Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.


It was as shame really, this generation had such potential. Wielders of the two richest clans' bloodline, an elite medic trained by the fifth hokage herself, the ino-shika-cho trio. They had the goddamn Kyuubi for pete's sake!

He cleared his throat to reprimand them, "I am deeply disappointed in all of you. But none of you care, you care should all be ashamed of yourselves!"

Every kunoichi and a few of the others looked at their feet, while only the hardcore kids looked him right in the eye. Bad to the bone, baby.

"Did all of you really get wasted, to the point where none of you had a coherent blue what was going on? Because every single one of you in this room gave us a completely different explanation."

All was silent.

"Now unless one of you know the complete story and has evidence, you're all being locked up for the remainder of the year. And don't think you're getting off easy, your next term will start exactly on January first, twelve o'one new year's day morning."

Everyone tensed, even the jounin, those were their students, their stupid stupid students that got themselves into deep trouble no one could pull them out of. Hinata's eyes watered, what type of example was she setting for Hanabi? Even Sasuke was uneasy, this wasn't what Itachi would've wanted.

Until someone spoke, "I know what happened."

The voice was deep, so it couldn't have belonged to any of the females. But it was quiet, as though he hadn't been speaking much. All eyes were scanning the room, tilting their heads to look at...


"Was he even there?"

"Yeah man, who invited you?"

"Stop stalking us you freak!"

He twitched at their ignorance and insults. Idiots. And to think he was about to save them all. He was too nice for his own good. "I wasthere, and I know exactly what happened."

Somebody coughed "Creep." in the background, Shino scowled. "If you guys want to go to jail be my guests-"

"No!" "We were just kidding!" "Please save us!" Thats more like it.

The interrogator only shifted his feet, "Go on, and if you lie, you're getting double time."

Shino pushed his sunglasses up and began;

Flashback December first

"Sasuke! Sasuke! Come on please, we have to throw a party!" Naruto jumped around his best friend exuberantly. The Uchiha only frowned, "Dobe, no one cares about Christmas, everybody just wants presents because they're greedy."

Naruto let out a gasp, "Sasuke! How could you say that! Everybody loves Christmas!"

Sasuke winced at the volume of his blonde idiot's voice. And after a few minutes of his friend's pleas he relented, "Alright already, but I'm not helping with anything."

He didn't seem to hear him, "Ino! INO!" Naruto ran off to the Yamanaka flower shop's direction. Sasuke sighed, he already didn't like where this was going.

"A PARTY?!" The Uchiha cringed, there was a reason why the Yamanaka's weren't invited to dinner parties back when his family held them. He staggered to them.

"Is it true?" Ino squealed when he came into view, "Are you really having a party?!"

"Hn." She practically jumped with joy. "I have to go tell Sakura, I don't even know what i'm going to wear! Sakura! Sakura!" Her long ponytail bounced as she skipped to her friend.

"I guess Ino's got invitations covered," Naruto laughed sheepishly.

Sasuke's eyes narrowed, "Go find her and tell her to keep her big mouth shut, I don't want any civilians, Hyuuga's or fangirls."

He nodded and was gone without a trace.

After breaking in with a simple jutsu, Sasuke scowled at the condition of his old house, he remembered back when he was eight, how pristine everything was. The floors then spotless, were now dusty and old. He picked up a broom and began sweeping, trying not to think of the memories.

When he was done cleaning, the door rattled, probably someone trying to knock. The last Uchiha unlocked the door, peering down at the shorter Ino, "Don't just stand there! Go help Naruto carry the tree, its huge!"

The blonde shoved her way past him through the door, Sasuke was confused and angry. He said he wasn't helping with anything! And who did Ino Yamanaka think she was letting herself into his house? He trudged towards Naruto, unhappily.

Naruto was lugging the tree on the porch when he was met with a punch on the gut.

"Dobe.." he seethed.

After spitting some blood out, Naruto put both his hands up defensively, "Now Sasuke, just don't get mad it's just a tree-" Another blow, this one to the face.

He stared down at his hurt friend, cruelly smiling at him before someone shouted "Sasuke!"

Said boy looked behind him and back to Ino, "I told you to help him not beat him, and Naruto! Get up, that tree isn't going to fix itself. Where is Sakura?! SAKURA?!"

"Shut up pig, I could hear you from my house." their teammate came along, carrying pots and pans. Frustrated, Sasuke walked out of the house, "I'm leaving."

"Come back before six!" Ino called after him. He rolled his eyes, they would be lucky if he came back at all.

It was just getting dark when Sasuke came back, it was his house after all. He wasn't going to leave it alone with losers he didn't trust.

The house smelled like warm food, and was warm itself compared to the weather outside. It was also bright, brighter than the entire Uchiha compound had ever been. When he reached the door he was greeted with more or less a dozen familiar faces. What. The. Fuck. He had specifically said no Hyuugas, yet two pairs of gray eyes stared at him, one timid, the other peeved. If Neji Hyuuga was so irritated of being inside an Uchiha home, he could kindly get the fuck out.

He took a seat on one of the white chairs, frowning at how they managed to turn this place into a circus.

Ino came into the room, clutching a top hat with small white strips of paper inside it. "Okay everybody, listen up!" When everyone looked her way she smiled, "We're all going to do a secret santa, and then on the twenty fourth we'll exchange our gifts okay?"

How about fuck no. Shikamaru grouched, why did Suna have to have a sandstorm now? He missed Temari. Ino came around, handing a scrap of paper to each of them, "Don't tell anyone who you got, it's a secret!"

Shikamaru opened his disinterestedly, Sakura, he frowned, what could she want that she doesn't already have? He threw his scrap on the floor, bringing the cup to his lips and closing his eyes.

Kiba Inuzuka was elated, not only because he didn't have to spend the night doing nothing, but because of Sakura. The most beautiful girl in the leaf village. So many people loved her, Naruto, Lee, but maybe he had a chance and could outshine them tonight.

Hinata made sure to keep her distance from Sasuke, he was trouble. He must've noticed because every time she'd glance at him he would be glaring in her direction.

Tenten watched them, so typical, the rookie nine were so immature. Neji was on her level, and she really did wish the same could be said about Lee, who was shouting about the youthful joys of baby jesus.

Choji was marvelling in the wonderful food, spending no time talking and all the time eating.

"THIS PARTY BLOWS." Whoever said that was right, this was a boring waste of time. Up until that point no one had touched the sake Sasuke brought before the party. Kiba had an idea.

"How exactly do you play this again?" Sakura asked, eyeing her drink suspiciously. Kiba had distributed twelve cups filling each of them equally. It was a drinking game he had made up, "Basically like truth or dare, except if you chose to do neither, you have to drink the entire cup." Her green eyes widened, a whole cup of sake? Kiba was out of his mind.

After looking around the room and seeing no objections he called, "Alright, now everybody get in a circle." They reluctantly did, murmuring to each other.

Once they were settled, Naruto grinned, "Who's first?"

"Why don't you start?" Ino prodded from across him.

He gave an arch look, "m'kay, Ino, truth or dare?"

She bit her tongue, she didn't mean her! "Dare." Ino was no coward.

The taller blonde raised an eyebrow, "I dare you to take your shirt off."


Naruto rubbed his, now red, cheek, muttering "Cheater." Since she didn't take a sip of her cup.

The other's laughed and continued, "Mm, Neji," his eyes narrowed, "Truth or dare?"

The Hyuuga prodigy sighed, he was too old for this. He took a gulp from his cup, and surprised the group when he was finished. Neji fixated his eyes around the room, "Sasuke, truth or dare?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Truth." Nobody was making him do anything.

"Who here has the nicest rack?" Was Neji really drunk already? Idiot.

He twitched at the question but then smirked, "Your cousin."

Hinata found all eyes on her, or rather, on her chest. Her head spun, and then she was out like a light. Sasuke was at least expecting Neji to come at him, maybe disable a few chakra points, but no, the brunette only filled his cup to the brim with sake.

Sasuke shook his head, how was the branch member supposed to protect the heir? "Somebody wake her up, Naruto, truth or dare?"

"I dare you to pole dance."

The blonde smirked, "Only if Ino helps me." Ino smiled, she had no problem with that.

They were all engrossed in their dancing that the game sort of ending on its own, everyone eventually doing their own thing.

Hinata, still a bit dizzy, took to staring at her cousin. It was quite odd, Neji trying to flirt with Tenten, "So like I know you like weapons but are you into that kinky sort of shit? Like BDSM?"

Her face paled when she heard Tenten's reply of "I've never really tried it, but I'm willing."

That was the last anybody saw of them.

Lee was trying fruitlessly to get Sakura to dance with him. "Please? Just one dance?"

The pinkette sighed frustratedly, "I told you already, I'm not a dancer."

"I'll teach you." Kiba's voice came in, then they were dancing too.

Choji looked around the room, he didn't really have anyone to talk to, with Shikamaru sleeping, or possibly unconscious from alcohol poisoning. And he had the feeling everyone kinda hated him, so he stayed alone in the corner, having ate all the food.

Hinata was caught staring at Ino and Naruto dry humping each other, "Enjoying yourself Hyuuga?"

She frowned at the familiar deep voice, Sasuke.

Once he realized she was giving him the silent treatment, he taunted, "Must be hard, watching the one you love be with someone else."

Hinata bit her lip, what did he know? She went to pour herself a drink, maybe that would distract her. And hopefully make him leave. "I wouldn't drink that if I were you."

"Yeah? Well you're not me," she caught herself saying, staring up at his face fiercely, "so stop worrying."

The heiress took a small sip, immediately regretting it when her mouth met with the bitter taste, she went to walk away, hoping to spit it out, before something caught her arm.


He had his eyes closed as he uttered through clenched teeth, "I didn't say it because I was worried about you, don't flatter yourself."
"So why did you say it?" Hinata was feeling bold tonight..

The taller boy's dark eyes narrowed to slits, "Because I didn't want you forgetting tonight." Suddenly his hands her on either sides of her cheek and the next thing she knew, their lips met.

She remembered Ino once told her the first kiss is always the most memorable. And she was right.

Kiba saw that, and believe me, it took all his self control to not beat the shit out of Sasuke Uchiha. He then noticed Sakura place both hands on his shoulders, and leaning in to whisper, "You're really sweet, thanks for helping me decorate."

Reflexabley pulling her closer, he muttered, "Don't mention it, I had fun."

"Well, good." she smiled, and got on her tippy toes to kiss him.

Neither of the blonde's missed that, and wanting to be in the "in crowd" they kissed too.

Neji and Tenten probably would've too, if they weren't up on the roof getting shitfaced.

It was pretty heartbreaking, watching everyone happily kiss, Lee took to singing- er screaming, "JOY, GLORIOUS YOUTH, JOY JOY. LOVE AND PEACE TO THE WORLD."

Until someone threw their shoe and knocked him out cold, two down, ten left. Assuming Tenten and Neji haven't frozen outside in the cold.

Shino watched them distastefully, with both squad members occupied, he had no one to talk with. Choji had fallen asleep happily. He was pretty sure he just heard a cracking outside, Tenten probably fell and broke something. Hinata and Sasuke were out of his sight. Must've been upstairs doing the nasty. At least they had some decency about it, unlike Ino and Naruto who were shamelessly gnawing at each others skins. Disgusting. Kiba, surprisingly, kept it clean with Sakura. Funny, he seemed like the first to ruin a nice girl like her.

Shikamaru and Lee were both out of it.

The sake was left unoccupied at the table. Tempting him. Calling him.

Shino clutched the bottle uneasily, he took one last look at everyone there, and shook his head.

Bottoms up.

He took a large breath, having explained all that in first person perspective. Shino was also still trying to get over his massive hangover from last night.

"And that's the complete and honest truth?" Ibiki commanded.

Naruto nodded, "Yeah I think its all coming back to me."

"I must've gotten a black eye when you pushed me off the roof Neji." Tenten mused, rubbing her eye. Neji twitched, "Yeah, maybe."

After sharing a look with the others, Ibiki nodded, "Alright then, I hereby declare this interrogation over, and you can all go home and enjoy the holidays."

Everyone cheered, until Kiba spoke up, "Well, thats really good and all but, if Shino said I didn't do anything last night, then..where are my pants?"

Akamaru came into the room, vomiting what looked like black cloth.

"Umm, Kiba.."

I couldn't help but end this on a funny note. It is a humor story after all. I really do hope it seemed mysterious because that's like, my favorite genre. I've always wanted to do a suspense mystery horror story with rich people and a dinner party and a murderer in the house. Cliche as frack. But whatevz
I am so grateful that you guys enjoyed this :D Gives me hope

OH! andddd, this was supposed to be uploaded yesterday because Id be damned if I couldn't give you guys a Christmas present after I promised before Christmas. Ok, so I don't use microsoft word because I hate it and it seems i cant even spell "monday" right with out having to capitalize the M. So I use Google Docs. love it. I can spell Inoichi and they still accept it as a real word. ok. Now, what I do, is I copy and paste everything I just wrote on docs, because fanfiction doesn't support google drive. But last night, none of that was working and it was really late and I hate internet explorer and it took forever,jkfdngejvre I went to sleep frustrated.