I was in a very Remus/Sirius kind of mood today. And this was the result. :) Enjoy!
I don't own HP, sadly.
When you get down to the bottom, please leave me a review! Thanks!
The young werewolf turned around at the sound of his name. He smiled when he saw Sirius Black walking over towards him.
"Look what I got, Remus!" the five-year-old exclaimed. He held up his toy broomstick.
"A broom!" Remus said, his smile widening as he charged over to his friend. "I wanna ride it!"
Sirius thrust the broomstick into Remus' hands. "Here you go. Now you get on it and lean back, just a little, and then zoom forward!"
Remus did as his friend said and mounted the broom and leaned backwards. The broomstick rose no more than a foot up in the air. "Whoa!" Remus said, smiling down at Sirius. "Here I go!"
He pressed forward a little too hard and the broom moved forward much faster than he was expecting. The startled Remus leaned back just as suddenly. The broom jerked to a stop and Remus fell off over the front end with a pained "oomph".
"Remus!" Sirius shouted, running towards his friend. "Remus, are you okay?" He leaned down and helped his friend up.
"I'm okay," Remus said softly, still shaken by his sudden fall. "Thanks for helping me up."
"You're welcome," his friend said seriously. "I'll always be here for you, Remus."
Remus smiled. "Yeah, me too!" he said. He bent and picked up the toy broomstick again. "I'm gonna try again!"
Remus glanced to his left to see Sirius rushing over to him, hoisting a piece of paper in his hand.
"Remus, I got my letter!"
He glanced down at his own letter with a small smile. His black-haired friend collapsed to the ground beside him, shoving his own letter in Remus' face. Remus read the first few lines and grinned. "You got in, too," he said.
"Course I did!" Sirius said. "I told you we'd both do it!"
"I'm a little nervous to be going, Sirius," Remus said, the smile on his face disappearing. "What if werewolves aren't allowed to go to that school?"
"They wouldn't have given you a letter if you weren't allowed to go," Sirius reassured his friend. "It'll be okay, I promise."
"What if the other kids make fun of me though?"
"They don't need to know," Sirius answered.
"What if I can't make any friends because of it?"
"They won't know what they're missing out on, then. Besides, you have me! I'll always be here for you, Remus."
Remus smiled again. "Thanks, Sirius."
Sirius wrapped an arm around his friend's shoulders. "You're welcome," he said, squeezing Remus. "Now come on, my neighbor's still asleep! It's kind of late, don't you think?"
"Wake up call!" Remus said, jumping up.
"Last one there is a rotten egg!"
Remus was standing with the other first years, looking awestruck as he glanced around the Great Hall. He nervously played with his fingers in front of him.
"Remus, relax," Sirius said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "It'll be okay. The Sorting Hat will put you where you belong."
"What if it says I don't belong anywhere, though?"
Sirius laughed. "That's never happened before."
"But what if it happens to me?"
"It won't," Sirius assured him. "You'll end up in Gryffindor. That's where you belong, after all."
"What about you?" Remus asked, facing his friend.
Sirius took his hand off of Remus' shoulder and stared down at the ground. "I'll probably be put into Slytherin. That's where my entire family has been. They've all been Slytherins." He looked up at Remus and grinned. "But that's okay. Even if I'm stuck in Slytherin and you're in Gryffindor, we'll still be friends."
Remus smiled in relief. "Good. I'd hate to have to hate you."
"Don't worry about it. I'll always be here for you."
Sirius paled and marched up to the front of the Hall, putting the hat on his head. He looked over at Remus. Remus smiled encouragingly.
Thirteen-year-old Sirius strode up to Remus with a sly grin on his face. Remus groaned. "What did you do this time, Sirius?"
"Nothing yet, I promise. But James and I had an idea."
Remus frowned. "What kind of an idea?"
"An idea to help you."
"Help me? How?"
Sirius sat himself beside Remus on the couch in the Common Room. "We are going to help you ever full moon."
"You can't help me," Remus said with a sad sigh.
"We can make it easier for you, though."
"How on earth can you do that?"
Sirius leaned forward, glancing around and acting conspiratorially. "Remember that lesson we had in Transfiguration yesterday?" When Remus nodded, he grinned. "We are going to become unregistered animagi."
"Animagi?" Remus yelped a little too loudly. Sirius leaned closer and urgently put his finger against Remus' lips.
"Shush! Keep it down! We don't want the whole tower to know!"
Remus shook his head in apology. "Right. So how do you two plan to do this?"
"We don't know yet. But we'll figure it out. I promise."
Remus smiled. He knew they meant well, even if they didn't succeed or it didn't work. "Thanks, Siruis."
"I'll always be here for you, Remus."
Remus nodded. "Sure. I think that you're gonna end up being a dog."
Sirius frowned. "A dog? Really?"
"You're loyal and full of energy like every puppy I've ever seen."
Sirius snorted. "I won't be a dog. I'll be something cool. Like a tiger."
"What, Sirius? You don't have to shout; I'm right here."
It was the middle of their fourth year and they were lying side by side underneath a tree by the Great Lake.
"Right, sorry," Sirius muttered. "I just wanted to ask if I'd told you yet!"
"Told me what?"
"About my surprise for you."
"No, I don't believe so."
Sirius laughed gleefully and leapt up. He reached down and offered a hand to Remus. Remus reluctantly took it and allowed his overzealous fried to hoist him up. Without letting go of his hand, Sirius began running in the direction of the Whomping Willow, dragging Remus behind him.
They pressed the special knob with a small branch lying nearby and ducked into the passage towards the shack that Remus hid in every full moon.
Only when they got there did Sirius release Remus' hand. When he did, he took a few steps away from the confused werewolf and faced him. "It took us a whole year," Sirius said with a frown. "But we finally figured it out."
"Figured what out?" Remus asked.
He watched with shock as Sirius began to transform. The transformation took a few minutes because he was new to it, but when it had finished, Remus stared down at the big, black, shaggy dog in front of him.
"I told you so," he said with a smirk, reaching down to rub Sirius behind his ears.
Sirius made a grumbling noise to show his annoyance and Remus laughed. Sirius began to turn back again. "You can just shut up," he teased once he was standing on two legs once more.
Remus smiled. "Thank you, Sirius. You have no idea how much this means to me."
"James managed to change, too. We'll show you his form later. Peter's having a little bit more trouble, but he'll get there."
"Truly, thank you," Remus said, stepping forward to hug Siruis.
"I'll always be here for you, Remus," Sirius reminded his friend.
"We should come up with nicknames for each other."
"And talk in code," Sirius agreed as they started back towards the Whomping Willow. "That way we can talk about all of our pranks at the table in the Great Hall and nobody will have any idea what we're talking about. We could get away with anything."
Remus laughed. "Let's start with nicknames," he said.
"We could call you Moony. You know, 'cause of the moon and your secret."
Remus nudged his friend. "That sounds too much like loony. I'm not loony. Moony won't work. How about Wolfman?"
Sirius laughed. "No way. That sounds way too macho to be your nickname. That would be like calling me Tailwagger or Padfoot or Bigears. Those ones aren't nearly manly enough for me."
"Padfoot," Remus repeated. "I like it."
Sirius jumped over the back of the couch, landing neatly beside Remus. They were by themselves in the Common Room. There was a book open in Remus' lap. "I'm studying, Padfoot," Remus mumbled.
"Our OWLs. What else?"
"Oh, right, I forgot about those," Sirius said. "Oops."
"What are you bugging me about, Sirius?"
"Am I not allowed to come and talk to my best friend?"
"Go find James," Remus told him. "I'm busy."
Sirius leaned over and stole the book Remus was reading from his lap. "You can't be busy if you don't have anything to do," Sirius taunted.
"Give it here, Padfoot," Remus complained.
Sirius leapt up from the couch and started across the Common Room. "No way," he said, grinning. "You'll have to come and get it."
Remus jumped up and chased after Sirius. Sirius ran around the room a few times, Remus right on his tail, before tripping over the corner of a rug and falling flat on his back. Remus, who was too close to stop himself, tripped over Sirius' feet and landed on top of his friend.
"Ouch!" Sirius groaned. "Remus, that hurt!"
"Sorry, sorry," Remus said, putting his hands on either side of Sirius to hoist himself up. It was then that he realized just how close to Sirius he was.
Both boys froze. Remus swore he saw Sirius blush. Sirius fidgeted a little beneath him. "Er, Moony?"
"Right, right, sorry, sorry," Remus repeated, standing up. He offered Sirius a hand and pulled his friend up. He pulled a little too hard, though, and they again ended up a little closer to each other than they had intended.
There was no denying the color tinting Sirius' face. He paused a moment before taking a step back. An awkward silence fell over the room as the boys settled stiffly on the couch again.
It was a few minutes before either one said anything. "Well, I don't think it's ever been this… awkward between the two of us," Sirius said, forcing a laugh and rubbing the back of his head with a hand.
"Nope," Remus agreed, "never."
"Well that doesn't matter." Remus looked up and met Sirius even gaze. "No matter what happens between us, I'll always be here for you."
Remus smiled. "Good, you'd better be," he said, chuckling.
Sirius handed his book back to him. "Sorry," he muttered.
Remus shook his head and put the book back in his book bag. "It's okay. I've been studying for too long today, anyway."
Silence fell once more.
Sirius stood from the couch and grabbed Remus' hand, pulling him up as well. "Come on, I saw some Ravenclaws out by the lake who have been studying far too long, too."
"And I have some extra dungbombs that are just begging to be used."
"What are you waiting for?" Sirius asked, grinning. "Go get them!"
Sirius was running around the grounds, desperately trying to find Remus. After nearly an hour of looking, he finally found him behind one of the greenhouses.
"Go away," Remus muttered. His knees were pulled up to his chest and he had wrapped his arms around them, burying his face. "I don't want to talk to you."
"Remus, listen to me, I'm sorry!"
"It's my fault. You made it my fault."
"That's why it isn't your fault," Sirius said softly. "It's mine. I was the one who told Snape about the shack. It was all me. You couldn't have helped it."
Remus looked up. His face was tearstained and his eyes were watery. "Damnit, Sirius! I could have changed him! Or worse, I could have killed him! Killed him! Do you understand how serious this is?"
Sirius looked down at his feet, obviously ashamed. "I'm so sorry, Remus. I know nothing I could do will ever make this up to you."
"No, it won't," Remus agreed, lowering his head again. "You're a right git, Sirius."
"A complete bastard. A total idiot."
"I know," Sirius repeated. "I'm all that and worse."
"Yes, you are."
Sirius sighed and sat down next to Remus. "I didn't think it through," he whispered, not trusting his voice. "I thought it would be funny."
"Well it wasn't fucking funny, was it?" Remus snarled at him.
Sirius shook his head. "Not in the slightest."
"You are so lucky James was there. We're both lucky James was there."
Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus and pulled his friend against his side. Remus sighed and leaned his head against Sirius' shoulder. "You're still a git, you know," Remus muttered.
"I'm sorry," Sirius repeated.
"I get that," Remus said. "You can stop apologizing to me now." They were quiet for a moment until Remus got an idea. "You know how you can make it up to me?"
"Go apologize to Snape."
Sirius tensed but nodded his head. "Alright."
"Good," Remus said.
"It wasn't your fault."
"It was both our faults."
"You can't control what you do when you're changed."
"That isn't an excuse."
"It wasn't your fault," Sirius repeated.
Remus just hummed in response.
"You know I'll always be here for you, right?"
"Even when you are being a right foul git," Remus said.
"Thanks for forgiving me."
"Who the hell ever said you were forgiven?"
"You're hugging me aren't you?"
"No, you're hugging me. And it's freezing out here and you're warm so I'm not complaining."
Sirius was quiet for a moment. "So I'm not forgiven?"
Remus let out a humorless laugh. "Not by a long shot," he said.
Sirius watched as his friend howled in pain.
"Fuck, you didn't take your potion, did you? Remus, you stupid, stupid wizard!"
He changed into a dog as Remus was completing his own transformation. They hadn't reached the shack yet. It was Winter break and James and Peter had gone home, so Sirius had opted to stay at school with Remus. The moon was full this night, and snow covered the ground and a harsh wind blew through the trees. Even with a thick coat of fur, Sirius shivered.
Remus turned his big, yellow eyes on Sirius and growled. Sirius nipped at Remus' legs and darted towards the Forbidden Forest, leading his friend away from the castle. Remus howled and followed eagerly, snapping at Sirius' rear every few paces, occasionally snatching a patch of fur from his tail.
Sirius yelped and halted when he knew he'd gone far enough.
Sirius spent the next few hours keeping Remus in check, using all of his energy and then some to keep the werewolf's attention on him and to keep his friend within his sight. He snapped at his heels and leapt at his head and torso in feign attacks, not wanting to harm, only to distract.
Remus, however, wasn't concerned with the well being of the obnoxious black mutt. He snapped at Sirius with at each attack and clawed at him when he was trying to get away. He'd occasionally get a snap at Sirius, once or twice even getting a good grip on the dog's back or belly.
Sirius knew he'd be bruised and battered in the morning, but in the moment, he didn't much care. He had to protect Remus and make sure nothing happened to him and that he didn't do anything to anyone else.
By the time the moon had begun to go down, Sirius could barely stand. He watched with relief as Remus began to change back and did so himself as well. With hardly enough strength to keep himself on his own legs, he lifted an unconscious Remus and carried him the two miles back to the Shrieking Shack.
He knew that if he didn't, Remus would wake up and realize they hadn't made it to the shack and he wouldn't be himself for at least a month. Last time they hadn't made it, Remus didn't speak for three weeks. Sirius couldn't let that happen to him again.
When he reached the shack, he set Remus down as gently as he could. Without much more thought, he collapsed on the floor beside his unconscious friend and fell asleep.
When he woke up again, it took him a moment to realize where he was. His side was rather warm, and he glanced down to find Remus curled up against him. His arm was across Sirius' chest and his face was buried in his neck. Sirius' own arms were wrapped around his friend, holding him closer.
After a moment of consideration, Sirius realized he didn't mind this position at all. In fact, it was rather comfortable.
Remus stirred awake. He yawned. "Bloody hell," he mumbled, squeezing Sirius as he stretched his legs. "Last night must have been one hell of a night. I hurt in places I never knew I could."
He opened his eyes and, realizing who he was clinging to and what he'd just said, laughed at the absurdity of the situation. Sirius couldn't help but laugh to. "It wasn't that kind of a night," he said.
"I'd hope not," Remus muttered, nuzzling against Sirius. "I don't remember a thing."
"Good," Sirius said, stroking Remus' shoulder with a finger.
Remus shifted again, accidentally hitting Sirius in the side. Sirius moaned in pain.
Remus sat up, suddenly alert. He looked down at his friend. Sirius looked like he'd been through hell and back.
"Oh, shit, Sirius. You look terrible." Remus looked guiltily down at his friend. "I'm so sorry. Last night must have been horrible for you."
"It could have been worse," Sirius said, pushing himself up with a grimace. Remus looked skeptical. "Really," he assured the werewolf.
"Thank you, Sirius."
"You're welcome." He caught Remus' hand in his and put his other hand under the blonde's chin, forcing him to face him. "I'll always be here for you, Remus."
Remus paused, looking curiously at Sirius. Before either fully realized what was happening, they were both leaning in. Remus was the one to close the gap, pressing his lips against Sirius'.
It was in that moment that Remus realized that his suspicions were all correct. He was falling for his best friend. He smiled inwardly when he felt Sirius start to kiss him back. It was a gentle touch of their lips; more tender and loving than anything else.
Sirius pulled away with a goofy grin. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."
"I think I might have an idea, actually," Remus said before claiming Sirius' lips again.
When Remus placed a hand against Sirius' face, causing him to yelp and pull back because of a particularly nasty cut there, they decided their time was better spent getting to the hospital wing to get Sirius patched up again. They trudged back to the castle, hand in hand, not much caring about the odd looks they were getting from their fellow students. What they thought didn't matter, anyway.
Sirius found him in a compartment on the train, sitting by himself. Sirius leaned down to give him a light kiss before settling down beside him. Remus instinctively turned into him, leaning against him. Sirius wrapped an arm around his shoulders.
"Seventh years," Sirius breathed.
Remus chuckled. "I never thought we'd actually make it."
"We all knew you'd make it, Moony," Sirius said with a laugh. "It was James, Peter, and I that we were all more concerned about."
"Speaking of them, have you seen James or Peter?"
Sirius shook his head. "Lily was looking for James, too. I have no clue where he got off to."
"Probably messing with some poor first year."
"Prongs is good at that."
Remus only nodded in agreement. "What happens after graduation?"
"We find jobs and continue our lives," Sirius said automatically.
"No, that's not what I meant. I meant with James and Peter and Lily. And you and I. What will happen to you and I after graduation?"
Sirius thought for a moment. "Well," he said, "You'll find a job. Probably in the Ministry. Or maybe as a professor here. I know how much you love Defense. I'll find a job. Maybe as an Auror. Or maybe I'll work at Zonko's. We'll find a flat to buy and move in with each other. And who know what will happen after that?"
"We'll stay together, though," Remus said.
Sirius smiled. "Of course we will, love," he said, kissing the top of Remus' head. "I'll always be here for you."
Remus hummed and looked up at Sirius. Sirius bent his head and pressed a kiss to Remus' lips.
It was then that they found James. He burst into the compartment and exclaimed rather loudly, "Oi! Lovebirds! Go get your own compartment! None of us need to see any of that!"
Sirius glared at James. "You're such a hypocrite. You and Lily are way worse than Remus and I."
"Besides," Remus pointed out, "this was our compartment until you burst in."
James grinned at them and sat down across from them. "It's good to see you two!"
"Good to see you, too, James," Remus said, smiling as Lily and Peter found them as well.
"Sirius, get your arse into the locker room! James will kill you if you are late to your last game! It's for the Cup, you wouldn't want to miss this!"
Sirius grinned and pulled Remus against him. "I just wanted to tell you something."
Sirius put his lips to Remus' ear. "I love you," he whispered.
Remus sighed happily. Those three words had remained unspoken between them. Until just then.
"I love you, too, Sirius," he said. He shoved his boyfriend away from him. "Now get to the Quidditch pitch and beat the hell outta those Slytherins!"
Sirius strode forward once more and grabbed Remus' hands, looking at him rather seriously. "I really mean it. I love you. And I will always be here for you."
Remus grinned. "I know," he said.
Sirius was grinning and waving at his boyfriend from across the crowd. Remus spotted him immediately and ran towards him, throwing his arms around Sirius' neck. "We're done!" he said excitedly.
"We did it! I can't believe I graduated!"
"I had faith in you," Remus said, kissing Sirius.
Sirius hummed in approval and pulled Remus even closer.
They broke apart when they hear Lily squeal. They turned and saw James down on one knee. Sirius grinned, wrapping his arm around Remus' waist as they approached the newly engaged couple.
"Congratulations, mate," Sirius said, clapping James on the back.
"She said yes!"
"Of course she did!"
"I've been pining after her since our first year!" he said, grinning. "She agreed to marry me!"
Peter, who had just found them, whooped. "I told you so, James."
"We all told him so," Remus agreed.
Lily grabbed James' tie and pulled him towards her. "If you don't mind, boys, I'm going to steal my fiancé for a little while." James eyes widened and he eagerly followed her out of the Great Hall. Sirius and Peter wolf whistled as they disappeared.
"So we should stay clear of the Room of Requirement for a while," Peter said with a chuckle. He looked up when his name was called, waved at Sirius and Remus, and disappeared into the crowds again.
"I guess that's it, then. The end of the Marauder's school days."
Sirius nodded and smiled at Remus. "It's the start of a whole new adventure. And Remus, you know that I'm always going to be here for you."
Remus kissed him again. "Good. I'll always need you here."
"The dorm room is empty," Sirius said, waggling his eyebrows at Remus.
Remus grinned. He pulled Sirius closer by the lapels of his suit jacket. "Why didn't you say so sooner?" he asked.
Sirius took no time in grabbing Remus' hands and pulling him away from the crowds.
Remus shook his head and looked up from the applications he had been filling out. "You're nice shirt is hanging up in the closet, on the right, and your slacks should be right next to it. Your suit jacket is on the bed and I picked out a tie for you already."
Sirius walked into the office, clutching the tie in his hand and grinning like a loon. "You know, Moony, as I recall, you really liked this tie."
Remus glanced up at him. The tie was the one Sirius had worn at graduation. Remus winked. "That's why I chose it."
Sirius laughed and leaned down to kiss Remus on the forehead. "How are the applications going?"
"Alright, I guess." Remus shrugged. "What if I can't get a job? You know, because of the –"
"You'll find something, I'm sure," Sirius interrupted him.
"You have too much faith in the rest of the population."
"If you can't find something in the wizarding world, then to hell with them. We can run away to the Muggle world together."
Remus grinned. "You'd do that for me?"
"I'll always be here for you, love. You're the thing that keeps me going every day. Of course I'd be willing to do that for you."
Remus pulled Sirius down and kissed him. Sirius responded in kind, wrapping a hand around the back of Remus' neck. A few moments later, he pulled back with a sigh. "I really should get going," Sirius said. "My interview is in an hour, and I'm not even dressed yet."
Sirius straightened and started out of the office.
"You'll do just fine, love," Remus called after him. "I know it."
Remus rolled his eyes when he heard Sirius' whine.
"Why can't I?"
"Because it's James' wedding. We aren't in school anymore; this is a very serious day for him." Sirius pouted and Remus laughed, patting Sirius' cheek. "You'll survive, love."
"I don't know that I will," Sirius moaned, laying back on their bed and putting a hand to his forehead. "I feel faint and I think I'm running a fever. I can't feel my limbs, either. I think it's killing me!"
Remus laughed and rolled over so that he was on top of his lover. He kissed Sirius firmly. "It is not. What if it was your wedding? Would you appreciate it if dungbombs went off while you were saying your vows?"
Sirius thought for a moment and frowned. "I suppose not," he mumbled in defeat. "I'd hate it if he did something like that in the middle of our wedding."
"Exactly." Remus paused and thought for a moment about what Sirius had implied. "Our wedding?" he asked.
Sirius looked up at him innocently. "Of course."
Remus narrowed his eyes in thought. "Do you think that might happen one day?"
"I don't see why not," Sirius said. He put his hands on Remus' sides and rolled them over so that he was on top. "In fact, how does June sound?"
"J-June?" Remus stuttered.
Sirius nodded, placing his lips on Remus' neck. "Yeah, late June. I know that's your favorite time of year. In fact, how about late June, next year?"
"That's in eight months," Remus managed as Sirius continued kissing and suckling his neck.
"Yeah, I suppose it is."
"What are you implying?"
Sirius lifted his head again and looked at Remus. "I'm implying that you should say yes."
"Yes to what?"
Remus' eyes widened. He gaped at Sirius for a moment, and upon realizing that Sirius was in fact being serious, grinned and nodded vigorously. He wrapped his arms around Sirius and pulled him down.
"Yes," he mumbled between kisses. "A thousand times, yes. I love you."
"I'll always be here for you, Remus. I promise you, I'll always be by your side."
Remus hummed. "Thank you," he said honestly. "Now shut up and kiss me, for Merlin's sake.
Sirius grinned and complied. They didn't get out of bed until much later the next afternoon.
"Get away from me!"
Sirius watched Remus as he put as much space between them as he could manage in their small apartment. He frowned.
"Remus, you have to listen to me! I'm innocent!"
"Thirteen people, Sirius! Including Peter! And Lily and James are dead, too! How could you do this to us? You were their Secret Keeper! You were supposed to keep them safe! You betrayed us all!"
"Remus, if you'd just hear me out –"
"No," Remus shouted. "I will not listen to anything you have to say! You are a sick, twisted bastard! You stay the hell away from me! You murderer!"
Sirius winced. "It wasn't me," he mumbled, sounding defeated. "It was Peter, he –"
"Peter's dead! His finger was all that was left! You killed him, Sirius!"
"NO!" Sirius roared. "I didn't kill him! Shut up and LISTEN TO ME!" Remus looked startled but remained quiet. "Peter was made their Secret Keeper at the last minute! He was the one who betrayed us! He killed those twelve Muggles and then got away by cutting off his finger and transforming into a rat!"
"You liar! How dare you lie to me! How dare you show your face here! Get out! Get out or I swear to Merlin I will turn you in!"
"Remus!" Sirius pleaded. "I'm not lying! I'm telling the truth!"
Remus' whole body was shaking with anger as he raised his hand and pointed to the door. "Get out. I never want to see you again. Never. Get out. Just leave, Sirius. Please. Leave."
"I love you," Sirius said sadly. "I love you, so much, Remus. And I'll always be here for you."
Those words were the breaking point for Remus. "You bastard. I can't love you. You aren't Sirius. You aren't my Sirius and I hate you. Now get the hell out and don't come back!"
Sirius nodded, willing himself not to cry. Hate. The man he loved had just told him he hated him. He left without another word.
Once Sirius was gone, Remus ran to the fireplace, tossing some floo powder into the flame. "Ministry of Magic," he said, just leaning his head into the now green fire. "Yes, Minister, I just wanted to let you know that Sirius Black has just left my apartment. If you leave now, you'll catch him out front."
He stood back up again, watching as the fire burned orange once more. He slumped into his chair, mulling everything over in his head.
Remus Lupin cried.
For twelve years, Remus lived alone in the flat he and Sirius had chosen together. For twelve years, he never once heard the voice of his childhood friend, his school days crush, his lover say his name. He never heard him say "I love you", never felt soft lips on his own, never heard the whispers of sweet nothings in his ear as they made love late into the night.
He hated to admit it, but he missed it all. He couldn't bring himself not to; no matter how many times he thought of the lost lives because of Sirius, he couldn't stop missing him.
For twelve years, he felt alone.
It wasn't until he went back to Hogwarts to teach that he began to have hope again. Maybe, just maybe, Sirius wasn't lying. Maybe he was telling the truth. Maybe Sirius was innocent. And maybe, just maybe, Remus could have him back again.
Remus' body trilled at the sound of the gruff voice. He turned around, and all of his suspicions were confirmed. He held out his hand and pulled Sirius off of the ground of the Shrieking Shack, pulling the man into a hug.
He felt at home again, with his arms around Sirius and feeling Sirius return the embrace. He sighed happily.
"I've told you before," he heard Sirius whisper for his ears and his ears lone to hear. "I'll always be here for you."
"Sirius," Remus said happily. "It's so good to see you."
"And you, my friend."
He turned and faced Sirius, grinning and finding himself once more in Sirius' welcome embrace. They hadn't had a moment to themselves before; not thanks to the full moon and the Dementors. Now, though, as they met each other just outside of Hogsmeade, they had all the time in the world.
"I'm so sorry, Sirius."
"It's okay, love," Sirius murmured.
"It's not okay. I didn't believe you. How can you forgive me for that?"
"I wouldn't have believed me, either, honestly," he said with a soft chuckle.
"Sirius?" Remus asked, looking up at him.
"Please, kiss me."
"With pleasure," Sirius said, leaning in and claiming Remus' lips in the first time in twelve years. Remus hummed his approval, twisting his fingers into Sirius' hair.
"Do one more thing for me," Remus said as they split apart.
"Come back to the apartment, and for the love of Merlin, take a shower."
Sirius burst out with laughter. "That sounds marvelous, love. As long as you take one with me."
"Clean yourself up first and then I might consider it," Remus answered with a grin.
"I'll always be here for you."
"I know, love, I know."
"And I still love you."
"As I still love you."
Remus rolled his eyes. "There's a fresh change of clothes on the bed, Sirius."
"How do you always know what I'm going to ask?"
"You're rather predictable sometimes," Remus answered.
Sirius walked into the front room where Remus was currently pacing. He had left the towel and the change of clothes in the bedroom, opting to come into the room completely naked instead. He came up behind Remus and wrapped his arms around him.
"I've missed you," Remus said, leaning back.
"Not a day went by when I didn't think of you. You were the reason I got through those twelve miserable years." Sirius began kissing the back of his neck. "Come to bed with me."
Remus sighed and turned in Sirius' arms, wrapping his own around his lover's neck. "I love you," Remus repeated for the umpteenth time that day.
"I love you, too," Sirius answered, leading Remus upstairs again.
Remus honestly couldn't remember ever feeling happier.
"I want to go out!"
"You know we can't let you do that." Remus heard Sirius sigh from the couch at the other side of the room. They were at the Grimmauld Place, as per the request made by Dumbledore and the rest of the Order. They had to keep Sirius safe and hidden for the time being, and this was the best place to do it at.
Sirius was sprawled across the couch. Remus was seated in a chair across from him, reading a book. Sirius sighed again. "Remus!"
"What?" Remus said again. He couldn't help but laugh, finding something about the situation very funny. What, though, he wasn't sure.
"Why are you laughing?"
"You, I think."
Sirius frowned. "Why?"
"I've just missed this, I think. We used to do this a lot back at the apartment. Remember? I'd find a good book to read, and we'd light a fire, and you'd find a paper or something to occupy yourself with."
"As I recall, that always ended up moving towards the bedroom."
"Only because you'd get so bored that you would take to distracting me."
"Would that work right now?"
"I'm hardly twenty anymore, Sirius."
"I didn't ask how old you were," Sirius answered with a snort. "I asked if distracting you would work."
Remus thought for a moment. "Not today," he decided, closing the book.
"Why not?" Sirius asked, sitting up.
"Because I think my dog needs to take a walk."
"If I weren't a dog, I think I'd be offended by that statement."
"Do you need a leash?"
"Shut up, Moony," Sirius said with a grin.
A few minutes later, Remus left Grimmauld Place with a big, black dog by his side.
They walked to a nearby park, where Remus sat beneath a tree, opening his book again. Sirius took to greeting people and meeting other dogs and running around and causing as much racket as he could. When he tired of it an hour later, he came and lay with Remus under the tree. He made a gruff, barking sound at the back of his throat, looking up at Remus.
"You're welcome," Remus said quietly.
Sirius looked at him with insistent eyes.
Remus smiled. "I know, I know, you'll always be here for me," Remus said with a laugh.
Sirius barked his approval, moving closer to Remus and laying his head down. Remus absently reached down and began stroking him gently. They eventually fell asleep under the tree and didn't return to Grimmauld Place until dinner time.
That was the last time Remus was ever allowed to be in Grimmauld Place with Sirius by himself.
They were getting ready to leave for the Ministry of Magic, having been informed that Harry and his friends were heading that way, quite possible into a trap.
Sirius pulled Remus into a hug. "I just wanted to tell you that I love you."
"I love you, too, Sirius."
"No matter what happens tonight, just know that I always have and I always will."
Remus nodded. "We'll be fine, Sirius."
If only he had known how wrong he'd be.
He watched with horror as Sirius was hit with Bellatrix's spell and fell into the arch. He watched as Harry started after him and leapt forward in time to grab the distraught teen. He himself couldn't believe it, either. He just stared at the arch, holding onto Harry as hard as he could.
It was later, as they were lowering an empty casket into the ground that Remus truly realized that Sirius was gone for good.
"You promised," he said, standing before the grave now that everyone had left, tears rolling down his face as he spoke. "You told me, all the time that you would always be here for me. Always. That was the promise since we were kids. Where are you now? You aren't here when I need you the most. I miss you, Sirius. I love you. I always will. I just wish you would have been able to keep your promise."
Remus looked up. That had sounded exactly like the voice of someone he had not long ago lost. But that was impossible.
Except the man rushing towards him in the middle of Diagon Alley that morning not only sounded like Sirius but looked like him as well.
Remus froze as he was swept up into a pair of all-too-familiar arms.
"Remus," the voice repeated.
"Impossible," was Remus' response. He remained unmoving in this strangers embrace.
"It's not impossible, though." The man let go of Remus. "Remus, it's me. It's Siruis."
Remus stared, unbelieving, into the familiar eyes of Sirius. "No, it can't be. You died. I saw you fall into the arch."
Sirius, looking more serious and solemn than he ever had before, held out his hand, in which lay a stone. "The resurrection stone. I'd forgotten about it. Dumbledore told me to keep it safe until Harry needed it. I had put it into the pocket of the jacket I had grabbed before we left for the ministry."
"Impossible," Remus repeated.
"Not impossible," Sirius insisted. "I saw James, Remus. He was the one who sent me back. I was in the Shrieking Shack and James came through the door and told me I didn't belong there. He said to go back. He told me I needed to go back for you. And here I am."
"James?" Remus laughed. "James Potter and his wife died fourteen years ago. And Sirius Black died two weeks ago."
"I didn't die, Remus! That's what I'm trying to tell you!"
"You fell through the archway!"
"And somehow, I managed to find my way out! I have no idea how it happened, Remus, but here I am! I'm here, Remus, and that's all that matters!"
Remus looked at him cautiously. "Sirius?" he asked.
"Yes, Remus, yes, it's me!"
Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius and clung to him, burying his face in Sirius' shoulder. "It's you. It's really you."
"It's really me," he answered. "I had to keep my promise."
"I'll always be here for you, Remus."
"This last two weeks has been the worst of my life," Remus mumbled.
"I'm sorry. Never again, love, never again."
Sirius grinned at Remus and tossed his wand to him. "Sirius," Remus said, striding forward and hugging Sirius. "Be safe. Fight well. Come back to me."
"Same to you, my love. We'll get through this. I just know we will. We have to. We still haven't gotten married yet."
Remus couldn't help but laugh. "We are about ready to fight Death Eaters and You-Know-Who. People are going to die tonight, people we know, and you think about our marital status?"
"The lack there of, actually," Sirius corrected.
"You're a nut."
"You love me."
They stood there for a moment longer, reveling in a moment of peace before they walked into hell on earth. They heard shouts from somewhere nearby.
"It's time," Sirius said. He sighed. "I love you."
"And I love you," Remus answered.
"You need to stay alive. We both do. That way we can have our happily ever after."
Remus smiled weakly. He claimed Sirius' lips one last time. It was a brief but passionate kiss, filled with years of friendship and fights and forgiveness and love. "I'll see you when this is all said and done," Remus said.
"You can count on it."
Remus let go of Sirius and ran off towards the Astronomy Tower, not looking back. He knew that if he did, he'd go back.
Sirius watched him go before charging off to help at the front gate, thoughts of living a long life with the love of his life running through his head.
March 2nd, 1960 – March 2nd, 1998
October 15th, 1959 – Marck 2nd, 1998
Aww. :( That made me sad just writing it.
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Thanks for reading!