This is my first uploaded story, so be gentle please! However, this isn't my first fan-fiction; I have been working on something much longer and a bit more serious. This one-shot was just an idea that I couldn't get out of my head. Enjoy!

Warnings: Very very mild slash

Disclaimer: Is Harry gay? No? Then I don't own Harry Potter.

Inspired by a picture that can be found in this YouTube video watch?v=RWSgzoMPt3o&feature=related (at 2:23)

There's one thing you didn't count on

Harry was munching on a ham sandwich with pickles while listening to his two best friends bicker over the importance of mayonnaise.

"It's gross!" Hermione declared, glaring at said condiment that was provided among the rest of the food on Gryffindor table.

"No it bloody well isn't." argued Ron, "Mayonnaise is an important part of a well balanced sandwich." As if to prove his point, he took an abnormally large bite out of his chicken patty sandwich (which, of course was smothered in mayonnaise).

Hermione gagged a little, "ew..."

Harry laughed at his friends' antics; he then groaned when he heard a familiar, pompous voice interrupt the trio's dinner, "Well well well,...well well well well well well well well..."

"...Yes Malfoy?" Harry asked when the blonde didn't elaborate.

"I'm just gonna cut to the chase; I found an interesting little jinx and I believe I have found the perfect test subject for it."


"Yes." The blonde whipped his wand out and directed it towards Harry, "Girlius Gownicus!" A purple light hit the raven-haired teen too quickly for him to react.

Ron leaped up ready to assist his best mate...then he took in his friend's appearance, "The bloody hell?!"

Harry looked down at his body, raised and eyebrow and sighed, "Yeah this is so clever of you, but there's one thing you didn't count on Malfoy!"

"What's that?" the Slytherin asked with a smirk.

Harry stood up, "I look pretty damn sexy in a dress!"

Most peoples' jaws dropped when they took in the sight of the Boy-who-lived in a tight-fitting, navy blue, spaghetti strap dress that reached just above his knees. It showed off plenty of smooth, slender legs. There was a brown, unbuttoned jacket thrown over the dress; as well as long, black, high-heeled boots. The green-eyed teen's unruly hair was slightly curlier, adding to the feminine effect.

There was a thump as Draco Malfoy fainted from a particularly violent nosebleed. His fellow Slytherin, Blaise, grabbed his ankle and dragged him to the hospital wing.

Harry wore cheeky grin as the blonde was hauled away. "Eh-em!" He whirled around to see his husband (and the new DADA teacher) looming over him with a predatory look in his eyes. Harry's grin didn't falter,"Hi honey!"

"...Bed. Now."

The teen was now smiling coyly, "As tempting as that sounds, I have a sandwich to finish." He moved to return to his meal. A growl was heard and Harry yelped as he was thrown over the man's shoulder and carried off to their quarters.

"Alright Tom you win."

As you can see, this wasn't meant to be serious in any way! I hope I got good a laugh out of you guys! I promise I have better stories on the rise!