Hello reader! I'm so happy you have decided to read this Peeta and Katniss fanfic! Before beginning, there are a few things you should know; I know this story has MANY grammatical errors, and I know it is not perfect. Don't worry though! It isn't supposed to be. I wrote this in such a way that conveys Katniss's order of thought. So it's ok that there are run-ons or fragments, and probably even some switching back and forth between past and present tense. However feel free to correct me in a review if there is a mistake that you find to be very distracting. This is a pretty straight forward oneshot, but I must say the it does contain kissing and sexual content, so do not read if you find a problem with this. (If you do I completely understand, this was a new territory of writing for me as well.) Enjoy!
disclaimer: I do not own any of the Hunger Games story lines or characters.
My life never fails to bewilder me. I still have yet to completely figure out why I am still alive. I shouldn't be, in my opinion, considering how many living hells I've fallen into. I can think of one single string that helps me connect to the world now, and that thin yet sturdy string is Peeta. Yes, the boy with the bread, my dandelion in the spring, the only soul that can stop my hysteric screams during the night, my healer.
He is getting better. It's just on occasion that I see darkness coat his angel eyes, and slowly spread throughout his body making him stiff and vacant inside. He handles these episodes well though. He takes time to grip something, and breath as slowly as he can. He often turns away from me when this happens, afraid he'll strike out. He hasn't done that yet though. Like I said he is getting better.
We live together now. In my house in Victor's Village. At first the transition was awkward, after all the damage that has been forced between us. But, I know I wouldn't find it nearly as easy go to sleep each night or wake up each morning if it weren't for his constant company. We have a nice lifestyle now, I guess, with all things considered. We sleep in the same bed at night, just like in the past that now seems so long ago. We take turns shaking one another awake from nightmares. Well, the term "nightmares" doesn't exactly describe theses horrendous dreams. However, I can't seem to think of another way to describe them. Think of everything bad thing that has ever happened to you and put all of those events together, and maybe multiply them by ten. That would be a watered down description of what Peeta and I experience each damn night. So anyway, after we both wake in the early morning, (it varies who wakes up first) we start to go about somewhat separate lives. I take to the woods, and Peeta paints and bakes. We travel to town a lot. After all, District 12 has begun to patch itself up quite nicely. Then around noon we meet back home for a meal together. Often times we sit quietly, just enjoying the presence of the other person. We make it a daily occurrence to visit Haymitch who honestly is doing okay, for him. This is how we live, or least how we did live, until a few nights ago.
It had been a year. A year of Peeta living with me. A year of growing closer and closer to the last living person that I love. It was comforting really, knowing we were "in love." Not a normal love of course, but a damn strong love that's for sure. I know Peeta still loves me because he makes it priority to tell me everyday. He looks me dead in the eye, and when he does, I believe him. We also talk nearly nonstop to each other. About everything. We cry and laugh both for ourselves and for each other, it brings me much satisfaction. We no longer find it difficult to touch. In fact, there is a force that now tends to draw us together, not only with embracement, but with our lips too. Each time they meet it's so pleasurable that I feel something uncontainable building up inside of me. It always reminds me of when we were on the beach. I always want more, more of him. It took me awhile to figure out what my body was telling me I wanted. It took me even longer to tell Peeta this. However, it was only when I told him, that I found out he not only knew about my longing all along, but that he wanted it too, maybe even more than me.
It all began one night when we were kissing. We were in the bed, and I had been awakened by a dream. I can't remember what occurred in it because it was a dream of rear occasion, a calm dream in which nothing catastrophic happened. It was only enough to cause my eyelids to flutter and open slightly. Enough to give me the urge to look over at Peeta, who was sleeping soundly. He was facing my back, with his strong arm resting over my side. I contemplated for awhile on whether or not I should awake him. My urges eventually overcame me, and I gently touched his sweet face. His eyes opened slightly, and he blinked for them to adjust to see my face. I calm grin spread on his face, and he copied my caress to his face. He spoke quietly with a steady voice.
"Hey, are you alright?" I nodded my head and smiled slightly in response. Peeta soon realized what I needed, he had a way with reading my mind. His smile widened a bit as he scooted closer up against me. I turned so that I was facing him completely. He wrapped both muscular arms around me in an embrace that was significantly comforting. I used my hands to cup his face and gently swipe his blond hair from his forehead and back further onto his head. We wasted no more space between us, and as our lips connected I felt that instant pleasure. I could tell the same wave of pleasure had come over Peeta as well, because he relaxed every muscle and let out a small moan in doing so. I let myself do the same. Our tongues began to entangle. His mouth was so sweet, just like the rest of him. His hands went from being wrapped around my waist to being tucked under my head and neck in order to help deepen the kiss. I thought for a moment about what to do next. On nights like this, we usually slowed down and stopped after about this point. Except this time, I didn't want to stop. I wanted to keep going and going forever. I wanted to somehow show Peeta that I loved him too much to stop now. I wanted him, all of him. I was suddenly nervous at this realization. But my need for him quickly forced me to ignore this feeling. I decided to go ahead and give him the ok. I quickly broke our kiss. At first Peeta seemed confused at my retreat.
"Peeta…" I said, and looked straight into his eyes, hoping he would understand; he did. He gently rolled me onto my back, and positioned himself over me. He took a moment to move a piece of hair out of my eyes. He seemed to be in deep thought. Then he spoke.
"Are you sure?" His words were simple, but they held much meaning behind them. It occurred to me all at once that we were both virgins. It almost seemed strange that we still held some form of innocence after everything we had been through. I took the opportunity to ask myself one final time if I really wanted this. I looked Peeta up and down, I smiled slightly. He was beautiful. I loved him, and he is the thing I treasure most on this earth, so it would mean the world to me to share yet another part of myself with him.
"Yes, I am." I say this with absolute positively in my voice, and Peeta smiles in a happy manner. We began acting on impulse, for neither of us really knew for a fact what we were doing, we just knew what general direction we were heading in. We started by resuming our kiss with a new found excitement. I felt as if I might lose all control, but Peeta kept us steady just as he always does. In a flowing motion, we stripped each other of our clothes. I felt another set of nerves shoot through my body as I realized we were both down to our under garments. I slowly removed Peeta's boxers from his body. He wasn't reluctant to let me do so. He was beautiful, flawless, even with his prosthetic leg, which I had obviously grown used to, and even a bit found of. However, I felt a bit self-conscious. Not that I was worried about breast size or anything, I had never been very flat, but I had suddenly remembered my uneven patches of skin left behind from all of my burns and skin graphing. As Peeta removed my underwear, I realized all that was left between us was my bra. He removed me of it in three swift motions. I glanced up at him. I wondered what he was thinking about my body right now. I must have looked genuinely worried because Peeta cupped his hands lightly around my face and locked his gaze on my eyes.
"You, are, so, beautiful Katniss." He said those words with so much truth in his voice that tears began welling in his eyes. It wasn't long before mine became blurry as well. At that moment, we each realized that the damage our bodies had endured, had made them all the more admirable for their strength. It was quite an emotional moment for us both. We took a second to embrace and shed a few tears for ourselves. As we broke apart, we shared a smile and began to get back to the matter at hand. With a new respect for each other, we connected our lips once again. We started to let our hands wonder, gently touching each other all over. I no longer felt any form of self-consciousness, and was filled with pleasure as soon as Peeta's warm, soft hands found their way to my breasts. He carefully massaged them. I closed my eyes, taking in the sweet feeling. After a minute or two, he moved one of his hands down to my opening and slipped in a finger. He used the same massaging motion as before with my breast. I couldn't help but let out a long moan. This was such a wonderful feeling. I felt the need to repay him for this pleasure. I realized Peeta was a natural at this so far. I wondered how I could ever give him the same amount of satisfaction I was getting. I moved my hand from the back of his neck down to his penis. I began carefully stroking. I received instant response. Peeta let out a loud moan that sounded very satisfied. He looked at me as if to say "yes, that feels nice, thank you." All at once we unanimously decided to stop teasing each other. Peeta looked at me with an expression that said to listen close, and take seriously what he was about to say. He spoke firmly, and steadily.
"If at any time you want me to slow down, stop, or if you feel too much pain, you tell me immediately, alright?" I nodded.
"I will, I promise." I meant it too. I knew this was going to hurt. But I also knew that after the pain, extreme pleasure would come. I decided to be as strong as I could.
Peeta placed an arm on both sides around my head as if to protect me, and I must admit, it did make me feel comfortable. I arched my back a little to make an easier angle for Peeta. I hoped I was doing this right. I closed my eyes as he, very slowly and gently, began to enter my vagina. As I allowed him further entrance, the pain started to sharpen. He was being as careful as possible, but I couldn't help but let out a short cry. My hands tightened around his back, and I could feel him questioning me about whether or not I wanted him to stop. I steadied my voice and responded the best I could.
"No Peeta, it's ok, I'm ok, please keep going, just nice and slow ok?" In repose, he kissed my cheek, and began going even slower than before. He whispered into my ear a few calming "sssshhhhh" sounds. I took a deep breath and loosened my grip on his back. The pain began to alleviate itself. Soon, a whole new rush of pleasure overcame me, starting in my vagina and working its way up through every nerve ending in my body. I arched my back even more, trying to signal for Peeta to move upward, and go faster. He took the hint very well, and picked up his pace inside of me. He pressed deeper into me and I moaned in pleasure. He also let out a low moan that told me he was feeling the same satisfaction. I opened my eyes to see the pure enjoyment on his face. I suddenly became overjoyed that I could give this feeling to him. I wanted nothing more than to see his satisfaction. He all the sudden found a spot inside of me that sent spasms everywhere. I felt really wet. But I felt good. Peeta was not far behind. He let go inside of me and let out a tired but content sigh. We were both sweating slightly. He slowly laid down beside me and I turned to look at him. He brushed a hair from my line of vision and I smiled widely. I returned his gesture by tucking his short blond locks behind his ear. We really had no need to speak, we could read each other just by looking into the other's eyes. I can tell you right now that we were both feeling the same emotion. An emotion that neither of us had truly felt since the day of the reaping at the 74th Hunger Games, and that emotion was happiness.
Peeta and I spent the remainder of the night nestled close together, putting in an extra effort to hold on tightly to each other. We had a new connection now, the boy with the bread and I, and it just happened to be a connection that I know on one will ever take away from us. That's real. And it's better than life itself.
Thank you for reading! I hope you found this story to be of interest! Also please review and tell me all of your thoughts, good or bad. Oh and one more thing! Let me know if you want me to turn this into a multi-chapter! Also, any more ideas for future Hunger Games fics are welcomed! Thank you and have a great day readers! :)