I want to apologise firstly for starting on a NEW fanfic (again...)
It's just that the others I have done have been too linear, meaning I had to stick to a particular storyline. Games like Bioshock and Skyrim already have a specified story concept, so it is hard to create a fanfic that would deviate from the original story and still be interesting.
TF2 is a little different however. It has no storyline, hence I can just blurt out whatever I feel like blurting and still make it seem legit.
So yeah. TF2 and Vocaloid Crossover. Enjoy.
Rin's eyes were glued to the window. While everyone else was going on with their meaningless conversations about how horrible the restaurant's food was, Rin's complete attention was afixiated upon the giant hole in the sky. The sight entranced her, gripping her with fear as the clouds swirled ominously about it, the little fragments of light slowly fading from their surfaces. She did not know what it was and wanted so greatly to scream for help, but the horror just struck her to silence.
"Erm, Rin?" Len asked. "Are you okay? You haven't said a word yet."
"Maybe she's still traumatised by all those pictures that Kaito accidentally exposed," Miku said dryly.
"Oi!" Kaito spat.
"Hello? Earth to Rin!" Miku yelled, tossing a leek at Rin's head which missed pathetically.
"Everyone, what date is it today?" Rin mumbled, her lips quivering.
"21st December?" Len said.
Rin ominously turned to face the entire group, her eyes wide and dark with fear. Then, she pointed to the window, causing all of them to direct their attention to it in unision.
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" Gakupo suddenly screamed, jerking up his head from his soup.
"WE ARE ALL GONNA DIE!" Gumi followed, bits and pieces of carrots flying out of her stuffed mouth.
"Hurr, what?" Meiko groaned, apparently still drunk.
"It's the end of the world, you bloody drunk!" Kaito screeched, slapping her on the shoulder.
"Ooh, the end of the world. How amusing," a voice said dryly, rolling her eyes as if she had seen that before. "Luckily I have already made preparations."
Everyone turned their heads to Luka, who was sitting at the furthest end of the dining table clad in a spacesuit.
"What the hell is that?!" Len spat.
"You have got to be kidding me," Miku said, staring at Luka in shock.
"When was I ever kidding anyone," Luka spat. She dropped a space helmet over her and yelled, "Everyone, follow me to the bunker!"
Despite having assumptions that Luka was actually trying to pull a practical joke for the first time in her life, everyone followed her out the restaurant and onto the streets. Chaos had been unleashed upon the town and everyone was running around with their arms flailing in the air. It was quite a generic apocalyptical panic scene, and the vocaloids (with the exception of Luka who was leading the way) stared at it as if it were some joke that was not in the least amusing.
After chasing after Luka for one minute (who was running exceptionally faster than all of them despite being clad in a spacesuit), the spacewoman stopped in front of a public toilet.
"Here we are!" Luka proclaimed.
"Are you serious?" Rin asked, apparently already having recovered from her trauma.
"You don't say," Luka scoffed, flashing a picture of Nicholas Cage which magically appeared in her hand for no apparent reason. "Now, everyone, we must stick together! These are dark times indeed! While the rest of the world is going to rot and die, we shall be preserved and continue the glorious legacy of the human race!"
"But we're not humans, technically," Gumi interrupted. "Vocaloids are supposed to be robots."
"What?!" Kaito screamed. "Argh, my brain is hurting from the paradox!"
"Can we just go already?!" Gakupo yelled.
"Yes, we shall," Luka whispered, unamused. "To the female toilet!"
"Are you serious?" Len spat.
Luka glared at him through her helmet and groaned, "Are you people morons or what? I've made it clear that I'm serious forty-eight thousand seven hundred and fifty-three times already. Sheesh."
"This is absurd!" Miku screamed, pulling at her pigtails.
"Can we just go?" Rin yelled.
Luka led them into the female toilet and explained that the male toilet had apparently been destroyed by her as she used it as a trap to brutally exterminate a bunch of stalkers. There were eight cubicles present, and each one had a vocaloids' name scribbled messily upon it. Luka hurriedly pushed each and every one of them into their personal cubicles before entering her own. Once inside, she pulled out a speaker and began to yell into it.
"CAN EVERYONE HEAR ME?!"
"Oh no, of course not, because I'm deaf now," Gakupo yelled from his cubicle. A scream followed and lasted for a few seconds before Gakupo spoke again weakly, "Where the hell did that come from?"
"Oh, this was originally a torture chamber I constructed," Luka explained dryly, having already turned down the volume by quite a bit. "So if any of you are going to be imbeciles, I shall not hesitate to carry out the respective procedures."
"What are we even supposed to do now?" Miku yelled.
"We are going to let that portal take us!" Luka proclaimed, and then she grinned with devious satisfaction. "All my life I have been waiting for this very moment! A portal to the New World!"
"What the hell is that?!" Len screamed.
"I think she's been watching too much Sora No Otoshimono," Rin sighed. "There's this character called Sugata who is obsessed with finding this New World thing..."
"Oi, he's awesome, okay?" Luka spat. "But anyway, the portal will be consuming us in exactly thirty seconds! So brace yourselves, people!"
"How do you even know that?" Gumi asked.
"Because I do," Luka muttered dryly.
"Hurr what am I doing in a toilet?" Meiko suddenly asked.
A momentary yelp of pain was heard before snoring filled the room.
"Stop doing that, Luka!" Kaito spat.
"Twenty more seconds!" Luka laughed maniacally, completely ignoring Kaito. "I am so thrilled!"
"Luka what is wrong with you?!" Miku screamed. "You were never like this!"
"I bet ten dollars she's been doing drugs," Rin said.
"I bet a hundred she just discovered she had extremely early menopause," Len added.
Two screams were heard again before Rin and Len said in unision, "What the hell, Luka?"
"Ten more seconds!" Luka screamed, her voice unnaturally quivering. "At last my life will be complete! I shall be queen of the New World! HAHAHAHAH!"
"Well that escalated quickly," Gakupo whispered.
"FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!"
The toilet shook violently admist the noise of terribly deafening explosions and Luka's disturbing laughter. Colours darted randomly about all of their eyes, with painful bursts of bright light every now and then. And then the situation got so chaotic to the point that I have decided to give up on describing it.
A few minutes later, the shaking abruptly stopped. All was dark, and no one dared to exit their cubicles.
"Anyone still alive?" Luka said merrily.
"No, I'm dead," Miku said.
"Wow, splendid," Luka scoffed. "Okay everyone, I have scanned the surroundings very thoroughly and it is completely safe to exit your cubicles!"
"Where the hell are we, anyway?" Gumi asked.
"The New World, duh," Luka scoffed.
"Woohoo, I'm so exicted," Rin droned.
"Is Meiko still asleep?" Kaito asked.
"I don't hear her speaking so I guess so," Len answered.
Suddenly everyone (except Luka again) was ejected out of their cubicles and they landed upon a cold stone floor. There was a great deal of broken bones and blood, accompanied by swears and curses.
"Sorry everyone, none of you looked like you were getting out," Luka muttered, shrugging. Then, she pushed a button which magically appeared in her hand and the structure of the toilet imploded upon itself.
"What the hell?!" Len screamed, nursing his broken nose.
"I'm going to kill you when I can move again, Luka," Rin snarled, the fall having broken her spinal cord and causing her to be flopped and paralysed on the floor.
"Oh you all will be fine soon enough," Luka sniggered. "If I'm not wrong, this is the place I was always looking for! I should be able to find a healing device... aha! There's one!"
"So you gonna heal all of us with... that?" Kaito said, standing up and pointing at the oblong device. It looked like a highly overdone bazooka, just that it did not seem to be used for loading any rockets.
"No, you are gonna do it," Luka said, pushing the device into Kaito's arms. "Since you appear to be the only one who can stand after that fall. Go, heal them. Make it quick."
Luka rolled her eyes. She grabbed the device from Kaito and pointed it at Miku whose face had been smashed upon the floor with bits of gore splattered in a radius. With the flick of a switch, the device emitted a blue-coloured beam which targeted itself at Miku. Kaito watched in amazement as Miku's destroyed face began to reform, all the flesh swirling and re-attaching itself into what Miku looked like five minutes ago when she hadn't been ejected yet.
"What?" Kaito gasped, blinking. "That is amazing! How did you do that?"
"I didn't do it," Luka sniffed. "The ubergun did."
"Ubergun. Use it well, comrade," Luka chuckled, pushing the device firmly back into Kaito's hands, who just stared at it.
"You heard her, get to work!" Len screamed.
Fifteen minutes later, everyone was amazingly nursed back to full health. However, their doubts had not been cleared just yet.
"Where the hell are we anyway? Is this some warehouse?" Gumi asked.
"Why does this look oddly familiar somehow," Rin asked, walking around and peering everywhere.
"You know, wouldn't it be cool if this was some fan universe?" Miku suggested.
"Fan universe?" Len echoed, raising an eyebrow.
"Like erm, maybe we just entered the world of some anime!" Miku giggled. "OH MAH GAWD I HAVE BEEN WATCHING THIS ANIME RECENTLY. It's called K. AND IT'S FULL OF HAWT GUYS! WOULDN'T IT BE AWESOME IF THIS WERE -"
"No," Rin spat. Miku glared at her, but did not retort.
"Or maybe we're in some game?" Gumi suggested. "What if we are in the world of Assassin's Creed? We would all be assassins! That would be so AWSUMM!"
"I shouldn't have gave that game to you as a birthday present," Gakupo muttered. "Where the hell is Luka, by the way?"
Luka magically appeared in the middle of the room, out of thin air.
"Sorry everyone, I was scavenging," Luka explained simply, as if she did it everyday.
"Where the hell did you come from?!" Len yelled. "You just appeared in the middle of the room like that!"
"Oh, it's this watch," Luka said dryly, pulling down her sleeve so everyone could see the watch. "It makes me invisible and stuff."
"Wait a minute," Gumi said. "The ubergun? The watch that makes you invisible? Don't tell me... we are in the world of..."
"TEAM FORTRESS 2?!" Len, Miku and Rin screamed.
"Oh my god, this game is horrible!" Len spat.
"Shut up," Rin spat back. "It's the best game ever made! ALL THE MEMES ARE AWESOME!"
"No, they're annoying!" Miku yelled. "Seriously, I still hate you for replying every single question with that bloody !"
Rin stared evilly at Miku and pouted her lips. "Nope."
"Gahhhh stop it! It gave me nightmares!" Miku screamed.
Rin just continued staring at Miku with an evil grin. "Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope."
Len whacked her on the head with a banana and sighed, "Can we all be serious for a moment? What are we supposed to do here?"
"First of all, each of you need to be of a specific class," Luka explained calmly. "You all are familiar with the classes, am I right?"
"Scout soldier pyro demoman heavy engineer medic sniper spy," Gumi blurted at light speed.
"Pfft. Addict," Miku scoffed.
"Go watch your K, yaoi girl," Gumi retorted.
"OI! LISTEN!" Luka yelled. "Okay, so I will assign a class to each of you. As many of you have already guessed, Kaito will be our medic."
Gakupo clapped loudly but then stopped as he realised he was the only one doing it.
"Now," Luka said, "I shall assign the scout class to Len because he looks like one."
"What?" Len yelled. "How does it even work that way?!"
"It does because it does," Luka scoffed. "Now go get your baseball bat. As for soldier class, I shall assign it to Miku."
"Do I look like a soldier to you?" Miku asked with annoyance.
Luka looked at her for a moment before simply saying, "Yes. Now go get your rocket launcher."
"I get a rocket launcher?! MAH GAD THAT IS AWESOME!"
"What?! I wanted a rocket launcher!" Rin snarled.
"Don't worry Rin," Luka said. "You get a flamethrower instead that can deflect rockets."
"Pyro? Well, at least it's my second favourite class."
"Well that's pleasing to hear," Luka muttered. "And as for demoman... eh wait. No, I'm going to have to change it to demoknight. That's your class, Gakupo, since you like using swords so much."
"Okay... am I supposed to say thank you?"
"When have you ever did," Luka snorted. "As for the heavy class, where's Meiko?"
"Hurr I'm here."
"Oh, what a relief. You're the heavy. Go get your minigun."
"Why didn't Meiko get to be demoman?" Rin asked. "I mean like the demoman, she's drunk and all."
"So you expect Gakupo to be heavy? No way," Luka spat. "Now keep quiet while I finish the rest. Gumi, you get to be the engineer. For once you can put those goggles to some use."
"Oh well," Gumi shrugged, "time to plan my spawncamping strategy."
"Yes, we shall look forward to it," Luka replied with great sarcasm. "And okay. We're done. All of you have a class."
"Aren't there two more left?" Rin asked. "Sniper and spy?"
"Yeah," Luka said curtly. "I shall assign myself to both."
"WHAT?!" Len screamed. "Sniping AND backstabbing?! But that's so gay!"
"Not as gay as you, shota boi," Miku muttered.
"Shut up, yaoi addict," Len spat. "Go play with your rocket launcher or something."
"Don't make me shove your baseball bat up your ass," Miku snarled.
"If you two are gonna keep doing this, I'll burn you to death," Rin snapped.
"Only that we can't die," Gumi suddenly said. Everyone stared at her, dumbfounded.
"Wait, really? Respawn works here?" Rin asked.
"Of course," Gumi said dryly. "While you all were conversing about sticking weapons into each others' orifices, I decided to commit suicide in that corner over there. Oh look, my body's still there. Interesting."
"Is it me or are you beginning to scare me like how Luka does now?" Miku whispered.
"Silence!" Luka suddenly yelled. "Okay, now that you all have your specific classes assigned to you, I am going to send you off to your quarters to have a good rest before training begins tomorrow!"
"Training?!" Kaito screamed. "NO, I AM NOT GOING BACK TO THE ARMY AGAIN!"
"Shut up Kaito, all you have to do is slack in the sickbay," Len spat. "Oh great, I'm going to be forced to run ten kilometres everyday, aren't I?"
"Actually," Luka pondered, "no."
"Yeah. Because it's 50 kilometres."
"...I am going to die," Len groaned.
"But then you'll respawn!" Rin laughed, and stopped abruptly when Len threw his bat at her but ended up hitting Kaito instead.
"DARGH! What was that for?!" Kaito screamed.
"Don't sweat it, Kaito," Luka droned. "As a medic, you have regenerative abilities."
"Meanwhile, Gumi! Build us a teleporter entrance!"
"Huh, for what?" Gumi asked. "We're not even on the field yet."
"There's already an exit built at our base. I found it just now and raided it to install all our neccessary stuff there. So, build us an entrance and we can all have some rest in our new home."
"Alright, I'm going," Gumi sighed, picking up her wrench.
"I still can't believe how awesome this is," Rin said suddenly. "THIS WILL BE SO FUN!"
"Why do you even like this game?!" Miku spat. "It's pointless! I don't see any aim to it!"
"That's the point!" Rin cheered. "That's what makes it so epic!"
"Oh gods, I'm gonna die..." Len moaned.
"Come on Len, it would be fun!" Rin giggled. "You'll agree when we get to go to war with another team!"
"I don't see how war is fun," Len spat.
"Yeah, war is full of misery!" Gakupo added. "Why do you even like this?"
"Sadist," Miku scoffed.
"Oi!" Rin yelled. "Better than yaoi!"
"It's up," Gumi suddenly said.
"Huh what's up?" Rin asked.
"RAGHAGHAGH!" Meiko suddenly screamed. Everyone glared at her and then glared at Kaito.
"What?" Kaito asked.
"Get her there first," Luka commanded. "NOW."
One by one they teleported themselves to the base, which was made entirely out of metal and painted with various shades of blue. Their rooms were lined up along a hallway, with their names scrawled atop the door to each one.
"Well, I shall see you all in the morning," Luka said with a surprisingly enthusiastic tone. "Training shall begin, and we shall be an awesome team! But for now, nights."
And with that, she disappeared into thin air.
"Why do I feel she's gonna keep doing that?" Rin asked.
Len groaned, "Shut up and go to bed."
If you are reading this, I thank you. ^^
Still really sorry about just abandoning my other stories, but I promise this one has the potential to keep on going. :)
And anyways, the vocaloids' personalities are altered slightly, so errmmm sorry again. :p