Update: January 19th, 2013

Huge thanks to my Beta-Godess, Irritable_Grizzzly, and my fabulous pre-reader, Vican.

Disclaimer: Nothing's my fault. Ever. In life and fic.


The curve of her neck. The perfect weight of her breasts in my hands. The silky taste of her, infusing and arousing me. This is where she belonged. Naked and beneath me, trailing hands up my back. Hooking fingers into my shoulders as I wound her to her breaking point.

I loved dreaming. They were all amazing, but those about Isabella were especially vivid, and even though I knew it was a fantasy, it felt real. She felt real. Soft under my hands. Warm and breathless.

I missed her so much.

I touched her everywhere, and the relief I felt was boundless. The wrongness of being apart melted away, replaced by intense, muscle-trembling desire.

"Edward ..."

She panted and moaned. Every inch of skin was a wonder to me. Every shudder and small noise. Bringing her pleasure made my whole body come alive, and even my dreams, she never looked more beautiful than when she was naked in my arms. I reveled in her body. In mine. Greedy and indefatigable, I watched her lose herself time and again in the sensations we brought out in each other.

She touched me gently. Stroked me with feather-light touches until I couldn't stand it any more. We had to be joined. I pushed in, and oh ... yes, this. For as long as we lived, I needed this. Her. Always.

I thrust slowly, savoring how different it felt now. So powerful. So much pleasure, I couldn't comprehend it all. Each deep slide wound me tighter, almost too much to bear. But my ever-present pain was catching up. Chasing and grasping with clawed hands. Twisting in my abdomen. Piercing my scrotum.

I could feel myself groaning, but I couldn't wake up.

The warm comfort of the dream faded, and panic set in. I was no longer controlling my actions. Every movement was a compulsion. Bloody-minded in its singular purpose.

Dream-me thrust faster, and the pain eclipsed the pleasure. Obliterated it in sharp breath-stealing bursts. I was burning from the inside out. Agony lanced through me with every frantic movement and yet, I couldn't stop. I was going to come, and I braced myself, because it felt like my orgasm was going to tear muscles from bones.

Stop it. Stop moving. Stop thrusting. Just, stop!

But, I couldn't. In fact, I sped up. Used more force. Gasped and grunted like a man possessed.

Dream-Isabella stroked my back and urged me on. Whispered how much she loved me. How good I made her feel. How incredible I felt inside her. She gripped me as my groan became a roar, and orgasmed around me as the roar became a scream. And wWhen I finally climaxed, my scream wasn't even human any more. It was the sound of pure, savage torment, tearing out of my throat as waves of agony shredded my insides.

Then cool hands were on me, and I lurched into a sitting position, gasping for air, sweaty and breathless. My throat hurt. My dick hurt. My balls felt like they were filled with liquid fire.


Carlisle. I tried to say his name, but it came out as a hoarse whisper.

He grabbed my hand. Pressed fingers against my pulse. "What happened? You were screaming. Are you all right?"

He froze for a second and sniffed the air, then dropped my hand and stepped back. "Oh, I see."

That's when I felt it. Warmth spreading from my crotch and down my thighs. Thick and viscous.

"Oh, God."

"Now, son ..." Carlisle said as he glanced at the wet patch that was spreading on the sheet covering me. "This is perfectly natural for a young man of your age. It's nothing to be ashamed of."

I pulled back the sheet. My boxers were covered in semen. It was everywhere. Seeping out of my underwear. Pooling beneath me.

"Oh," Carlisle said, at a loss for words. "That's ... uh ... well, what you have there is an unusually large amount of ejaculate."

"What the hell?" I said, horrified.

He grabbed a box of tissues and passed them to me. "I'm sure there's no reason to panic. This isn't quite normal for a human man, but then again, you're not entirely human. Plus, you haven't ejaculated anything but venom for nearly a century. Your new body must feel you have some catching up to do."

I wiped myself with handfuls of tissues and was on my fourth wad before I'd even cleared half of it. Carlisle disappeared and returned a few seconds later with a trash bag. By the time I'd wiped most of it away, the box of tissues was empty, and the bag was full.

"Fascinating," Carlisle said while he tied the bag. "Perhaps the pain you've been feeling was related to the pressure of all that ... ah ..."

"I believe the word you're looking for is 'jizz.'"

"Well, yes. I'm assuming your screams indicated it was painful to climax?"

I glared.

"Yes, of course it was," he said quickly.

"If that's what it's going to be like every time, I'm never getting laid again."

"Well, perhaps now that you've ... exploded, your next experience will be more pleasurable."

"I hope so. I also hope there'll be less ..."

"Jizz?" That word was so incongruous with his nature, it made me smile.

"Exactly. This is ridiculous."

He nodded. "It is rather excessive."

I got out of bed and headed into the bathroom. Walking was a revolting experience. It felt like my boxers had been soaked in glue. All my parts were sticking to other parts. It was incredibly unpleasant.


"Hmmm?" I turned on the faucet and tried to get the excess stickiness off my hands. Even with soap, it wasn't easy.

"I think this may have been the breakthrough we've been waiting for."

I turned to him. "Carlisle, I've just had the world's messiest and most excruciating wet dream that will no doubt leave me scrubbing semen off myself for days. What makes you believe this was a breakthrough?"

He smiled. "Because you just got out of bed and walked to the bathroom without a single indication of pain."

I took a moment to process that. I flexed my arms. Lifted my legs.

He was right. There were still twinges when I contracted my muscles, but the deep-seated ache that had lived in me since the change, was gone.

"How do you feel?"

I flexed again, amazed. "I feel good. Sticky, but ... great. If I'd known it would take the orgasm-from-hell to get rid of the pain, I would have done it days ago."

"Well, as much as I believe in the healing power of pleasure, I don't think you can put it down to just a wet dream. The massive anti-inflammatory injection and vitamin booster I gave you probably also helped."


"Still, I'm happy for you, son. This is a major step forward."

I was so relieved, I almost hugged him. Then I realized how completely gross and inappropriate that would be and settled for giving him a smile. He smiled back.

"Well, better get cleaned up," I said, trying to ignore what was running down my leg.

"Of course."

I went to close the door, but in a flash he stopped me and thrust a specimen jar in my face.

"Wait, before you shower ..."

I sighed and took the jar. "You want a sample."

"Yes, please. I'd like to test your fertility."

"Please tell me this is the last bodily function you have to test."

He nodded. "Yes. Absolutely."

He was the worst liar in the history of lies.

"Carlisle ..."

"Okay, fine. If you happened to vomit, I wouldn't complain."

I shut the door in his face.




Sit-ups. Push-ups. Bench presses. Advanced inverted yoga poses.

I could do it all. Effortlessly. There was still some pain, but it was like my body had rebooted.

I felt fantastic. Unstoppable.

Horny as hell.

I was counting down the time until Bella got home in minutes. And hand jobs. Carlisle had been right. After that first excruciating orgasm, I'd only felt pleasure. Now that the dam had broken, so to speak, I couldn't stop touching myself. It helped relieve the constant state of arousal in which I found myself while anticipating Bella's return. If I wasn't enjoying it so much, I'd say it was getting to be a problem.

"Are we done yet?" I asked as I sprinted on the treadmill while Carlisle monitored me. "I need to shower." I was barely out of breath. Being a vamp/human/wolf hybrid wasn't so bad after all.

"Edward, you've already showered four times this morning."

"What can I say? I'm sweaty."

"And apparently, a serial masturbator."

"Carlisle ..."

"Nothing to be ashamed of, son. We all do it."

If I didn't think it would look ridiculous, I would have put my hands over my ears. "Jesus ..."

"When our life-mates aren't around, a little self-love is sometimes the only thing that keeps us sane. Remember that time Alice went to Russia for a week with Carmen and Eleazar? Jasper was like an animal. He masturbated so often I thought I'd have to perform an extremely awkward re-attachment."

"Please stop talking."

"Even after all my years with your mother, if she calls me at work during the day, I have to fake a toilet break to relieve my -"

"For the love of God, Carlisle, shut up!"

He chuckled. He knew how uncomfortable conversations about him and Esme being intimate made me. I didn't understand why he found my mortification so hilarious.

He turned up the treadmill to its highest speed. I felt like I was jogging. He recorded my vitals and punched them into the laptop.

"Your fitness is remarkable. Your heart rate has hardly increased, and you've been working out for over two hours, non-stop. Interesting. I'll have to devise more rigorous activities to test your limits."

"Something to look forward to."

"So, Bella gets home tonight?"

"Yes. She's on her way back as we speak."

"Did she have a nice time?"

"I don't care. I just need to see her."

He smiled. "You may need to temper your desperation. Alice tells me you've been having regular fantasies about tearing off Bella's clothes as soon as you see her. For all of our sakes, please don't."

Having him say that made me fantasize about her. Upstairs, Alice yelled, "Edward ...!"

"It's not my fault," I said and threw up my hands. "Carlisle brought her up. I was just running and minding my own business."

In a second, Alice appeared beside me. "You were not. You're been fantasizing about her constantly since your little dreamgasm yesterday. And you've been touching yourself way too much. No one needs that many showers."

"I thought you couldn't read me because of the wolf blood."

"Unfortunately, my visions of you are becoming clearer. And more frequent. Now that the pain's gone, and there's nothing standing in the way of you and Bella being intimate, you're driving us all crazy with lust. Especially Jasper."

"And you're complaining?"

She thought about it for a second. "Well ... uh ... no."

"Then why are you bothering me instead of jumping your horny husband?"

She frowned. "Good point." There was a rush of air as she disappeared, then noises I really didn't need to hear from my siblings.

"Carlisle, are we done?"

I could tell he was trying to block out the noises, too.


He hit the stop button on the treadmill, and it ground to a halt. I pulled the electrodes off my torso and grabbed a towel.

"So, son, I take it you want to have sex with Bella when she gets back, correct?"

I felt like saying 'duh', but I realized how uncouth that was. Then I realized I was biologically seventeen and said it anyway.

"Well then, we should probably talk about protection. I won't have definitive results regarding your fertility for a couple of days, and you've never used a condom, have you?"

I really hated discussing this stuff with him. I'd rather talk with pretty much anyone else about it. Even Jacob.

Maybe that was going a bit far, but still.


"No, I've never used a condom. Never had the need, being all dead."

"That's what I thought." He reached under the bench and brought out a large banana and a foil square. "Welcome to Condom Application 101."

I rubbed my eyes. "Carlisle, I have two medical degrees. I'm certain I can figure out how to use a condom."

"Are you sure? It's trickier than it looks. I wouldn't want you to embarrass yourself in front of Bella."

"I'll be fine."

"The demonstration won't take long."

"Carlisle ..."

There were crashing sounds from upstairs, followed by Jasper yelling an instruction to my sister I wished I hadn't heard.

"Okay," Carlisle said and cleared his throat. "As long as you're sure."

"I am. I'm going for a run." I strode past him then stopped, took two steps back, grabbed the banana out of his hand, and headed out.

By the time I'd reached the top of the stairs, I'd peeled the banana and eaten half of it. By the time I'd reached the back door, the rest of it was gone. Food was awesome. I was almost as insatiable for it as I was for Isabella. Considering I couldn't have her right now, food would have to be a poor substitute. I took off running and discarded the peel several hundred yards away from the house.

After a few seconds, I couldn't hear Jasper and Alice any more. Thank God.

Running felt good. I no longer had vampire speed, but I was still fast. Very fast. It was freeing. My feet pounded the ground as I ducked and weaved through the trees. Everything smelled amazing. Different than before. My vampire senses used to be so acute everything assaulted me at once, and I had to compartmentalize and sort through the myriad of scents to find those which were useful. Now, everything was clear but less intense. Pine needles, dirt, wildflowers, moss. It all smelled new and interesting.

I was still able to pick up animal scents, and without really choosing to, I followed them. Even though I no longer had the need for animal blood, I still had the urge to hunt. I wondered if it was just force of habit or a primal instinct derived from the wolf blood. Perhaps a bit of both.

Without the constraints of debilitating pain, my new body exceeded my expectations. I knew I'd be stronger and faster than a human, but as I pushed myself, I realized both Carlisle and I may have underestimated hybrid physiology.

I followed a herd of deer north, not as stealthy as I used to be but still able to keep up with them. I slowed when they drank from a nearby stream. As I took in a deep breath, their scent made all my muscles coil. My predator instincts flared, and I stalked forward, silent and focused. My heart pounded with the thrill of the hunt, and adrenaline coursed through me. The elk directly in front of me spooked, but just as she prepared to leap away, I pounced.

I slammed into her and wrapped my arms around her thick chest, easily bringing her to the ground. She thrashed and bleated, but I held firm. My mouth was next to her neck, and it was strange to not have the urge to tear into her hide and swallow down mouthfuls of warm blood. Today, I was satisfied with the thrill of the chase and my obvious victory.

I said, "Thanks for the game, ma'am," before releasing her and watching her bound away into the forest.

I sprang off the ground, invigorated and dizzy with power. "I've still got it," I said to myself as I brushed leaves and mud off my shorts and headed back toward the house. "Oh, yeah. I've still got it."




I bounded up the stairs two at a time and rushed into my bedroom. Emmett and Jasper had helped me move my bed back upstairs this morning, and now I had just over an hour to shower and get ready for Bella's return. I was so excited, I couldn't wipe the smile off my face.

I stepped into the shower and washed myself thoroughly. To be honest, I spent way too much time cleaning my penis, but it felt too good to stop. I hadn't told Bella I was in full working order yet, and I hoped it would be a pleasant surprise.

Hi, sweetheart. Welcome home. Let me introduce you to my fully healed and extremely aroused body. It's missed you so much.

That mental image had me attending to my greedy erection all over again. It needed her, almost as much as I did. I couldn't wait to see what our new bodies felt like when joined. The mere thought of it had me leaning against the tiles and groaning through my climax. My hybrid orgasms were astounding. So much sensation no longer marred by the distracting images of violence and death that used to assail me.

After washing my hair, I got out and shaved. My scruff was almost a beard, and it took three razors to achieve a smooth finish. My trembling hands did nothing to help my technique, but at least accelerated healing meant I didn't have to endure the indignity of walking around with tiny bits of tissue stuck to my face.

I dressed in fresh jeans and a t-shirt and spent too long trying to convince my hair to look like I'd made an effort. Bella wouldn't care. I was pretty sure that whatever I wore would be torn from my body a few minutes after she walked in the door. I'd prepped my family to say their 'hellos' quickly then let us have the house for the night. If I had my way, in just over forty-five minutes, I'd be making loud, passionate love to my life-mate, and I really didn't want my family to witness it.

By the time I got downstairs, there was only half an hour to go.

I walked into the kitchen to find Esme cooking up a storm.

"You know it's just the two of us, right?" I said as I surveyed the mountain of food.

"I know, but if Bella's appetite is anything like yours, you're going to need all this and more."

"Esme, we may not even make it to dinner."

She stopped and glared. "Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, if you let all of this food go to waste, I'm going to kill you. Then reanimate you and kill you again. Bella's been traveling all day. She'll be hungry and exhausted. Let the poor girl eat."

No matter how exhausted Bella may be, I knew the first thing she'd want to do was get her hands on me. Still, I supposed that after we took the edge off our lust, we could eat something. Then each other.

I wandered into the living room. Alice, Jasper, Rose and Emmett were sitting around watching the cooking channel. I think they were coveting all the food they were going to eat after they were changed.

"Where's Jessica?"

"With Jacob," Emmett said without taking his eyes off the screen. "Man, look what she's doing to that meat. It looks freaking delicious." He nudged Rose. "Babe, when we've turned, could you cook that for me? Naked?"

I rolled my eyes and went outside.

Twenty minutes to go.

I paced on the porch for a while, but when I heard Alice giggling hysterically, I headed back inside.

"What?" She looked at me and laughed again. "Alice, what is it?"

She stifled her mirth long enough to say, "They've just gotten back into town. Bella will be here in about ten minutes."

My stomach flipped, and my heart took off like a racehorse. She'd need to take a quick detour past her house to drop off Charlie, but then she'll be here. Thank God.

Alice giggled again. It made me nervous. Her displaying this much glee could only mean one thing - I was about to get screwed, and not in a good way.

"Alice ..."

"You'll see when she gets here."


"No, Edward, you'll just have to wait." She waggled her finger at me, and I wanted to break it off. My sister should know better than to taunt me when I hadn't seen my mate for five days. Pretty sure my hybrid body was capable of taking her down within a few seconds.

"One day, Alice ... pow, right in the kisser."

She snorted, and I stalked outside to wait. I hated waiting.

After the longest seven minutes of my life, I heard a car in the distance. My car. I'd persuaded Bella to take my Lexus. It was the least ostentatious of my vehicles, and the only one she'd agree to drive. There was no way I was letting her take her death-trap truck on a road trip of any kind, let alone to Canada. She would have frozen to death before she'd reached the border.

As the car got closer, my excitement levels went through the roof. Adrenaline flooded my body. Increased the oxygen consumption of my muscles. Made me jittery and hungry for action. Any action. Preferably an obscene amount of sex.

An image of making love to Bella flickered in my brain. I'd never wanted anything more in my life than to race to that car, rip off the door, carry her upstairs, and pleasure her for untold hours. I was rock hard just thinking about it.

"Edward, gross," Alice muttered as my family filed out of the front door and loitered on the porch. I stood on the bottom step and tried to resist running down the driveway to meet her.

When the car appeared through the trees, I stopped breathing. There was stifled laughter from behind me, which I ignored.

It was only when the car got closer that I realized what they were laughing about.


No, no, no, no.

Through the windshield, I could see Bella's unhappy expression.

Oh, sweetheart, how did this happen?

In the car next to her was her father.

All my plans for a marathon sexual reunion vanished in the blink of an eye.

My poor, desperate erection almost screamed in frustration.




Oh, damn, Charlie, what the ...? You are SUCH a mean cockblocker. You. Not me. Absolutely not me.

If you have time to let me know your thoughts, that would be even nicer than a light but firm spanking.

Thank you so much for reading.

Kiya x