Okay so as I said last chapter, this is going to be the last chapter of this "amazing", I hope, story. I know I'm still not good writing lemos but I do my best, I really do. Enjoy!
A week ago I went to Edward's house for the first time. The evening started off great, we were talking about our families and about our past, but then I made the huge mistake of kissing him. At first Edward kissed me back and even pulled me closer to his body, but then he pulled away and revealed something he had kept to himself for the time I have known him. He has a boyfriend.
Edward has a boyfriend.
I can't be with him, never, he is taken by some stranger and he didn't even had the balls to tell me that when we first met. It hurts. It hurts so much to know that the person you love, is in love with someone else. Yes, I am in love with Edward Cullen. There was something about him that from the first time I saw him, I wanted more. To know more about him. To feel more of him, to talk more. We started off a routine after we met but last week was the first time he actually invited me over to his place, instead of going to a coffee shop. The weeks prior to the incident had been the best weeks of my entire life. Every time I saw Edward waiting for me at the coffee shop, or him walking up to my table, my heart skipped a beat. He was perfect. Everything about him. His eyes, his lips, his hair, his nose, even his cheeks. His skin looked so smooth that every time he blushed I stopped the urge to lean into him and caress his cheeks.
After the incident I went to Noir and told Oliver and James about what happened. Everything. But they were on Edward's side.
"Jasper, I'm sure he had a reason for not telling you. Maybe he was scared that if he told you, you would immediately reject him and stay away from him, and that means that he feels something for you too." Oliver had said that.
"Yes Jasper. Pleas don't be like this, don't shut yourself in again. Please, I'm begging you." Said James as he placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Give him another chance."
"I can't even see his face James." I told him as a silent tear rolled down my cheek, which Oliver wiped away with his index finger. "It really hurts. Imagine loosing Oliver, James." I then turned to Oliver. "Or you loosing James. How would you guys feel?"
"We know that you are hurting Jazz, but can you at least give him a chance to explain?" Oliver said almost begging.
I considered it. Maybe if I just talk to Edward and ask him why he did that, things can go back to how they were. No, they things will never go back to how they were. I would still be in love with him, and he would still be taken by someone else, and I'd still be hurting. But I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and talk to him the next time I see him. Explain is the least thing he could do after what he did to me.
"Okay." I said as I wiped my cheeks with my sleeves. "I'll try talking to him the next time I see him." James and Oliver smiled at me and nodded. Suddenly a cold gust of wind hit my face as the door to the local opened, and there he was. Edward. He looked like a mess but at the same time, he looked so beautiful. My heart began to race and I felt that pain again. Edward opened his mouth to say something but closed it quickly again. And then he was gone.
"Jasper." I heard my name being called. Maybe it was Oliver, maybe it was James, or maybe it was my imagination, but I didn't care. All I cared about then was the fact that Edward came here, and he saw me, and he left, just as quick as he came, he was gone.
Warm arms surrounded my body as I felt James pulling me closer to his body for an embrace, I then realized I was crying. Tears were flowing freely down my cheeks and my chest hurt so much I even thought I was going to have a heart attack. I can't stand being here, at the same place I met Edward, where I first saw him and secretly fell in love with him without me knowing. So I left. I ran away from the store leaving my car behind at the employees parking lot, leaving my car keys at the reception desk, leaving my friends who were trying to comfort me, and leaving my heart were I met him. Edward Cullen.
After that day I never came back. Now it's been a week and all I have done is work. I've worked my ass off just to forget about Edward. My students grades are rapidly decreasing by the level of my quizzes. My mood also affected my students and I blame no one but me for that. I have to get a grip on myself and continue with my daily life. I can no longer cause my students trouble just because of my personal problems.
I had brunch with my parents again, but I never told them about Edward. They asked me if something was wrong, they obviously noticed my change in mood, but I said nothing and just smiled at them dismissing the subject and distracting them with asking about their job. That always works on my parents.
Today is finally Friday and I plan to spend the evening grading extra credit papers of my students. I realized I was being too harsh on them for the last week so I decided to assign an extra credit assignment that was due today. Since I have nothing better to do that to mope around at my apartment and sulk about my situation I decided that I might as well grade the papers. Distract my mind from Edward and try really hard not to think of him and not to lose my temper with little mistakes of the students.
I opened my bag where I kept the papers and set them on the table; next to them was a glass of wine and a grilled sandwich I made myself when I got home from work. At 4:50 exactly I began to grade papers. Taking my time, sipping my wine, and eating my sandwich. One paper in particular caught my attention; it was the best paper I've received since I started teaching. Normally I read them quickly, just checking for any mistake, but for this one I took my time. I re-read it several times actually. It talked about the civil war. The perspective on the student has on the topic is magnificent, it reminds me of when I was in college and I wrote a similar paper. His work leaves a want to read it again and again. It was, with no doubt, the best paper I've ever read, this deserves an A+.
I was so indulged on the assignment that I lost track of time and by the time I noticed it was already 10:45. I stood up from my office chair to stretch my legs, I then go ahead to pick up the dishes on the messy desk and rinse them on the sink. I was drying my hands when I heard the doorbell ring. Thinking it might be Oliver and James I opened the door right away with a sigh of frustration, but my breath caught on my throat at the sight before me. It was Edward. My heart began to race and my chest hurt once again. I wanted to ask him what he was doing here, but I didn't seem to find my voice.
"Hey." Edward said as he gave me a sad smile. I let out a shaky breath I didn't know I was holding, and opened my mouth to speak but I still couldn't. Edward was holding a paper on his right hand and what seemed to be my car keys on his other hand. He slowly and very shyly lifted the paper into my sight so I could read it. I took the paper from his hand, it read:
Edward Cullen, we inform you that your piece has been chosen as one of the first places and will be performed by our orchestra on February the 13th. We expect your presence that day at 7:30 so the performance can start at 8:30. Congratulations.
Seattle Symphony Orchestra.
I gasped as I finished reading the letter. I remember when Edward told me about this, he said that he submitted one of his pieces to a very important contest and that he was waiting for an answer from them. He was very nervous as he told me that he needed to wait at least another week. I encouraged him and assured him that he would win since every piece he made was absolutely beautiful.
I didn't know how to react. Of course I was happy for him, but I was still hurt by what he did to me, but not even that could make me hide the small smile that appeared on my face. "Congratulations Edward. " I told him as I returned the paper to him. "I told you that you'd win."
"Yeah, thank you Jasper." After Edwards's words, there was an awkward silence before we both began to speak at the same time. "I'm so-"
"Why did you-" I said at the same time as Edward spoke.
"Sorry. You go first." He said.
I took a deep breath and made sure my tears did not show on my eyes now that I felt them coming. "Why…" I gulped. "Why did you run away that day at Noir? I wanted to give you a chance to explain, you know? To give you another chance. But then you ran away and made me believe that you didn't even want to see me anymore. I just want to know why."
Edward looked down at his feet and I could see regret and sadness in those deep beautiful green eyes of his. He looked like he was debating with himself. He then finally sighed deeply. "I didn't know what to say." He answered as he looked up at me. "I was afraid that whatever came out of my mouth would upset you even more. I didn't want you to hate me even more that you already do and honestly I didn't know how to face you after what I did to you." His eyes watered and soon after tears were streaming down his cheeks. "Jasper, I am so sorry for what I did. I know that you hate me now but please. Just… please."
"Please what, Edward?"
"Please forgive me. I didn't want to hurt you." He begged with me, I saw in his eyes the complete regret he felt from the bottom of his heart but I just couldn't go through with this knowing that Edward still has a boyfriend waiting for him at home. And that made me angry once again.
"Why don't you go apologize to your fucking boyfriend?" I told him with disgust and began to close the door on his face, but Edward's words stopped me. I wasn't sure if I heard him right or if I was just hallucinating what I wanted to hear. "What?" I asked him shocked as I opened the door again.
"I broke up with him." He repeated his earlier words. I had heard him right, I was not hallucinating, he actually said he broke up with his boyfriend. "Jasper." He called my name and I turned to look at him. "Can I please come in and explain everything to you?"
I hesitated at his words but decided to let him in since I still want to hear him out. I stepped aside and Edward walked into my living room. I closed the door behind him and walked towards Edward, we both sat down. "Okay, go on." I said.
Before he spoke, Edward wiped his tears with the sleeve of his sweater. "When I first met you at Noir I felt something. I didn't know what it was, and it scared the shit out of me. At first. But then we started to hang out and I realized I was feeling something for you, and it wasn't only friendship, it was something I've never felt for anyone, not even my boyfriend. I knew I was attracted to you but I didn't know it was stronger than that." Edward looked down to his lap and fidgeted with his hands. "I was planning on breaking up with him the first week we met, but I just couldn't.
"I was afraid that if I broke up with him and you rejected me I would end up alone again. I don't want to be alone, I've been alone my whole life, and apart from my family I have nothing. I was too afraid, so I didn't break up with him." He looked up at me and stared into my eyes. I wanted to look away, but his eyes had me trapped. "When you kissed me that day at my apartment I knew what I felt for you and I knew I'd never feel that way for anyone besides from you. I knew I had fallen for you." I was speechless and frozen in place. I wanted to say something, but I couldn't. "I love you Jasper. I love you so much and it's killing me to know that you are hurting because of me, and for that I am so sorry. I know you hate me now, but I just wanted you to know."
Frozen in place. Mouth drying. Heart racing. Eyes watering. I began to shake slightly as I found the words to tell him, but they wouldn't come. I wanted to tell him that I didn't hate him, that I could never hate him and that I forgive him for making his mistake.
"Please say something." Edward begged with his eyes as he looked directly at me again, trapping me once again. Finally I took a deep breath and let my tears flow.
"I love you too Edward." I said as I crashed my lips to his and captured them in a passionate kiss. I closed my eyes when I saw Edward doing the same, I then felt his hands on the back of my neck. I pulled away from him just enough to speak. "I don't hate you. I could never hate you Edward." I kissed him again. "I love you." Another kiss. "I love you so much it hurts." I pushed him down on the couch so I was on top of him, supporting my weight on my arms to not crush him. Edward opened his mouth giving me entrance to my tongue and our tongues danced inside of his mouth in a passionate dance that followed down his jaw and towards his neck. I could hear Edward repeating over and over that he loved me and I smiled as I bit down on his neck making him moan.
I grabbed his waist and stood up from the couch. Edward jumped to me and I catch him by his ass as I walked away from the living room and into my bedroom. When I felt my knees hit the bed I gently placed Edward over it and taking off my shirt in the process. Edward crawled to the top of the bed and I followed him, hovering over him once again. I unbuttoned his white shirt and threw it so it could join mine on the floor. Edward pulled my closer to hum by the neck.
"Jasper." He moaned. "Jasper, make love to me." He whispered in my ear.
I pulled back so I could look at his face. His eyes were darkened with lust and I could feel his prominent erection under my own. He smiled up at me as a blushed covered his face. He's always looked adorable when he blushes. I smiled back at him and gave him my answer by kissing him again. He deepened the kiss as he turned us over so he could straddle my hips. He began trailing kisses from my chest to my abdomen and to my navel, where he stopped and nipped as he unbuttoned my jeans and pulled them down with my underwear. I kicked them off my legs to get them out of the way. Edward then proceeds to take off the rest of his clothes, but before he could move I changed our positions again so I was on the top. I did the same to him as he did to me and when we were both completely naked I took both of our cocks into my hand and began to stroke them. I looked at Edward and saw that his face was red once again ad he arched his back in pleasure.
With my free hand I massaged his balls, making Edward moan. I pulled away from him and stopped what I was doing so I could retrieve a condom and lube that were on my bedside table. I squirted lube on my left hand as I continued to stroke Edward. With my lubed up hand I circled his puckered hole taking him by surprise as he moaned loudly. I chuckled as I looked at him. When I was sure he was feeling enough pleasure by my ministrations on his cock, I inserted two fingers in him.
"Jasper." Edward called my name in pleasure. "More."
"I gave him what he wanted by licking his shaft, from base to tip, then I engulfed him completely until my nose hit his pubes, tickling my nose. As I scissored my fingers inserting another, I swallowed around his head. "Fuck." I head Edward moan, making me moan around him in response.
I felt my cock twitch, begging for attention, and when I knew Edward was ready I retrieved from him and took the condom, ripping the packet open and rolling it on. I lubed my cock and then took my place between his legs. I rested my weight in my forearms as I kissed him deeply. "You don't know how long I've longed for this Edward. I crave your body so badly." I whispered into his ear as I placed the tip of my cock in his entrance.
Edward moaned. "Then take me Jasper. I can't wait any longer either."
Mouthing and 'I love you' I slid into Edwards body, feeling his warmth surrounding me, and I had to stop when I was completely inside of his, or I'd shoot my load right there. Edward whimpered a little and squinted his eyes.
"Are you okay?" I asked as I stoked his cheek and kissed his lips.
"I'm okay." He whispered and moved his hips. "Move Jasper." I complied and began to move slowly. "Harder." He moaned and took his cock in his hands, pumping it. I increased my thrusts and took Edwards cock in my hand replacing his.
"Shit." I grunted out as I felt how tight Edward was. "You feel so good Edward." Increasing the speed of my hand to coordinate with my thrusts I leaned down to him and kissed his neck. Edward surrounded my neck with his hands and pulled me closer, wrapping his legs around my ass making me go deeper. With every thrust I hit Edward's prostate, making him moan loudly. I was sure that by now my neighbors already knew what was happening, since Edward couldn't stop moaning and screaming out my name.
"Edward, I love you." I moaned out as my thrusts become more erratic. "I love you so much."
"I love you too Jasper." He yelled. "I-I'm going to come."
"Then come baby. Come for me." I told him as I thrusted even harder into him. "Jasper!" Edward yelled my name as hot streams of come landed on his stomach. I came soon after him, and I collapsed into his body, completely spent. Edward surrounded my body with his arms and sighed in contentment.
"Jasper." Edward broke the silence after a few minutes.
"Will you stay with me forever?" I pulled away to look at him. He was smiling and his eyes were full of love and adoration, and I knew I wanted to stay with this man for the rest of my life, loving him and cherishing him.
"I promise." I answered to his previous question and I smiled back at him, hoping that he could see in my eyes what I see in his.
"Forever?" He asked.
"Forever." I reassured him and leaned down to kiss him, as if it was the first time.
So yeah, this is it. Please don't forget to R&R. And one more thing! I'll be starting a new serie in the next couple of weeks so please look forward to it. Thanks!