Ben Daniels found Alex in the bathroom of his flat after coming back from an easy mission. Alex had left the pleasures a month after joining them. Then became an official agent for MI6. Alex never spoke about his missions, no matter how much ben tried to talk to him about it. But today ben found Alex crying in the bathroom. "I killed them ben" Alex raped, his voice hoarse.

"Who Alex? Tell me"

"So many people ben, I killed them and now they're all in my head now, why can't they get out of my head!" Alex shouted

Ben stepped forward trying to be as gentle as possible "how many Alex? How many people?"

Alex stopped sobbing and looked at ben with those brown eyes that got a little colder and more emotionless every time he went away, but now the usual cold calmness was gone an d was replaced by every emotion he hid terror, hurt, hate, and fear there was so much fear. Of what ben thought, maybe his enemies. But it wasn't his enemies that scared Alex it was himself; he was killing people so easily, so without thought it filled him with terror.

"How many?" ben tried again

Alex looked away "I don't know ben, that's how bad it is, I've lost count. There are too many, even if they deserved it too many..." his voice trailed off.

"Alex tell me everything" in the most commanding but gentle voice he could muster.

Alex sighed and looked his way "it all started for me when my uncle died…."