Disclaimer: That which claims disses.

A/N: I was in the neighborhood, and I thought I'd just drop by. Have fun with Spike and Buffy ya'll.


It's a classic story…

Boy meets girl.

One hundred-twenty plus years vampire meets sixteen year old vampire Slayer.

They start talking.

They attempt to kill each other.

To their mutual delight, they find they have much in common.

To their mutual disdain, they find they share many of the same attributes.

They both like books, Italian, old movies, and long walks on the beach.

They are both highly skilled martial artists, both have a tendency towards violence, and are both blonde.

He leaves her his phone number.

He runs off, but informs her that he's still going to kill her later.

Next time they meet, it's a little awkward, and a little sweet.

Next time they meet, it's confusing, irritating, and horribly unfair.

He's giddy.

He's drunk.

She's bubbly.

She's annoyed.

They part ways reluctantly.

They finally get the heck away from each other.

When they meet again, they're ecstatic.

When he comes back, they're both livid-albeit for different reasons.

He likes her, she likes him, and neither is quite sure how to proceed.

He hates her, she loathes him, and both know exactly how this should go down.

He makes small talk.

He jeers at her love-life.

She smiles at him shyly.

She breaks his hand and steals his life-preserving ring, leaving him to burn in the scorching sun.

They agree to meet at a coffee shop.

They assume they'll meet in a cemetery.

But they bump into each other at the grocery store instead.

But he is captured by a government agency and when he escapes, goes to her for help.

They laugh about running into each other.

She laughs at how pathetic he is.

He buys her coffee at the food court.

She brings him blood in a novelty mug.

They eventually part ways.

He finally leaves her Watcher's house.

They just know they'll meet again-it's Fate.

They just know they'll meet again-it's inevitable in a town this size.

He thinks he loves her.

He knows he loves her.

And she loves him.

But she hates him.

He gets his chance with her when he bumps into her at a party.

He blows his nonexistent chance with her when he chains her up in his crypt.

He takes her out.

He dreams of taking her out.

She flirts.

She teases.

He flirts back and she blushes.

He makes with the innuendo and she punches him in the nose.

Gosh, he loves her.

Joss, she's gorgeous.

Lord, she loves him.

Snaps, he's irritating.

He proposes.

She dies.

She says yes.

Her friends bring her back to life.

They make love.

They make… dust.

Things are good.

Things are hell.

He screws up.

They both screw up.

She forgives him.

It takes her awhile, but she gets there.

They sleep in each other's arms.

He sleeps in her basement.

They hope to have lots of children.

They have an army of slayers.

Her mother dies.

He burns, saving the world.

She cries.

She is a stone.

He holds her.

She won't let anyone touch her.

Weeks later, she's come to terms.

Five months later, she's never been so unhappy in her life.

He adores her.

Joss, she misses him.

She knows she's lucky.

She can't believe she's this unlucky.

She worries that she's getting old.

She knows she won't get old.

He assures her that she's not.

She doesn't care if she doesn't.

He gets a phone call.

She picks up the phone one day.

The world spins off of its axis.

He's rushing for the hospital.

She's on a plane to LA.

She is in the maternity ward already.

He's already in the middle of a battle.

He sighs lovingly.

She gasps in shock.

He tenderly kisses her.

She punches him in the nose.

She cries.

She cries.

He loves her.

He loves her.

She loves him.

She loves him, she loathes him, she can't stand him, and can't stand to be away from him.

And they live happily ever after.

And they don't bother trying.


A/N: Meh. Not what I pictured when I started this. Hope you all enjoyed. Sorry I've not posted anything in this fandom for so long. I still love it!