His first thought, however foolish that might be was that Leo looked different without his glasses on. Of course that was stupid – he'd seen him without the spectacles before. But seeing him so altered only served as a painful reminder for how separate the two were now.
His body would have passed easily through the table where before it would have left a nasty bruise. That was small comfort to him though as he drifted near where his former servant was sat. A small movement from a corner of the dark room alerted him to another's presence and he recognised the blonde hair of Vincent. For a second, he thought that his adopted brother had seen him, noticed his presence... but then that was impossible. He was a...? He'd read of such things of people existing beyond the grave before. He shivered at the thought. The idea made him angry, made him want to lash out and hit something... but hit what? His skin could no more touch the objects around him than it could return to life. Still, his fists clenched in phantom rage as Vincent's fingers carelessly blushed Leo's raven hair, brushing it smooth.
This wasn't why he'd come after all. He knew he couldn't be close to Leo, couldn't be seen by him. But still, he'd wanted to see him again, to see how he was. And he certainly wasn't happy about what he was seeing. A small part of him was gladdened perhaps that Leo was finally not hiding anymore behind his hair. But if he was going to wear that expression; that pained, almost manic smile fixed eerily on his face than he would much rather the fringe had stayed. It didn't seem natural to his eyes how Leo looked now as if the boy was a jigsaw with mangled pieces that wouldn't fit together. Was that... his fault? His last words came back to him, unbidden.
I'm Sorry, Leo.
Yes, he was sorry... sorry for breaking his own promises to himself, by going against his own values and becoming a sacrifice. Sorry for the fight they had never made up from. Their relationship had started from a turbulent beginning, so why should he be so surprised that it had ended the same way? But most of all he was Sorry for leaving Leo here alone, without him. He knew the things Leo had done in his absence; the people he'd hurt, the new alliances he'd formed. It saddened him to see it. Hadn't it always been Leo after all who had pushed for Elliot to build the friendship with Oz? And yet now, it was as if all that didn't matter anymore.
Please Leo... Let it end. Can't you see that the more you hurt the people around you, the more you're hurting yourself? If this is because of me leaving you, then curse me, hate me. I wouldn't blame you for it. But, don't do this. Don't turn into someone I can no longer recognise.
He turned away slightly and then his eyes fixed on a familiar object on the table he'd walked through. Was that...?
His spread his fingers over and through the worn blue cover of the book, the engraved lettering he'd read a hundred times before; laughed over and argued over. Had Leo really still kept this? It certainly wasn't from any personal preference – his servant had never thought much of the Holy Knight series. But yet... if he still had this, still kept it from back then...
A soft smile formed on his lips.