AN: As of right now, this will be the official version of the First Rebel. So all future chapters will be added to this version. The older version will either remain as it is or will be deleted if needed to. If it WILL be deleted well I hope you've enjoyed it because you're probably not going to see it again...unless you go to the SMBMOVIE Archives and find the First Rebel thread in the fan media section but I digress. Here it is! The REVISED First Rebel!
Koopa, you're an asshole.
Though, the odds of you knowing that are slim. Who knows: you might be thinking you're very clever. All I know is that, you hired me for dirty work, I did it, and now you jail me for being too good.
Isn't life something, I hope you know that I'm not some employee you can easily dispose. I hope you know, even as you sit in your nice office, and I'm in this piss poor excuse of a cell, that I'm coming for you. While you act oh so confident, I'll wait here.
The Rebel or "Mr. Smith" as he had come to be called, was in thought as that was all the guards would let him do. He always used to think Koopa was an ok person. Paranoid for sure, but a fine man and great advisor, but that was before Koopa labelled The Rebel a traitor upon finding blueprints for a nuclear bomb in his quarters.
Before the Rebel could so much as defend himself he was sent to the Vista Hills Asylum in the desert. During that time, he was often forced to go to counseling and interrogation sessions. His interrogators knew that he was sane and merely teased him, but the psychiatrists believed he truly needed help.
Ironically, the Rebel was thinking of today's upcoming sessions when the door opened. Two guards came in with a key to unlock the chains the kept the Rebel from escaping his bed. First, however one guard injected a serum into the Rebel that made him paralyzed so he wouldn't try to make an assault.
Ah, the standard procedure. Don't you guards ever loosen up? How's a guy supposed to escape?
While no one heard his little joke, the Rebel still laughed inside. After the Rebel was out of his chains, the guards picked up his legs and dragged them while his body was on the floor. When they were finally at the session room, the guards opened the door, and threw him inside. Of course by this point the serum had worn off and since the floor was solid ground, the Rebel was in pain when he hit it.
Well, that was a fine landing.
As he got up, a female psychiatrist walked in.
"Hello Mr. Smith," the psychiatrist said coldly, "Are we ready to begin?"
"I told you my last name wasn't Smith." The Rebel said,
"Yes, but you didn't want me to say your real name."
"I know that Miss Jones."
"Then let's begin please."
The Rebel sat down at a rectangular desk but not before he was convinced to do so by the guards' flamethrowers. Soon Miss Jones sat down as well, with that menacing stare. As the Rebel looked into Miss Jones' eyes, her cold stare made him look somewhere else.
"Now," Miss Jones said, "Before we start today's session, I wanted to ask you what you would like to begin with? We can do ink blot tests, discuss ink blot tests, or look at ink blot tests-"
"I think I'll go with ink blot tests." He said with a sarcastic grin.
"Ah excellent, I have the ink blots all ready for you!"
Miss Jones then got out the ink blot tests and showed one to the Rebel. It was obviously a question mark but the Rebel knew from experience that Miss Jones would often trick her patients into answering the obvious and so this time he naturally thought she was trying to trick him, you see unlike regular Rorschach tests, if you get the answer wrong, you get shocked.
"Uh, a cane," The Rebel guessed, and then he got shocked with a shock gun.
"Wrong Mr. Smith" Miss Jones said, "Guess it again please."
"Uh, a duplex with the sun on the bottom?!"
He got shocked again,
"Wrong again Mr. Smith," Miss Jones said, "The answer was a Question Mark."
You bitch! Ugh, I have to stay cool, I have to stay cool. Just wait it out, she won't last long.
The Rebel then got his cool and whispered "Proceed,"
Miss Jones then got out another blot test and this time it was an actual blot test that made one think.
The Rebel thought hard and said, "Two Priests fighting with pocket knifes?"
"Too Violent," Miss Jones said, as she shocked him again.
This time the Rebel was shocked so badly that he fell to the floor and was shaking as the guards picked him up and put him back in his seat.
"And as a side note, Mr. Smith, I'd prefer it if you not make up characters."
By now the Rebel was about to burst and start his plan now but the guards were still there and since the Rebel wanted this to be an easy job he just sat i his chair, watching Miss Jones grabbing another blot test. He thought really carefully this time, trying to give her a good answer.
"Any minute now, Mr. Smith," Miss Jones said,
The Rebel then cleared his thought and said, "Two bunnies jumping around."
Miss Jones looked at the Rebel with a more warmer gaze for a while before she said:
"You're obviously making that up," and shocked him again.
As the he got shocked once more, the Rebel fell to the floor again, however this time he got himself up without help and sat in his chair. Before Miss Jones pulled out another blot test, the Rebel shouted:
"I THIK THAT'S ENOUGH TRIAL AND ERROR IF YOU DON'T MIND!"
Instead of getting shocked, the Rebel actually got mercy in return.
"Very well Mr. Smith," Miss Jones said,
Miss Jones then put them away and decided to do a new session.
"Now Mr. Smith," Miss Jones said, "Let us talk about your recent dreams, it always helps to discuss what goes on in the mind."
The Rebel then smirked as the guards left the room. They obviously didn't want to hear what he had to say and who could blame them? After all whatever bullshit the Rebel said would make anyone scared. As Miss Jones got out a tape recorder the Rebel then leaned forward as Miss Jones eyed him suspiciously.
"So," Miss Jones said, "I-I'd like to hear your dreams please."
"Certainly," the Rebel said, "Should I skip the anus ripping demon or not?"
Miss Jones shocked the Rebel again.
"Leave your humour out of this please. Now let me ask you again-"
"Actually Miss Jones," the Rebel said smirking while wincing, "I'd like to ask youa question."
"Very well," Miss Jones said,
"Ok," he said, "Let's say a snotty psychiatrist tortures an innocent sane man for a long time, naturally she has done this before and thus, is surprised when he snaps and wants to do nothing but kill her. She runs but realizes no matter where she goes it seems everyone is now out to get her. Where is the safest place she could hide?"
"I...Don't know," Miss Jones said, nervously
The Rebel then grabbed the shock gun, set it to "painful" and quickly shocked her.
"Insanity of course," the Rebel said coldly, he then opened the window and made a big noise to have the guards come in.
When the guards came in, the Rebel shocked one of them, took the flamethrower from the other guard and shocked that one with the shock-gun. Then the Rebel grabbed the keys, took off the clothes of both guards, got on a guard suit, and took the other flamethrower. The Rebel then sadistically grinned as he shot Miss Jones with the flame-thrower.
He left the session room and kept walking among the corridors, he punched two guards along the way and grabbed their ID cards. Finally, after looking around for a while he found the cell he was searching for, Wario's. He unlocked the cell and found the man himself inside.
"Put these on," the Rebel ordered as he threw Wario a guard uniform.
When Wario was all dressed up, the Rebel handed him a flame-thrower.
"By the way, thanks for coming," Wario said,
"It was nothing," the Rebel said.
They then quickly left and entered the main lobby; after quickly signing out by using the stolen IDs-they of course put their fingers across the pictures of the real officers-they finally were outside at the parking area. The Rebel and Wario were now out of the woods as they sneaked in a garbage truck and drove off into the hellish desert.
"Heh," Wario chuckled, "You know, When you said you could easily escape, you meant it."
The Rebel grinned as the truck drove into the unknown as the alarms set off.