Warning: gay sex, details of rape, talk of child abuse, strong language.

Chapter one

Even though everyone was tired, the minister for magic needed answers and those had to come from Harry Potter and his friends. So after having something to eat and some hot chocolate, Harry, Hermione, Ron and Kingsley followed Minerva McGonagall to her new office.

With the help from Albus Dumbledore's portrait and the memory that belonged to Severus Snape, Harry, Hermione and Ron explained everything. They explained what happened when they were away, how they had been taken captive and exactly what happened at Malfoy Manor. Harry explained about everything that took place in the forbidden forest. Harry also gave his own opinion on a few things but he knew it really wasn't up to him to decide these things, that would be up to the new minister. Harry just hoped they got decent and caring people to run their world now and not idiots or anyone dark, but also people that didn't only think about themselves, but thought of everyone. The three friends didn't leave out one bit of information because they knew an official statement would have to be released and Harry at least knew that Kingsley would be honest, plus he would leave out the parts that Harry asked him too.

Harry sat wearily on one of the chairs to see if there were any more questions but all he saw was sadness on Minerva McGonagall's face and concern on Kingsley Shacklebolt's face. Even his friends looked concerned.

'If there isn't anything else, I'm really knackered. I thought I'd go find somewhere to sleep.'

'If you give me a few minutes Mr. Potter, I get a room ready for you. Why don't you wait here until I come back to get you. Mr. Weasley, what about you and Miss Granger?'

'Dad said we're heading back to Muriel's for a few days. I told him we needed to explain, so he's waiting in the great hall for us.'

'Alright, then why don't you head out, you look exhausted?'

Hermione and Ron stood up, 'Harry, see you in a couple of days.'

'When you're at the Burrow, let me know. But after I get some rest I'm going to find my own place so make sure you let your parents know I won't be staying there.'

'I always knew you'd do that and you like time alone. We'll see you soon mate.'

After his friends and professor left, Harry stood and stretched which made him wince at all the aching muscles.

'That took more courage than anyone could possibly have,' Kingsley said softly.

'Not really Kingsley, I just wanted it finished. I don't think I could have kept going like that, always wondering when he would strike next, always having to stay in hiding, always knowing I could die at any time. I really don't care about dying, it was the waiting for it and I didn't want all of you to die.'

'Why wouldn't you care about yourself?'

'It's like I had a death sentence hanging over my head from the moment I was born. But think of it this way as well, my life has been anything but good, not as a kid and not over the last seven years. I really just wanted it all to end, one way or another, I just figured it would have been me to die in the end.'

'We all had faith in you Harry, Albus said you could do it we just had to trust you. I know it pissed me off that you wouldn't tell us what you were doing. As order of the phoenix members, we all worked together, but Albus didn't want you to explain anything. I understand now of course, it was a good decision by Albus to keep all that to the least number of people possible.'

'Yeah,' Harry sighed, then lifted his glasses and rubbed his eyes, 'I know none of you were happy about this, but it was too dangerous. Merlin Kingsley, what if I didn't watch that damn memory? You know I never intended to, I hated him and wanted nothing to do with him, not even his memories.'

'Then why did you?'

'I came here to get some advice from him,' Harry jerked his head towards the portrait of Albus Dumbledore, 'He wasn't here, none of the portraits had anyone in them. I was desperate, so I figured what could it hurt. But I also wondered why he would give me anything. He'd still be here otherwise, we'd still be fighting, dying and nothing would have stopped it,' Harry rubbed his eyes again then rubbed his neck, 'I'm so sick of all this, of him, of this world, of magic, of everything. Maybe it might be best for me to just leave.'

'No Harry, it wouldn't help with the way you're feeling, nothing will except some time. You've just gone from a dangerous, tense, stressed and hectic life to nothing, all in a space of a few seconds. You need to de-stress and you need rest then you'll be able to cope with everything, especially the bit of knowledge that is causing you some distress, which is understandable.'

'Maybe,' Harry moved around the circular office and stood staring down into the pensieve, 'I've seen things that will live with me forever, I really don't know how to deal with anything.'

'You will my young friend, if you give yourself some time to rest and heal. I'm not just talking about healing those wounds you've got, I'm talking about healing your heart and soul, people that have suffered from traumatic events for years need time when those events stop. You, being the one he was always after will need that time, a lot of time to deal with all this. You have people that care about you that can help, but what you need more than your friends, is time. Let me offer a suggestion.'

Harry turned, 'Okay.'

'Stay here for a while, help Minerva. One thing I do know about you Harry, you like to help if you can. Minerva is going to need a lot of help, so aiding her will help you.'

'I always loved Hogwarts and I can't believe how damaged it is. I didn't want this fight brought here, he found out I was here,' Harry looked around the office, 'I think I like your idea Kingsley. But what about you and the ministry, won't you need help, I could always help you.'

'I'm getting everyone I know that is honest and not any way a supporter of him to help. But if you would like to assist, I'll take it. You can't get better than the saviour.'

'Please tell me that's not really the name they've given me?'

'Sorry,' Kingsley grinned, 'Harry Potter, the saviour of the wizarding world. They know just like all of us that you didn't do anything alone, but they, like all of us know it was you that finally killed him and saved our world from having him rule over us. So even though I do know you hate the attention and hate being thought of as different, you are and the faster you accept that, the sooner you can deal with it.'

Harry sighed, 'Fine, so I'm some blasted hero to everyone, not something I wanted and I never did it for that, I did it because I had no choice. I learned long ago that my life, my decisions were never my choice, nothing much has changed has it, well, apart from the danger.'

'Mr. Potter,' Minerva stepped into her office, 'I have some quarters for you.'

'Thanks Professor,' Harry turned back to Kingsley, 'I hate asking for help, but if you get some time, can you talk to the goblins for me. I hate dealing with them and since I did destroy half the building and broke in and out, they won't be very happy with me at the moment. But I really need to get some money out of vaults.'

'I'll work it out in a few days and since you are staying here for a while, you won't need money straight away. But like all of us Harry, most haven't been near our vaults in almost a year, ever since he had control over everything. So go sleep, rest, then you'll start feeling better.'

'Let's hope I do mate,' Harry sighed, then followed Minerva down to the third floor where she showed him some quarters, 'Thanks Professor, but you look like you could use some sleep as well.'

'I am going to as soon as I finish speaking with Kingsley,' she nodded then walked off.

Harry sighed again then stepped into the room, then saw the other door, so he made his way into the bedroom, dropped his bag, stripped his clothes off, put his glasses and wand on the cupboard beside the bed and climbed under the covering, snuggled down, closed his eyes and fell into a deep and peaceful sleep.