He can't marry Kyle, he can't do that to me. I ran a hand through my hair. Kyle always put up with my shit, and now it was over. I lost, destroyed everything because I was pissed off.

I unblocked Kyle on Facebook his new status 'OMFG he proposed' it had 380 likes and 2 comments.

Wasn't anybody team Stan? Next was a picture of the ring uploaded and my heart broke because someone else had realised how special Kyle was.

I decided to leave a comment, 'Say No'. He replied in seconds posting a picture of his middle finger on my page.

Kyle Broflovski is offline. I bit my bottom lip it was too late but I still refused to give up on Kyle or on out relationship or on who we are and who we were meant to be.

1. Finding my redhead.

I had once put a GPRS beacon in Kyle's phone.

I need to activate it and find him, Kyle was mine. The empty feeling was there as I wondered if he still felt anything for me. I just felt Kyle will always be there, This time I was loosing him.

I walked to my car and drove home ready to dig through boxes and find the GPRS tracker. I wouldn't be handing over Kyle easily. I miss him, it was hurting just at the thought of never holding him again.

I got home and began my search for the tracker, I found it in an old box filled with pictures of Kyle and I in kindergarten. I pulled out of a picture of Kyle and I in diapers, my hand covered in paste and in Kyle's hair.

I ran a hand through my hair, I loved Kyle dammit! I was going to kill the bastard if Kyle doesn't hear me out.

I pulled out the stupid charger for the tracker and plugged it in.

Kyle

I sighed as I played with my dinner on my plate, "Is something wrong?" he asked. It made me sigh, everything was perfect. Just 'Perfect'! I sighed as I bit at my lip, Jason's eyes narrowed on me. "Another bitch fit?" I frowned but remained silent.

"Monsieur can I get you anything else?" The french chef asked as he peaked his head out of the kitchen.

"No we are good, Kyle shouldn't be eating too much he has put on some weight" Jason commented.

"Oui" The chef gone now and Kyle feeling but depressed.

"I was going to give you this during dinner but hopefully this will clear your bitch fit. Marry me baby ." It was a statement not question, Jason was seated across from Kyle in the dinning room of the fabulous Mansion. A maid dressed in a french maid outfit stepped into the room just as Jason tossed Kyle the ring. Before he got an answer from Kyle they were interrupted.

"Sir, a Mr. Charles is here to see you" she said before walking away after a small bow.

"Baby I'll see you later to plan the wedding, make sure you loosen up your hole for me because I won't be preparing you tonight." Jason said before leaving his half finished meal and leaving.

I took out my new samsung phone and took a pictures, of the ring and of the ring on my finger. I posted to facebook, twitter, myspace- you name it I posted it there but it didn't rid me of the empty feeling.

I sighed as I ran my hand through my hair, I had put on 4kg and Jason like skinny boys so naturally I was put on a diet... I wondered why I was dating him and then I began to wonder how it ended so badly with Stan. Then I felt maybe, just maybe I do belong here. Not just because the guy is filthy rich but because he was there for me and was not afraid of commitment.

Jason was remarkable, not only that he was one of the few men in the world not afraid of the 'M' word, Stan didn't love me. I feared I made the whole thing up in my mind, Stan had always belonged with Wendy and there i was in the middle the only thing that stood in their way and now i was gone, he can finally be with the woman he loved.

The churn of my stomach made me remember how it felt when he held me in his arms. How he kissed, how he said he loved me. Sighing I decided to go upstairs and and prepare myself for Jason to fuck and I took off my clothes and took out a bottle of lube and smiled.

Welcome to my life.

XxxxxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxX

Stan never felt the way he felt today, he had just got off his flight, where it all began between him and Kyle. So he fucked up and this time it was bigger and more destructive but he was sorry, didn't that mean anything.

No matter the bullshit he knew Kyle and him were destined to be together till death due them part. He wondered why Kyle was no longer fighting for them. He knew he messed up but he never knew he would lose Kyle.

There is no way Kyle will not fly in to get his mother's blessing for the marriage. I decided to see my parents and await news of Kyle's arrival before stopping by Kyle's old home. Sheila glared at me as she opened the door when I knocked on their hard oak door.

"Yes?" She stood in a defensive pose, as if ready to attack at any given moment. "What do you want? You broke my baby's heart with the way you treated him and you have the balls to stand in my door way-?"

"I am sorry, I know what I did was unforgivable but I promise you that I will spend the rest of my life making it up to Kyle" I said, she sighed before letting me into their home.

"Kyle feels he should stay with Jake, the boy is all wrong for my baby. Starving him and mentally abusing him, it hurts me to know that the horrible boy treats him so badly." she growled.

"You do not like him because he makes Kyle starve himself and stops Kyle from visiting. You have no other reason, mother." Ike rolled his eyes as he got off the stairs heading for the kitchen. "Besides I am team Jason, least he buys me shit and takes good care of my brother"

"Ike-" I began but he shook his head and walked away. "I just want one chance 'Mom' " I pleaded, Sheila sighed but nodded.

"Kyle will be here by 7 in the morning tomorrow. If you ever upset my baby again I will kill you, lead a fucking riot against the Marsh family. " She smiled at me before leading my shocked form to the door.

2. Talking to my baby.

The night flew past with me contemplating on what to say to Kyle. I licked my lips that felt dry, as I walked from my home down the street to Kyle's with the intention to wait till he arrived.

He arrived hours later in a taxi looking skinner than he did before, pushing for anorexic. I gasped at him feeling angry that he'd let someone tell him to starve himself so badly.

The reunion was heartfelt and touch between him and his family, smiling wholeheartedly, that is till he saw me. I stood there watching him, he looked frozen too before he glared at me. breaking the trance of our starring competition.

"Hey" I whispered, he smiled at me before swallowing hard.

"What are you doing here?" Kyle asked. He crossed his arms over his chest, his mom and Ike took it as a sign to leave the room.

"I screwed up, I am sorry. I didn't know what I had until this Jacob-"

"Jason" he corrected me.

"Jason guy came and became your superhero, I fucked up but I just want you to forgive me this once and I swear that-"

"You cannot do this to me Stan, You cannot come back into my life after you left me for Wendy. The only reason you are here is because you don't want someone else to have me and not because you want me. You love Wendy and you always did, I was her replacement when she left you for Token and you have been settling ever since." Kyle pulled on the hem of his long sleved grey v-neck shirt.

"I know I made mistakes that I can never fix but I will make everyday of my life dedicated to show you how sorry I am. Please Kyle, don't leave me. I need you and what is life without Stan and Kyle, we have been together since kindergarten. Don't end it all for Jack."

"I can't go back to be just your fucking lover, I want more and-" I pulled out a ring and got on one knee. He looked shocked, eyes widening and mouth parting slightly in shock. No one was as perfect for me as Kyle.

"I just- No" he moved away from me as if he were scared, taking steps back till he hit the wall. Heart beating and my heart squeezing up in pain. "You are not good for me" he whispered in a hushed tone.

"Oh and Jeffrey is? At least I never treated you like a fucking object making you starve yourself and suffer. I looked out for you and only you, so why are you choosing him over me? We have been together for years, why would you throw it away?" Anger rising in me, I couldn't believe he was picking Joey over me.

"I can't trust you Stan, the only reason you want to marry me is because another guy showed interest in me. That is the only time you care and for the last time his name is Jason not Jack, Joey or Jeffrey."

"I love you"

"I would like to believe that, I would really like for me to pretend that none of this happened and come running into your arms so we can fight and break up again in another two months but I can't do this anymore and I have come to terms with it" He had tears running down his flushed cheeks. "The thing is I just can't do it anymore, I want to be happy." Kyle said before biting his lip, he looked undecided. "I think you should go" Kyle ran up the stairs I wanted to follow but Ike blocked my path shaking his head.

"Kyle baby, come on you do not mean that. We can work out our problems, we -" I yelled to him not forcing my way past Ike but making sure he could hear me.

"You should leave lover boy." Ike said with a smirk.

3. Convincing my fucking fiance (that doesn't know he's my fiance) to fucking come back to me. (Part1)

Kyle took a deep breath trying hard not to think about Stan and his stupid proposal. Jason had moved the wedding to a month after Stan proposed because he said it would be the only time he'd be remotely free to give a whole day to meaningless frolicking. His words not Kyle's, he wasn't making a mistake was he?

Kyle POV

Maybe neither Jason nor Stan were perfect, perhaps the I was not meant to be with either of them and what if I was meant to die alone like Cartman always told me.

I stood staring across the room at the tux that laid on the bed, beautifully tailored to my exact fit. Swallowing hard it felt like the walls were closing up on me and I couldn't breath. Armani suit, a million dollar wedding to a man that would never have time for me, no doubt that four years from now I will be considering suicide. He wanted me like a trophy wife, swallowing hard I smiled at myself in the mirror and shook my head. I wrong, I would learn to love Jason as much as he loved me.

The soft knock on my door pulled me from my thoughts, Alice stood there smiling at me. Alice was Jason's mother. A blonde MILF with blue eyes and ever perky boobs because she refuse to breast feed and 'not' because of plastic surgery.

"Why aren't you dressed darling? Time is money and I don't need you messing up my baby's special day." She said with a fake smile before inviting herself in and placing herself on my bed next to my suit dressed in a white trouser suit.

"Shouldn't you be calming my nerves?" I frowned as she gave a laugh.

"Honey, you are marrying money." She rolled her eyes, sitting up she crossed her arms over her chest and rose a brow. "What other kind of encouragement do you need?"

"I don't know but I am freaking out. You don't think we are moving too fast? I don't feel ready." I bit on my bottom lip and he shrugged.

" Say I do and get a platinum credit card. How hard can it possibly be?" I glared at her. She stood from the bed and walked to the door before leaving . I turned my back to the door as it shut behind her, when the door opened again I didn't turn to see it was, I assumed it was Alice so when I turned and saw Stan standing there with angry blue eyes.

"Kyle please." I sighed and stared at him, he sank to his knees. "Please don't marry him. I love you more than him, we both understand each other. Don't throw us away" he pleaded. "I'll sell my soul just so you will be mine."

I stared at him and tried to resist the begging, he knew how much I loved people grovelling at my feet. "Stan-"

"I get it I suck, I fucked us up and now here I am wanting you back. I am sorry I messed up and I swear that I will never do it again" He pleaded.

4. Convincing my fucking fiance (that doesn't know he's my fiance) to fucking come back to me. (Part 2)

"I get it I suck, I fucked us up and now here I am wanting you back. I am sorry I messed up and I swear that I will never do it again" I pleaded.

He looked unsure and nervous, I wasn't sure if I could watch someone marry the love of my life. Be happy with him and probably cuddle up to him at night, did that make me selfish? I wondered but I wasn't bothered by that now, what mattered was getting Kyle back into my arms.

I stood up and moved closer to him, I kissed him, he kissed me back wrapping his arms around my neck. He moaned loudly as I let my hands fondle his ass. Massaging my fingers into those amazing muscles.

Before I knew it we were on the bed and we were naked, he was riding me looking down at me with an emotion I could not identify. When were done he remained silent as he watched me dress up.

"So your calling off the wedding?" I asked. He shook his head and it made my heart get stuck in my throat.

"Why Wendy? I need the truth, not what I want to hear. I want the truth now." Kyle asked and I watched tears fill his eyes, he sat up on the bed and cried.

"I swear- I just felt it would teach you a lesson and you would appreciate me more." I felt shame and guilt hit me like the iceburg to titanic.

"I have to go" he finally said as he began to get dressed, I felt my heart break. I let him go by his time, getting dressed after and leaving the room to watch the love of my life marry Jonah.

I watched him standing there a smile plastered on his face as Jessy spoke on the phone instead of moving along the wedding shit. No one seemed shocked about how Joe had paused the wedding for a call. Didn't he have respect Kyle? I don't know what prompted me to stomp over there and punch him in the face.

He fell back with his phone, I heard Kyle scream behind me. "I get that Kyle doesn't want me but you will not disrespect him by holding up the wedding because of a phone call." Everyone was in shock, Joe stared up at me before he was calling for security.

Kyle stared at me with large green eyes, "Come with me" I said with an outstretched hand he smiled.

5. Choosing me.

I was shocked when his hand entwined his fingers with mine, seriously. We were running together down the aisle, Jefferson seemed to finally get what was happening. He was calling out to Kyle but Kyle had already chosen me and I was not letting him change his mind.

I paused and lifted him in my arms, his arms wrapped around my neck. Did I just steal the bride? Wow. He buried his head in my neck which made me happy. I felt complete again.

Fuck Jason.

Security on our tail as I raced down the stairs but I didn't care. First order of business was to get him to eat, he looks like a fucking skeleton.

Next was to propose to him and keep him as mine forever and strict security so no fucker can steal my bride. He is all I have and all I want, I love him.