Disclaimer : I don't own anything.
AN: this is just a short silly Steroline friendship/romance story I wrote after seeing the last episode to relieve the stress from my exams. At first, after seeing 4x09 I wanted to write a OS about them having wild sex on that couch on top of thrown chess pieces. Turns out that once my character got talking they just wanted to be cute. Hope you'll like it either way. PS: I'm writing another version, with more wild sex and violence.
The chess set flies, and there is nothing left but pain.
He is reminded of Klaus' words, of this loneliness that comes after taking a life. He could feel the Ripper inside him responding to the Original's words, begging to be set free. It's even stronger now.
So he viciously attacks the bookshelves in an attempt to subdue the monster inside.
She had always been the worst secret keeper, but it had never bothered her as much as it does now. She shouldn't have said anything. Well, she didn't exactly say anything, but she shouldn't have brought it up. Now he has is Evil Vampire look on and she's starting to get scared. The turmoil of emotion spinning inside of her is making her nauseous.
So she just closes her eyes in a childish impulse, and wishes for all of it to go away.
Once upon a time, a girl named Caroline Forbes died. And when she did, a new world opened to her. A world of pain, terror and endless possibilities. But in this new world, she found Stefan. Or better he found her, when she was lost and scared, he taught her how to get back the control of her life.
Better than a knight in shining armor, he was a true friend.
And now her friend was hurting, because of her. She had never seen him so hurt, and frankly it's frightening. But it's not a reason to act like a child. He's her friend and he needs her help and sitting here feeling bad for him just won't do. She can do it. She's a vampire now, and she's Caroline freaking Forbes!
She will not let him self-destruct, she'll give him all the comfort he needs, she thinks placing herself between him and the furniture he's destroying.
He stops but doesn't look at her, eyes on the ground. She can still see the rage and pain in them, that she knows is there.
"Stefan, Stefan talk to me," she says.
"I want to kill."
She swallows hard. She saw it earlier, when they got cornered by Tyler and his pack. Now it's worse. She can hear the Ripper in his voice. And it's all her fault.
"Well," she licks her lips, nervous to be caught between the Ripper and the wall, "as your sober coach you know I won't let that happen."
She tries a small smile, she finds him unresponsive but at least non-threatening.
"We should try to get you focused on something else. We could get drunk, or keep on destroying every piece of furniture in this house. Or go for a run. Anything."
She wants to ask what would Lexi do, but she's not Lexi and she will never replace her. She needs to find her own way to help him.
He finally lifts his eyes from the ground and meets hers. She hope he can see determination and confidence in them. And Love. She wants him to see everything she feels, how much, how bad she wants to help him and make it better.
"We could go and break stuff in Damon's room," she suggests, trying hard to sound casual. She really hopes he'll be tempted.
He doesn't say anything but he does kinda nod. She takes it as a 'hell yes'.
But once in Damon room the sight of this stupid bed is too much to bear for Stefan.
"Never mind," she says, "I'll trash it for you later. Let's go get some whiskey."
They're both drunk and stupid, they've raided Damon's never-ending stash of Bourbon and Stefan is finally starting to open up.
"I know it's stupid and unfair," he's saying, "but I can't stand the idea of the two of them together. Not like that, not so soon. And I know, I know, it's unfair and Damon had to see us together for so long, but it's different. We were together first. And I—I just can't stand the idea of them together. Like that. In my house. Just days after-" his voice breaks on the last words.
She's never seen him like this.
"I'm so sorry," she says. "I shouldn't have, I'm so sorry Stefan."
She takes his hand, looking intently in his eyes, she wants him to see, she wants him to understand how much she hurts for him.
"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have said anything, and I shouldn't have gotten you upstairs. You know. I'm sorry. You've been there for me when I needed it the most, and I want you to know that I'll be there for you. I mean it. No matter what, I'm here."
She squeezes his hand, anxious for him to understand.
"Talk to me," she says.
This injunction didn't work earlier, and as soon as she says it she worries he'll draw back.
"I'm just—I'm stupid, aren't I?"
"No don't say that!"
He continues as if he didn't hear her. "Blaming Damon, being mad, acting like I'm any better than he is. How does he call it again? Self-righteous? Who cares. The point is, I'm not. I'm not better than him. I never was, and I'm probably not better for Elena either."
"How can you even say that? Do you even remember what Damon did to me? Did you forget about the part where you were the one who saved me too? Because if that doesn't make you a better human being, or vampire being, whatever, than him I don't know what does."
"I didn't forget Caroline, I'll never forget what he did to you, and I understand why you hate him the way you do. But you don't understand. The things I've done, the people I've killed..."
"Stefan, if this is about the Ripper, it isn't you."
"But it is me. I'm the one who has done all those horrible things and who has to live with them."
"Even then it proves that you're more of a man than Damon: you face your mistakes no matter how excruciatingly painful it is. Damon never did, he just turns it off. Who do you think is the better man?" she finishes in a strangled voice and he notices too late that she's crying.
"Caroline," he starts hesitantly, not sure what to say or how the roles have changed.
"Don't, I'm fine, I'm just being stupid. But not as much as you. How can you even compare yourself with Damon? How can you think that you're worse than he is? Remember what you said, about what makes us any different from Klaus? We've all done bad thing, that's true. But you're a good person Stefan. And no matter your mistakes, you haven't gave up. You're still trying to be better, to make up for what you did. So yeah, I make fun of you a lot for how serious, and intense it can make you-"
"And boring," he adds.
He gives her a pointed look, but a smile is tugging at the corner of his mouth.
"OK, maybe I said that too. The point is, Stefan, this is what makes you epic. This is what I love about you. Never think you're a lesser man than Damon."
"You really think that about me?" he asks almost shyly.
"Of course, I do."
She smiles sweetly at him and he grins.
"What about the part when you said you love me? Did you mean that too?"
This is silly, but I just always wanted to end a fic with Caroline saying this. Isn't that every girl's dream? No, really? OK, maybe it's juste me. Anyway, hope you enjoyed it. Review and let me know?