Author's Notes: Heelllooooo! This is my first attempt at writing RK fanfiction, and what do I do? I write something that has probably been done a million times over, but I couldn't get the idea out of my head. If these scenes somehow resemble something you/someone you know has written before, it is completely accidental and I apologize for the similarity. I include both original scenes *stifling laughter* and altered scenes from the anime. Enjoy! And review, of course :)
Dedications: Dedicated to my lovely friend Kitsune no Alz, who writes wonderful fanfic :) She sparked the idea with a parody somewhat similar to the first scene. Arigatou, Alz-chan!
Shishio: *feral grin at Kenshin, who he's dangling in the air due to the great difference in his and Shishio's height* Will you also become my prey? *bites a great chunk out of Kenshin's shoulder*
Kenshin: *screams like a girl because getting bitten out of is very painful, and because his seiyuu is...um...a woman*
Shishio: *chewing happily* Raw meat...yummy...
Kenshin: *stops screaming* You bastard! *grabs Shishio by the shoulders and takes a bite out of HIS shoulder*
Shishio: *screams like a man because...uh...his seiyuu's a man*
Kenshin: *gnawing thoughtfully* Tastes like beef-jerky.
Sano: *mutters* Cannibalistic freaks.
Shishio: *walks down catwalk, strutting his stuff* I'm too sexy for my bandages, too sexy for my bandages...*pelvic thrust*
Kenshin: What the fuck de gozaru yo?!
Kaoru: *absentmindedly* Kenshin, will you please go buy some tofu? *turns away to go back into the dojo*
Kenshin: *grabs her by the waist* Come back, bitch! *kisses her passionately, tongue and all*
Kaoru: *wide eyes* Ken...shin...
Kenshin: *wiggles his eyebrows, amber eyes glowing* Battousai wants to play!
A/N: Hahahahahaha! *cough* Sorry. I apologize if making Kenshin curse so much offends you, but I find it rather amusing. Go Kenshin! Let loose the potty mouth!
Kenshin: Kaoru-dono, this unworthy one just wants to protect you, de gozaru yo.
Kaoru: *sighs* I know, Kenshin, it's just that...*trails off*
Kenshin: What is it, de gozaru yo?
Kaoru: *gathering courage to speak of her feelings* Kenshin, I...
Kenshin: Kaoru-dono, you can tell me anything, de gozaru yo...de gozaru yo...de gozaru yo...
Kaoru: *head snaps up* What the heck?! *looks suspiciously at the embarrassed rurouni* What's going on, Kenshin?
Kenshin: *sheepishly takes out little recorder, which is chanting a very familiar phrase* "de gozaru yo...de gozaru yo...de gozaru yo..." *laughs unconvincingly* I-I guess it ran out of batteries, Kaoru-dono.
Kaoru: Kenshin no baka! *smashes handy shinai into his head*
Kenshin: *eyes all swirly-eyed* Orororororo...
*in the background* "de gozaru yo...de gozaru yo...de gozaru yo..."
A/N: Ooookkaayy, that's enough for now :) How was it? Funny at all? If so, please leave a review so I know weather or not to continue this insanity. Arigatou!