The Post-Apocalyptic Family Captain

A Series of Drabbles

Dark Lady Devinity

An: Companion to Of Cotton Candy and Ballet. Don't necessarily have to read it though. All you need to know is that Snippy is totally the mom of the group. And there was cotton candy.

The first drabble is 100% the fault of Worstcase. This is what happens when I read my reviews people! More stories.


Pilot panicked and gripped Snippy's hand tightly. Snippy sighed and adjusted their hands so that their fingers were intertwined. It relieved some of the pressure.

"Do you have to scare him?" Snippy snapped.

Engie looked up from where he stood, bent over Pilot's mouth. Pilot's mask was in the aviator's lap and Engie was trying to pry open his mouth. Pilot hadn't been complaining about any pain but he had stopped eating and was constantly rubbing at his jaw. Finally Engie and Snippy had concluded that this meant that Pilot had a toothache. Probably from too much cotton candy.

"You're taking this mom thing pretty seriously." Engie said, finally giving up on getting Pilot's tightly clenched teeth apart.

"He won't be of any use to any of us if he starves." Snippy pointed out irritably. While he didn't like that he had been dubbed 'army matron' it did mean that Pilot was a little less hostile. Pilot now saw Snippy as the kind of cute, comfortable shoe a mother would wear instead of a generic, useless kind of shoe. And, yeah, a scared-of-the-dentist-like-a-little-kid Pilot tugged at Snippy's heartstrings.

"Well, then, you get him to open his mouth." Engie suggested.

Snippy sighed. "Pilot, if you don't let us make sure that your teeth are healthy then they're all going to fall out and you'll die." Pilot just sat there frowning. "I'll tell Captain on you?" Pilot whimpered but didn't do anything else. "No more bedtime stories!" That also didn't help. "Aaah, no more goodnight kisses before I tuck you in at night?"

"He gets goodnight kisses!?" Engie yelled.

"What, you want one too?" Snippy snapped.

"N- bu- KISSES?!" Engie cried, his hands flailing in every direction.

"It was Captain's idea. And I don't give Pilot good night kisses. I give them to... well, it doesn't matter." Snippy mumbled.

"The kisses are for Mr. Kittyhawk!" Pilot said. "He can't sleep without them."

There was a pause as Engie stood there in shock and Snippy died a little on the inside due to embarrassment. Then both men dived on Pilot and the aviator suddenly found himself with Engie's fingers in his mouth while Snippy held his hand with his right hand and used the elbow of his left arm to keep Pilot's mouth wedged open.


A few bitten fingers and one bitten elbow later, Pilot was happily eating his dinner while Snippy and Engie looked after their various injuries. Luckily, Pilot had no cavities as far as they could tell. He did, however, have a small piece of metal digging painfully in his gums until Engie removed it.

This now means that Snippy has to check everyone's dinner in case other stray substances made their way into the cans during production (unless he finds a hidden stash of tetanus shots).

An: Send me any ideas/requests for momma!Snippy (or general family-like) stories and I'll see what I can do. My new momma!Snippy headcanon makes me a little too happy.