"Come for a walk with me?" Edward asked.
This is it, I thought to myself. He's going to leave me. Just the thought sent a pain so through my chest so strong that I could hardly breathe. I quickly composed myself.
I knew this was coming. He's been putting distance between us, acting odd. He thought I had no clue. But I know him better than I know myself. Even though it hurt, I can't put into words how beyond pissed it made me.
Let's do this.
"Of course." I said in an innocent voice. He gave me a weird look before walking towards the woods.
Oh hell no! Was my first thought. He is not going to leave me in the woods!
Despite my thoughts, I followed him down the path. After what seemed like ages he turned towards me, his face expressionless. I merely looked him dead in the eyes and gave him a fierce glare. I saw the confusion on his face before he straightened his mask again.
"We're leaving, Bella." he said, even his voice held no emotion.
"When you say we...?" I asked. My voice was surprisingly calm.
"I mean my family and myself."
I had already known this. What I didn't understand was why? So I asked.
"Why are you doing this?"
"I'm tired of being something I'm not. I am not human, Bella. You don't belong in my world." He must have seen that I was about to object because his next words caused the worst kind of pain I could ever experience.
"I don't want you in my world, Bella." His voice was so cold. It was so hard not to believe him. It made sense. Why would he want me, a pathetic human?
"You...Don't... Want me?" I asked in a small voice. Gosh, I sounded so weak!
He gave me a blank stare and simply said "No."
I searched his eyes for something, anything to ease the pain. What I saw made it possible to breathe.
I saw past the indifferent mask I found the same agony I felt. He was lying to me.
Oh fuck to the no! Time to call Bullshit.
I looked him straight in the eyes and in a surprisingly calm, but strong voice, I said, "You'ee lying to me."
He looked shocked but he hid it well. "No I'm n-"
"I'm not done speaking." I said in a deadly tone. The look on his face when I said that... priceless!
"I don't like being lied to. At least have the guts to tell me the truth."
He composed his mask once again and in a heartless voice he said "That is the truth. You were just a nice distraction for a while, but now I'm bored. You are only an average human after all." And who's fault is that, buddy? "Of course I'll always care for you... In a way. But this has gone on long enough."
I would have believed him, if I couldn't see how much it pained him to say it. But Gosh that hurt. However, I was also so pissed I could barely remember my own name.
He must have seen the rage in my expression because he seemed shocked. He never let his mask drop but I knew him too well to not see it.
Oh, shit's about to go down!
"You know what, Edward? Fuck you. I'm calling bullshit,"
He looked surprised by colorful vocabulary. Good.
"What do you m-" he started to ask but I cut him off.
"Gosh, how stupid do you think I am? You think I'll actually believe the shit coming out of your mouth?" I swear his jaw hit the floor. He started to speak, but I sure as hell wasn't done.
"Shut. The. Fuck. Up!" His mouth closed with an audible snap, his eyes were wide.
"I know you better than I know myself. You honestly think I can't see when your lying... or in pain?" Could vampires go into shock? "But you know what? I'm fine. It hurts like a bitch to hear you say that, but I can't stop you. I wont beg. Honestly, you just don't deserve me." I said.
Where did this strength come from? Keep going!
"I may be human, but I'm sure as hell not average. I survived almost being crushed by a van, almost getting attacked and raped, a crazy vampire trying to kill me and I'm a lot stronger than you think. I'm not so weak that I will beg you to stay, because that's just pathetic. I can turn around, walk away, and never look back. I wont lie. It's going to kill me, but I can do it. Why? Because if your willing to sit there and lie to my face, if your not willing to fight for me, you sure as hell don't deserve to have me!" The pain and shock on his face was unmistakable. I walked up to him, until we were toe to toe, and brought my hand up to where his heart was. I heard his breath catch.
Let's finish this!
"I'm willing to fight for this, for us. But I can't wait for you to be ready. I'm a danger magnet. Maybe tomorrow, Victoria will come for me," I felt the growl rumbling in his chest but I ignored it. " or I'll get mauled by a bear. It's always been this way. I've never been safe. Thank you though, for protecting my life while you were a part of it."
The agony on his face pained me, but I couldn't stop now.
"I will always love you. But I can't always be forced into what you want when you're ready. You may leave. I can't stop you. But I'm giving you this chance to fight for me... for us." I could see the internal battle he was having with himself.
I sighed. Ouch. Guess I got my answer.
"I'm someone's first priority, Edward. You obviously don't care for me as much as I thought you did. Good luck with your... distractions. Goodbye, Edward."
With that said I turned my head up, kissed his cheek, turned around (with surprising grace) and started walking away from him.
I did not cry. I was just so... tired. I needed to get home.
Now, imagine my shock when ice cold hands grabbed my waist and pulled me flush against a rock hard body.
"I'm sorry. So sorry. Please," I felt him kiss me neck. "please don't." another kiss, "I need you." Kiss. "Please don't walk away from me" more kisses.
I turned around in his arms and grabbed his face, crashing my lips into his. This kiss was full of love, hunger, passion.. desire.
I pulled back and looked into his eyes. He looked so tortured. He broke the silence first.
"I thought if I left, you would be safe and could have a happy, normal, human life. But when you spoke of Victoria," he spat out her name. " I lost some confidence. My god, I... I'm going to fight for you. You are worth it and I will always put you first." I had to smile at that. "But please... Never walk away from me... I can't bear the pain of you turning your back on me. I'll give you anything, do anything, just, please don't leave me." He was begging now.
I kissed him again. This one was slow and sweet.
"I love you. And I need you. I want you forever, But that is your choice.' I said to him. I would not force myself on him for the rest of eternity. I tried to play it cool, but this was a very important moment.
Change me, change me, Come on, dude, Change me!
He sighed and tangled his fingers in my hair and spoke while staring into my eyes.
"I just felt the most unbearable pain, thinking I lost you forever. It pains me to do this. To damn your soul. But God help me, I can't go through that again. I need you. Forever."
He pulled me to him again and molded our lips together. I barely noticed it was raining. We stayed like this, kissing in the rain, for God knows how long.
Eventually we pulled apart and headed down the trail. When we reached his Volvo I leaned against his door and he trapped me, with both hands pressed on the car on either side of my body. I played with the hem of his shirt while I spoke.
"Come to my room tonight?" I didn't even care I was getting soaked. I wanted to stay here like this forever.
"Of course " He smiled and gave me a peck on the lips before I let him get into his car.
While I was waiting for him I went inside and got ready for bed. After that I went back to my room and found him staring out my window. I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist, placed a kiss between his tense shoulder blades, and laid my head there when he relaxed.
"What's wrong?" I murmured.
He turned around, grabbed my left hand, and got down on one knee. He took a deep breath, and pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket.I gasped and let out a shuddering breath. Then he spoke.
"Isabella Marie Swan," I shivered in pleasure at the sound of my name rolling off his tongue. "I promise to love you every single moment of forever. Would you do me the extraordinary honor, of marrying me?" He opened the box to reveal the most beautiful ring. It was a simple gold band with an oval covered with diamonds on it. It was beautiful.
I could have said so many gushy romantic things, or horrible things about what people would think, but instead, I settled with whispering, "Yes."
"Yes?" he repeated, shocked.
"Yes! Yes!" I said laughing.
"Yes!"He shouted. Good thing Charlie was out late. He placed the ring on my left ring finger and kissed every finger, then my ring, before he stood and kissed my lips. He grabbed me by my waist and lifted me into the air, spinning me around laughing.
We kissed for what felt like hours. And that night I went to bed with a content smile, ready to become Bella Cullen, Edward's wife.