IMPORTANT: I planned this story back in summer and about a month ago my little sister was coincidently diagnosed with the exact condition that Edward has, so this story hits very close to home and I've finally decided to dust off the cobwebs and allow you all to read it.

Although this is something that I have to face daily, I am still very new to the subject of Autism and all the spectrums, so please don't attack me for the tiniest mistake that I might make. This is a story of fiction and so sometimes things might not seem as plausible if it were in real life, you get me?

Disclaimer: Everything related to 'Twilight' is all owned by Stephenie Meyer, Goo-Goo Dolls own 'Iris' and I own any made up character you come across and the plot.


And I don't want the world to see me,
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand.
When everything's made to be broken,
I just want you to know who I am

'Iris' – by, Goo-Goo Dolls.


Chapter one.

The smashing of china and raised voices broke Esme out of the daze she had fallen into and she went into the living room to see what the problem was. Standing at the doorway she saw her eldest son, Emmett, using his arms in defence as swinging punches came from her youngest son, Edward.

"Hey, hey, hey – Edward, calm down." Esme tried her best with calming words, but he ignored his mother's comfort and continued to do his best to punch his brother. It's not an easy case of pulling Edward off his brother, because, even though Esme isn't a small woman, her sons still stand at least half a foot taller and they are both muscly guys.

"Fuck off, man!" Emmett managed to get his hands on Edward's shoulders and used all his strength to push his brother away. Not expecting the force, Edward fell back, narrowly missing the wooden table behind him. "Jesus, you're insane!"

"Emmett." Esme scorned. She doesn't like to take sides, but they all know perfectly well that Edward can't control his temper and it isn't his fault.

"What? He's not normal!"

The angry nineteen year old then transformed into a timid child, not completely understanding the situation he was in, and only noting the pain in his backside. With teary eyes, Edward stood up and ran out of the room, desperately seeking security in his room, all alone. It has been almost ten years since his diagnosis with Autism (Asperger Syndrome to be precise) and even though they have had help with psychiatrists, therapy and have even found a special college for him to attend, every day is just as challenging for Edward, his family and anyone he encounters.

He didn't answer when Esme knocked at the door, but she entered anyway. She found Edward sitting cross legged on his bed, staring at the mattress with a bright green blanket around his shoulders; he rocked backwards and forwards slowly, not even responding to his mother's entrance.

"Do you want to tell me what happened, Edward?" No answer. "Did Emmett do something that you didn't like?"

Edward stared at the stray thread coming off his shirt and paid all his attention to pulling it free. "He ruins everything…" His voice was tight and laced in hate.

"What happened?" Trying her hardest to look after her clearly upset son, Esme perched on the edge of his bed, but said son shuffled backwards, to get further away.

"He took my sandwich…" Edward spoke so quietly, it was hard to hear what he said. "I made that sandwich for me because I was hungry and he took it and dropped the plate so it smashed."

Esme's facial expression showed how sad she was to hear his side – it's something that brother's do to tease one another, yet Edward didn't understand that Emmett was only teasing. He also couldn't decipher how his mother was feeling, and so went for the most obvious emotion to him. "Why are you so angry at me?!" He punched the bed hard with both fists, tears fell onto his lap.

"I'm not angry at you, sweetheart."

"Yes you are!"

Esme knew she was fighting a losing battle and chose to leave the situation, although unwillingly. "You stay here and calm down and I'll call you when dinner is ready, okay?"

"I don't want any stinking dinner." Again, Edward spoke more like a petulant child than a nineteen year old.

"Well you might change your mind later on." And with that, she left the room.

Edward is a very misunderstood being. Growing up everybody thought he was a spoilt child who lashes out if he didn't get his own way, or who you'd see standing in the school yard all by himself and think 'he's weird' so you'd look for a new friend to make. But if you are one of the lucky few who Edward befriends, you'd see that he has the biggest heart and you just need to realise which way to act around him so as to not press any buttons or infuriate him.

It's because of his difficulty in reading facial expressions and emotions that's makes Edward social and communicative abilities with someone he doesn't know so much harder, this leads to anxiety and stress and voila, you have a short temper on your hands. These are not his only symptoms, but they are what cause him the biggest problem in everyday life.

Apart from his immediate family, there is only one other person who Edward trusts enough to talk openly to. And her name is Tanya.

EdwardAMC: Hello.

TanyaBaby09: Hey sweetie! How are you? :)

The two have never met, but they talk daily and Tanya promised Edward she would visit him soon. And she is his only friend; he needs her comfort like it is air.

EdwardAMC: Not very good.

TanyaBaby09: :( sorry to hear that. Want to tell me what happened?

EdwardAMC: Emmett ate my snack I punched him and he pushed me over. I hurt my butt, but it is okay now. He wasn't even hungry and I made that sandwich for me and not him.

TanyaBaby09: He doesn't understand you, precious. But I do, you can always come to me :)

EdwardAMC: I know.

TanyaBaby09: What are you plans for the summer?

EdwardAMC: Don't know. You should come to my house.

TanyaBaby09: Yeah, I'd love to, babes!

EdwardAMC: Cool.

TanyaBaby09: I have to go, but I'll talk to you later okay, babes?

EdwardAMC: Yeah. Bye.

TanyaBaby09: Bye! X

It doesn't matter where Tanya lives; a friend is a friend and that is all that Edward needs.


Dinner that evening went smoothly until Esme mentioned what the summer holidays held for everyone. She had been asked to renovate an old farm house in Vermont, which would mean having to spend almost half the holidays over there, and with her husband, Carlisle, working long shifts at the local hospital, there was only one thing Emmett was sure to be doing.

"I'm not being no fucking babysitter."

Carlisle cleared his throat, "I'm sorry, Emmett – we don't like how things have planned out, but there is no other option."

"Argh, come on! He's old enough to wipe his own ass when you're at work, dad. I have plans this summer!"

Although, technically, that is true, the last time Edward was left alone he managed to burn the kitchen down. Literally.

He was hungry (it is seldom that he isn't!) and saw an appetising pasta sauce in the cupboard. The pasta was boiling nicely and he was heating up the sauce when some splattered onto the kitchen counter. The mess didn't sit well with Edward, who grabbed a cloth to mop it up with. Unfortunately the corner of the cloth was left too close to the flame…

Since then, Esme and Carlisle haven't been too keen on leaving him alone. But they don't like putting all the responsibility on Emmett either.

"Maybe we could get one of his friends to -."

"—He doesn't have any friends, Carlisle." The two conversed in private.

"Well they're all back from college for the summer, surely they'll be someone he knows from high school who could help out."

As much as she loves her husband, Esme really wants to slap some sense into him sometimes. "Just because he knew them at high school doesn't mean they're friends. Edward is only going to feel comfortable around those… he trusts…" A brilliant plan came to mind. "Actually, I think I might have an idea…"


"Dad? I'm home!" Bella called out to her father whilst struggling through with her bulging suitcases.

Heavy footfalls were heard on the staircase, "Bells!" Charlie, her father, cheered, bringing his only child in for a much anticipated hug. "How's college going?"

"It's going great, thanks. Top in all my classes…"

"Adda girl! I'm ordering pizza for dinner that okay with you?"

After living in Seattle for a year, Bella noticed that her father's eating habits hadn't changed at all. "That's fine with me. I'm going to put my stuff away."

"Oh, hold on a second, Bells." Charlie called when Bella was already half way up the rickety stairs. "You have a message from Esme Cullen – you know The Cullens, right?" Who doesn't know Forks' richest family? Bella wanted to add, but simply nodded her response instead. "Yeah, well she's left a message on the phone just check it out when you can."

"Will do – thanks, Dad."

It took Bella just under an hour to get all of her clothes put away, the bed sheeted up and her room made to look like her room once again. Once everything was done, Bella went to check the awaited phone message.

"Good evening, Bella, this is Esme Cullen phoning. I was wondering if it's possible for you to give me a call back once you get this? I have a proposal for you…"


Everything that Edward did/does in the future is based on my sister (expect she's 11, not 19). I know this doesn't seem much right now, but it's just because the story has barely started. If you would like to read more then please tell me; I'm a little hesitant, only because it's so personal to me.