can't remember what was I planning to do, it's not important, though.

What took my attention was someone shouting. It wasn't a scream of agony or pain, it remembered me more of a fighting yell.

I peeked back from the trees to see a boy. I was sure I had never met him before. His hair and mine were the same color, his were just a little longer and curly on the points.

He was training a Ralts. The little creature was trying to learn the move psybeam, I could tell.

I had better stuff to do, rather than playing spy on a boy I didn't know, yet I stood there watching as he tried his hardest to teach a move to his pokèmon.

He had something so familiar, apart the hair, I mean, there was a book discarded at his feet, and the way he moved recalled me of someone. But I was sure it was the first time I saw his face.

Ralts put its paws over its head, concentrating, a small ball of violet light forming in front of it.

"You're doing fine, now focus on the can and hit it!"

Even the voice sounded familiar.

Ralts released the energy, completely missing its aim. The pokèmon turned to his trainer, as it was sorry.

The mysterious boy patted its head "Don't worry about that, you worked hard, now it's just about perfecting it. I think it's time we head back home, lunch is almost ready, and I think you're hungry as well"

My eyes were still plastered on him, I squashed my brain trying to give my impressions some sense. Maybe I noticed him sometimes before while pacing around?

My thoughts were interrupted when a strange laughter (and yes this time I am sure I've never heard it) reached my ears.

"Look, look, look. The worm of the books decided to free himself from the library…"

A boy came out of the bush, judging from his accent, he wasn't from Jotho at all. He was even silly to look at, with his watery blue hair that held two curls near his ears. There was a Wartotle walking beside him.

"What do you want, Wallace?"

Wallace, this was his name, got closer to the trainer "Nothing, I see you were working hard to teach your pokèmon a useless move like that. So I thought we can have a fight, so I can show you how to train pokèmon in the right way"

"I don't need your help, thank you"

"Are you saying like this because you're pissing in your pants? I should have known what a sissy you are!"

Seriously, he was the one to talk.

"I'm not a sissy!"

"Prove it and fight."

"But I have only Ralts with me, it's not fair, it's tired"

Another laugh from Wallace, and at this point, I really felt like go and punching him square on the face.

"You're whining like a little child, come on and fight!"

With that, Wallace stole the book that was on the grass "Hey! Give it back, you rude!"

Keeping the lavender boy away with one hand and holding the book with the other, Wallace read the title on the cover "Towards zero? This sounds interesting." The tone he said it, told that he didn't give a fuck about.

"Leave it down. A special person chose that for me!"

Why my inner radar was giving signals? That title…some memories covered in the mist appeared in my mind, a book-store and a kid gathering a book

"Mom, he has several from this author, I think he'll like it!"

my head pounded as the memory rose.

"Who was it, a girl, perhaps? I doubt it, as neither a rock would come with you!"

Well, you make piss the shit, how's it?

"No. it's not from a girl, but it doesn't make it less important. Is the only thing he left me!" Wallace moved his hands over a pond, smirking evilly "No! Ok, I'll fight! I'll fight! Just don't ruin it!"

There was a grin of sadistic satisfaction printed on Wallace's face. I clenched my fists, it was better for him to run away before my repressed anger would have risen back. I was just fifteen back then, but I fought with adult people and a spoiled seventeen year old boy surely didn't impress me!

Ralts was sent out, signs of tiredness pretty evident on it.

Wallace proudly sent his Wartotle, seriously it was even one level evolution higher. It was like stealing candies from a baby. And he called the other "sissy". Why didn't he use a Magikarp then?

"Ralts, don't work yourself too much. Try to do the possible, but don't go forward"

"What a prick you are! Wartotle, let's show them how a real man fights!"

Yes, he was truly the shining example!

"Use water gun!"

"Ralts, use light screen!"

The little psychic pokèmon created a barrier, which, unluckily, wasn't enough to stop the foe's attack. The water jet made Ralts fall down, and it took him quite a long time to get back on its ground "Was it necessary to use such an aggressive attack? You see in what conditions my pokèmon is!"

"That's because you suck as a trainer. An able one, wouldn't let his pokèmon go that weak!"

A soon as the poor Ralts was back up on its paws, Wartotle threw itself at it using headbutt, this time the opponent couldn't stand, and ended K.O.

"I knew it! Burying yourself in the library, studying all those books on pokemon's special abilities wasn't enough!" he threw the book back at the boy, who was on his knees, shaking for the nerves.

"Here, I don't need this kind of crap. Come and fight me again when you're grown a little"

How dared he? That was too much to bear even for a villain like me!

I acted on impulse, coming out from the leaves, I think that the black hoodie gave me a particularly threatening look

"Hey, you there. Why don't you fight with someone whose pokèmon are healthy?"

He looked up at me laughing "And who are you now? Some kind of superhero? With the mask and everything. You are pitiful"

"You wished I was a superhero. If so, I wouldn't have given a shit to a jackass like you."

"Hey, mind your words, you germ!"

He menaced me, by grabbing my collar

"Hey, you go away. He's not joking"

The voice came from behind me, the poor boy was worried for me, not knowing that the one who should have pissed in his pants was Wallace "Don't worry, I'm not either."

"What the hell do you want?"

"Isn't it obvious? I want a fair fight. Just to establish who's the sissy around here."

"You don't have to do that! I can have my rematch whenever I want…"

That pleading voice…

"Will! Can you sleep with me? Please I'm scared of the darkness!"

"So, are you accepting my challenge?"

Wallace greeted his teeth, it was like he was aware that I wouldn't go easy on him, but was too proud to refuse "Fine. I'll beat you up so hard you will forget your name!"

Impossible, he said it.

He sent a Starmie out. Wrong choice, very wrong choice. You can't use a psychic pokèmon against one that has dealt with them all his life long!

As he was playing with fully evolved pokèmon, I decided to repay him, by sending my Xatu out. I knew it was a little hazardous, as Starmie could have known even ice moves, but I decided to risk. You're not a real trainer if all you can aim at is the weakness/resistance game.

He didn't seem to share my opinion though, without thinking over it for a minute, he ordered Starmie to use an ice beam. But I was light years forward him, and Xatu easily avoided it. He should have thought about it before, as a flying pokèmon Xatu was far more faster than Starmie.

"Xatu, use fly!" my pokèmon flew up so high, it could barely be seen again, Starmie attempted a blizzard, useless to say, that the attack was easily avoided. When my pokèmon came down in a high speed, Starmie didn't even have the time to move as it was hit with a powerful peck. It wasn't fainted though.

"You little bastard…."

How's it when you have to face someone smarter than you, bro?

Understanding he was running out of attacks, he desperately attempted for a second ice beam. This time, I left Xatu wait, and when the ray was about to hit, I ordered him to use swift. My attack was so powerful that it pushed even the ice beam back to the owner, making Starmie flying back, hitting its master on the face.

Wallace fainted.

Revenge, sweet revenge.

I turned to look straight at the one that caught my interest, he was staring at me, as if he suspected something.

It was when our eyes crossed, that I was finally able to recognize him.

My big brother, the one who read scary novels and then asked for me to sleep together. The one that taught me everything about those wonderful creatures that are the psychic pokèmon.

"Thank you" he said, nodding in sign of appreciation.

"No problem. That guy really pissed me off." I made as to go, if he recognized me, I was done.

A light tug on my sleeve stopped me.

"Wait, are you sure we've never met?" maybe he was squinting something. I could not lie, or better, I didn't want to. But surely I couldn't tell him all the truth.

So I grabbed his other hand who was holding the book; that boom that I chose for him, and held it up with him "Maybe."

He lowered his eyes to the book "You know, how you behave, your fighting technique, and even your eyes, remember me about my little brother"

I played dumb. Luckily my hair were covered by the hood.

"Do you miss him?"

He just nodded, god, I could tell he was hurt.

"Don't worry then. I'm sure that, sooner or later, you two are going to meet and spend time together again"

I know I should have told him, but I couldn't put his life on danger.

There, point blankly, he hugged me.

"I'll wait, just promise me it won't be too long"

I often went back to that place, never showing myself, I just left a book with a message for him now and then. So I was sure he wouldn't feel too lonely.

Back to now, I could joke on him, I could argue with him and complain over his literary addiction; as he could mock me for drinking like a camel, smoking and swearing. That's just part of the life, I know that whenever I find myself in a bad situation, I can always count on him to come and give me precious advices, as well as I'm never sick of answering the phone whenever his insomnia takes over.

And anyone who tries to wound him must think about it two times. There's some kind of an angry beast that's ready to kick them in the nuts for good.

My brother is too precious for me.