Self Sabotage.

After almost two weeks in the hospital Jake thought he would be glad to be somewhere, anywhere, else. Unfortunately, the heavily guarded hotel he and Sherry were being put up in felt just as much like a prison as the hospital had. They were still being treated for their injuries and required for a few more interviews before their official debriefing. Jake rolled off the bed he'd been attempting to get back to sleep in. He had not taken well to being told what to do. Hell, he couldn't figure out why he didn't just leave.

The sharp stab of pain in his ribs reminded him subtly. He couldn't force his way out in his current state, not a chance. Besides, he had unfinished business to take care of. He still owed Redfield a little chat for starters... and then there was Sherry.

Thinking about the blonde woman who was probably sleeping in the room right next to his own right now brought out a feeling in him he wasn't quite comfortable with. It reminded him too much of sleepless nights worrying about his mother. Which therefore indicated that for the first time in years he actually cared about something other then himself. And Jake Muller was not sure how he felt about that. So he had decided to keep it simple. For now, being around Sherry Birkin made him feel good. So Jake decided to do what he did best and let his id take over and make his decisions for him for the time being. Which was why he picked up his phone, moved over to his window and opened up the blank screen to send a text to the girl next door.

"You awake?" it read.

After a few long minutes his phone vibrated in his hand. "I am now. What's up?"

"Can't sleep. Feel like a caged animal in this place." Jake responded, leaning his head against the coolness of the window. It was a quiet, still night. The kind of night that always put him on edge. He was waiting for something to happen. A scream in the dark, the lick of a flame in the distance, gunfire... hell.

"Open your window."

Frowning at his phone Jake decided to follow Sherry's instructions and pushed the window wide enough that he could lean out. They'd been given rooms on the top floor and Jake gazed down at the dark street below, scowling at the sight of two armed guards beneath the windows before he heard a noise beside him. He smirked as Sherry rested her chin in her hands as she too leaned out just enough that they could see each other.

"Hi." she smiled, the cool breeze ruffling her messy hair.

"Hey. I woke you huh?" Jake asked with the hint of an apology in his voice. Sherry shrugged at him.

"I think I got enough sleep at the hospital. How're you feeling?"

Jake realised that in his topless state she could see the full glory of his multicoloured ribs. "The swelling's started to go down, thank god. I was worried my face would never be pretty again."

Sherry chuckled and cocked an eyebrow. "Don't worry Jake, I'm sure women everywhere will still fall under the spell of your charms."

Jake knew it. He wondered if she knew it to. They were flirting. He watched her drum her fingers against her cheek. There wasn't a mark on her, the effects of her concussion were still there though. He wondered if that was the reason for her behaviour. A few weeks ago she'd been all business, hell-bent on saving him and the damn world.

"So... you don't think I'm pretty anymore?" he teased, crossing his forearms on the edge of the window to give him some support.

Sherry threw him a withering look. She wasn't going to play his little game. "Is this why you woke me up? You were having a melt down over your looks?"

Jake shook his head and ran a hand over his short hair. "Nope. Like I said, I don't sleep well in cages."

"You're not in a cage Jake. You're safe here."

"I'm trapped." Jake pointed out, gesturing the guards below them.

"They're here to protect us until we get back to America-"

"Back to America? Who said I was going?" Jake interrupted, stupefied by her words.

Sherry blinked at him a few times. She'd just assumed... "Well, until we're done here. Then I guess you'll be able to go wherever you like." she quickly corrected. Why had she thought he'd want to go to the States with her? He was a mercenary after all, but for some reason Sherry had begun to see him as... well, maybe as a partner. He had helped them save the world, he'd given his blood for the world in more ways then one. She was very aware of how he was studying her face and quickly made sure it was as unreadable as possible. "You could, if you wanted to you know. What were you planning to do?" she asked, trying to keep her voice under control as a deep sense of disappointment came over her.

"What? Go the U S of A? Nah, it's too..."

"Too what?" Sherry urged, unable to keep the aggravated tone hidden. Jake shot her a look as she turned her head away and gazed at nothing in particular in the distance. "Never mind. You can do what you like."

"I know I can," Jake said quietly, unsure exactly how the light hearted conversation had turned so... sour. "I just don't think I'd feel at home in America."

"Oh." Sherry said blankly. Truthfully she was just as confused as Jake was as to why she felt so offended. It wasn't like it mattered. Her mission was over. Jake was no longer her concern and he certainly wouldn't be any of her business when she returned home. After all, it was job done. Congratulations. File the paper work and on to the next assignment.

"I'm going back to bed." Sherry suddenly told him, pushing herself away from the window. Jake had to lean to the point where he was in danger of falling clean out his own window just to keep her in his view.

"Was it something I said?" he asked, confused by her sudden mood swing.

"No... I just... still get tired quick. Goodnight Jake."

With that she snapped her window shut and drew the curtain, leaving Jake to stare as her shadow disappeared. What the hell was that about? He wondered. Did she love her country that much, even after everything it had done to her, that she'd get pissed just because he didn't want to go there?

No. He shook his head as he ducked back into his room. There had to be more to it then that. And there was no way he was waiting until morning to find out what her problem was. Not even bothering to throw on a shirt or shoes Jake opened the door to his room, peered down the long empty hall and stepped out. He paused in front of Sherry's door just for a moment, listening to the silence coming from inside. Perhaps she really had gone back to bed, he thought. Oh well. He knocked loudly, urgently, on her door. As he knew she would, she ignored him.

"Sherry..." he called just loud enough to be heard through the wood. "Come on, open up."

After a few more minutes of silence Jake lifted his hand to knock again, only to have the door swing open and be filled with image of a very annoyed looking young woman. "I said I was tired Jake."

Jake realised his hand was still raised to knock and slowly brought it down to his side. "Yeah. I heard you. You just seemed pissed off and I want to know why."

Sherry rubbed a hand against her forehead and looked at him with an unreadable expression. "I'm fine. Okay. Just go back to bed. I'll speak to you in the morning." She made to close the door only to jump back in surprise when Jake jammed his bare foot in the way, a hand slamming against it.

"Don't do that." He hissed at her, "Don't push me away. Not after everything..."

Sherry looked at the man with wide eyes. She'd never seen him look so... desperate. Was he that upset because she was in a mood with him? "Fine." She grumbled. "Come in."

Jake closed the door quietly behind him as Sherry flicked on the light. He'd surprised himself with his actions, but he didn't want to spend the rest of the night failing to sleep because he was thinking about her. If there was a problem then they needed to get it out in the open. He followed her through the small hall and into the cramped living area. Sherry had sat herself down on the sofa and tucked her bare legs beneath her, pulling her night-dress down to cover as much of them as she could. Jake paced the room a little before sitting himself on the arm of a chair opposite her and watched her expectantly. "Well?"

Sherry frowned at him. "What? What do you want me to say?" She knew she was being unfairly short with him, yet she couldn't help herself. Part of her wanted to make him walk out the door and not come back. The other part felt like glowing simply because he was in the same room with her.

"You can tell me why you went from flirting with me to acting like a snarky bit- er, woman."

Sherry glowered at him. "I wasn't flirting with you Jake. My god you have such an ego!"

"Maybe," Jake conceded, "Probably why you not thinking I'm pretty doesn't bother me. What does bother me is that you're acting like I'm doing something wrong? What did you think was going to happen after all this, super girl?"

"I don't know!" Sherry sighed heavily and began to play with the edge of the sofa, "I... I just thought after everything that you might have changed. You might want to do something better with your life."

This time it was Jake's turn to be offended. "Changed? I didn't realise I needed to."

"You know what I mean Jake. You said it yourself after we killed that monster that chased us over the globe. I saved you."

"So that means I owe you something? That I should start behaving like... who, Kennedy? Redfield?" Jake had stood from his seat and taken a step toward Sherry, who rather then shrinking back into the sofa under his cold glare merely lifted her chin and tried to stare him down with her own.

"No, of course not! But you could do so much good, you're so talented and brave. You... you could come work for the D.S.O..."

Jake's glare turned to a mixture of amusement and disbelief. "Seriously? You think I'd want to work for an organisation like that?"

"What's wrong with it?" Sherry asked, her voice adopting a slight shriek of indignation.

"I'm not being told what to do or where to go or how to live my own damn life. Not by anyone-"

"So you'll go back to being a mercenary. Killing for money!"

"Don't act so high and mighty Sherry! You work for people with their own dark secrets, who use you. At least I'm honest about who I am and what I do!"

"Bullshit! You're running Jake. You're running because for once in your life you might have to deal with the idea that you're worth more then being a gun for hire!"

"I'm not worth anything to anyone unless they want something from me! You think your new boss gives a shit about me beside my blood. No!"

"You're worth something to me!"

They were standing toe to toe, not having realised how they were drawn to each other even as they began to scream in each others faces. Not until Sherry said the words that felt like a kick in the gut to Jake.

"Really?" he asked, his voice now almost a whisper, "Because you sure as hell don't act like it."

He watched as the shock of her own words, having caught them both off guard, bled from her face. Sherry had meant to tell Jake that he had to make himself worthy, find a better place for himself. What she had not meant to do was open up the idea to them both that perhaps her disappointment in him came more from the thought that this decision meant she would never see him again. And that it didn't seem to be bothering him nearly as much as it did her.

"I..." was all she managed. Jake stepped even closer, which was near impossible considering he was close enough to see every fleck of blue in her eyes.

"You... what?"

Sherry found herself swallowing nervously as her heartbeat suddenly began to thump hard against her chest. Why had she said that? Why couldn't she take a step back as Jake placed a warm hand against the swell of her hip and stroked a short path down her side with his thumb. "I just meant..."

Sherry was finding it increasingly hard to think as Jake dipped his head so close that she could smell his skin, feel his breath against her cheek.

"Tell me you don't want me to leave." Jake suddenly asked without a trace of arrogance or confidence to be heard. He sounded as if he was pleading with her. All rationality told Sherry that she knew what was about to happen if she gave in. She also knew that if he had truly made up his mind then there was nothing that could persuade him otherwise. Right?

"I don't... I don't want you to go." she told him, pressing her forehead against his jaw. She heard a sharp intake of breath and felt another hand place itself on her hip. Jake had to stoop to kiss her. He delighted in the tiny gasp she gave when his mouth pressed against hers and immediately sought entrance with his tongue. Jake was not a tender man. Not one for softness and gentle kisses. He pushed her back toward the sofa and lowered her on to its rough cushions, climbing on top of her without breaking the kiss. Sherry's hands had wound their way around his neck, her legs opening by instinct to allow him to lay between them.

Her rational mind had stopped working it seemed. Especially when his hands had travelled from her hips to her thighs and slowly dragged the cloth of her night dress up to her middle. She felt the blush appear when she remembered she hadn't worn any underwear to bed. This didn't seem to be a problem for Jake however, who only moaned loudly against her mouth when his fingers found the warmth of her body that made Sherry buck against him.

She had been craving this, she realised as he began to slide one finger deep inside. She had been denying herself these thoughts of him ever since that night in the cabin. She breathed his name as her head tilted back against the arm of the sofa, exposing the flesh of her throat. Jake captured it greedily, kissing and sucking at the hot skin as the palm of his hand pressed against her. He wasn't going to be able to hold back for much longer. He hoped she knew that.

"The bed..." Sherry suddenly gasped against his shoulder. "Please... take me to bed."

Never in all his life had Jake been so turned on by the request. He lifted her with ease. He'd happily have continued where they were, but Sherry wasn't just some girl he'd met and planned to never think about again. If she wanted a bed, he'd take her to it. He'd do just about anything she asked right now...

He sat on the edge of the bed with Sherry cradled in his lap. She crawled over him to straddle his lap and hesitated for just a second before slowly pulling her dress up and over her head. Jake followed the disappearing hemline with hungry eyes as each piece of her was exposed. Dropping the clothes on the floor Sherry couldn't help but feel exposed under his look, as approving as it was. She made to cover her chest, suddenly shy. She had done this before only twice. Both times had been meaningless, dull experiences. But the way Jake ran his hand down her bare back while the other placed itself in her hair and pulled her to him told her he knew was he was doing at least.

Flipping them over so Sherry lay on the mattress Jake kissed his way down her jaw, between her breasts... he could take her right now and be satisfied all too soon. No. He wanted to savour every part of this. He wasn't quite sure how it had happened or even if it was a good idea. But when he heard the gentle moan she gave as his mouth began to kiss her in more intimate place he really didn't care. Fingers scratched and pinched at his bare shoulders, but it only spurred him on as Sherry bucked her hips uncontrollably. When he glanced up he saw was her head had roll to one side, teeth glinting in the dim light from the living room as she bit the edge of a pillow. It was enough for him. Stopping even as Sherry groaned in protest Jake brought himself to his knee's above her and hooked his fingers into his sweats. Sherry watched him discard his own clothes and propped herself up on her elbows. There was no going back now.

Jake lowered himself onto her, steadying himself with one hand as the other took a firm grasp in her hair. He looked at her questioningly for a moment. Sherry nodded, unable to stop the whimper as he pressed himself against her... and then inside. She cried out in sheer delight. In one swift movement he was inside, and then pulling away only to thrust back again. Sherry fell back against the bed, already pushed close to the edge. Their pleasure was born of a long ignored need. Jake pressed his face against her chest, his teeth grazing the flesh. He had to focus on keeping his pace slow enough that this didn't end too soon. It was hard though, especially since Sherry was pushing her hips in time with his.

"You're killing me super girl." he said against her skin. Sherry made an unintelligable sound in response. Jake lifted his head to look at her flushed face, both his hands capturing her wrists and forcing them high above her head. He had stopped his movement inside her as they both simply watched each other. Usually this was the part where Jake got himself off and disappeared. He wasn't entirely sure how to go about making sure Sherry was getting as much out of this as he was. His expression of uncertainty went misread by Sherry, who lifted her head as best she could while pinned by him and placed a soft kiss on his lips. She tried to pull back, only for Jake to follow her and keep the connection going. Unlike before his tongue gently probed her mouth, rather then plundering it mercilessly. Sherry felt her body shiver as the kiss became agonizingly slow, yet she couldn't stop. This man was like oxygen to her. She needed him.

Eventually their bodies began to rock together once more, slower, more careful then before. Sherry could feel every part of him, and Jake felt more then the usual arrogant glow of triumph over another as he made her gasp and squirm beneath him. No one had ever done this for her before, he could tell. And no woman had ever made him feel... hell, made him feel anything other then pleasure when they were under him. Yet the look in Sherry's eyes as he released her arms and they immediately wrapped around him, holding on her dear life as she felt something build inside her. She repeated his name like a mantra, biting into his shoulder before collapsing in a writhing heap as Jake quickened his pace just enough to bring them both to a breathless finish.

By the time Sherry's senses came back to her Jake had already rolled off her enough not to crush her beneath his weight. Their legs were still entwined, his arm thrown over her middle. She turned to look at him and found him watching her with a slight frown.

"What?" she asked, a little startled. Had she done something wrong?

Jake exhaled sharply and twitched his lips in a ghost of a smile. "That was unexpected." He told her a little too casually.

Sherry suddenly felt very aware of her nakedness. And Jake's. She snapped her head back so she was staring at the ceiling before trying to untangle herself from him. Something had disappeared from her now. She felt a relief within her, her need had been satisfied. Yet where a sense of fulfilment should have been there was only... sadness. She felt a sting in her eyes and forced away the lump in her throat as Jake sat up in the bed, sheets falling around his legs to keep him covered.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

Sherry shook her head as she stood, moving to the bottom of her bed she found her dress and pulled it back on before turning to face him. Seeing him, bare-chested, eyes filled with confusion... "We shouldn't have done that." she told him in a broken whisper. Jake's expression immediately blanked out. He watched her coldly for a moment before throwing the covers away and pulling his own clothes back on. Sherry watched him wordlessly. Wasn't he going to say something? Didn't he understand what they'd just done? Sherry could have continued ignoring how she felt around him before and eventually she knew it would have gone away. But now... god, now she knew how he felt. How he tasted.

Jake made to leave, pausing in her doorway so his body threw a shadow over Sherry's face. He turned his head just enough that she could see his heavy-lidded eyes. "I'm sorry." he told her. And he was. He should have known better then to follow his impulses. Sherry wasn't like that. And he knew he'd just done more damage to their friendship then was repairable. With that he left, half hoping she would try to stop him. But what difference would it make, he thought as he closed the door to him own dark room. She had her path to follow, he had his. They could have kept in touch, but now... knowing she'd only disapprove of his choice to go back to his old ways, to the only way of life he knew, it was a bad idea. Especially since every time he closed his eyes he could see her. See her flushed face, teeth biting hard on the pillow...

He threw himself on his bed. Never had sex been so good and left him feeling so... empty. No. He felt something. Regret. Sherry had been the only person to see him as more then a thug, a heartless bastard. And he'd just thrown that away just because she made him feel better about himself. He wondered what she was doing now, if she was back in that bed feeling just as shitty as he was. Pressing his hands over his eyes Jake mentally kicked himself. This was exactly what he'd meant. He really was worthless. He couldn't get something as simple as friendship right without fucking it up.

Rolling onto his front he buried his head into his pillows and tried to will unconsciousness to take over him. He couldnt' stay around here much longer. Tomorrow he'd insist that he needed to leave. He co-operate, get his money and disappear before he could do any more damage. Yes. That would be best.

Except... an idea came to him. Perhaps he could still do one little thing to show he had changed... just a little.

A few days later, Jake Muller watched as a plane flew high into the sky and thought about the woman it carried on board. They'd avoided each other the last few days, so he hadn't been able to tell her in person about his change of heart. Instead he put it in a message, and hoped she'd understand his meaning.

Sliding his phone into his pocket Jake pulled out his glasses and placed them over his eyes. The sun beat down on his back as he kicked the bike beneath him to life. He wasn't sure where he was headed, only that the open road could take him wherever he wanted to go. Maybe, in time, he'd be able to see Sherry again and tell her he was more than just a walking gun now. He'd found himself a new purpose in life and maybe, just maybe, he'd feel worthy of a girl like her.

High in the sky Sherry couldn't help the small smile on her lips as she read Jake's message. She'd so wanted to tell him she didn't want to go without him, had even stood outside his door that morning fighting with the urge to see him once more. Sitting back in her seat she clutched the phone to her chest and gazed from the window. He hadn't taken the money. For the first time he'd done something out of the goodness of his heart without being pushed into it. She hoped he'd find something better out there for himself, even if she couldn't help him find it. Putting away her phone she decided to keep his message saved to her phone. Somehow she knew this wasn't it for them. She might not like it, but she was just going to have to wait for him to be ready. And when he was she'd be there. She just hoped he didn't take too long.


A/N: Been struggling to write lately and I've been dying to start some RE6 fic. So... this was born. Not 100 percent happy but it's just a way to get my brain to start working again.

If anyone wants to know what an "id" is, google it.

Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to the Resident Evil franchise.