**This is my first fanfic, tell me what you love, what you hate, whatever falls between, but please review!**
Rated M for language, sexual themes, violence, and rape and torture. This story contains no explicit sex. All rape and torture content comes in the form of memories and dialog of past trauma.
*This story is written in Patricia Briggs' Alpha and Omega universe and is solely for entertainment purposes. I have the highest respect for Patricia Briggs and her writing and hope that this story compliments her work. I make no money from this work. Enjoy!
The girl opened her eyes and stared up at the stars and the moon through the trees. She was so weak, and her whole body hurt, but these were not new sensations for her. She tasted blood in her mouth – that was not new either. Her greatest sense was freedom. She wasn't sure if she was going to die or not, though she suspected that she would. She wasn't upset by that. She hoped that death would be a relief. She'd heard people speak of an afterlife – she'd read about it in books – but she hoped they were wrong. She didn't want to live anymore. Life was painful and she was so tired.
She felt the knife in her pocket. It hadn't been made for killing – part of her last master's silver service – but it was sharp and she knew that it would do the job. She'd taken it from her master's kitchen, though at the time she hadn't known what she would do with it. She'd wanted to kill her master, but she'd rarely met a person that she hadn't wanted to kill. Still, she'd never expected that she'd really do it. Killing frightened her – at least, the thought of it coming by her hand frightened her. She wasn't sure that she'd ever fully understood the logic in that. She'd seen a lot of people die. Most of her masters had killed often in her presence. Somehow, she felt that if she killed, it would make her like them. She didn't like what she was, but she knew that she wasn't like them. They were monsters. She didn't want to be a monster.
Still, something had changed in her recently. There was something about her last master that had come so close to pushing her over the line she had never dreamed to cross. She still didn't understand what it had been, but it had made her take the knife.
Tonight had been different than other nights though. She hadn't just been raped. She hadn't merely been beaten. Maybe he'd decided that he was done with her and either assumed that he couldn't sell her or simply didn't need the money. Either way, she'd known almost from the start that she wouldn't survive when she'd felt his hands on her. They'd been… eager and malicious – more so than normal. She'd had the knife within easy reach then, but she hadn't chosen to use it. She welcomed death, and – with the promise of the end so near – she wouldn't let herself die as one of them.
He'd stopped sooner than she'd anticipated though. He'd been using a knife to make her bleed – her face, her arms, her breasts, almost her entire body – and he'd cut too deeply into her stomach. She'd thought that the end was near then, but his body had changed. His tension changed from arousal to… It was something that she had rarely seen, and nothing she'd ever seen in relation to her. She thought that he was disgusted, with himself maybe. He hadn't been a killer after all – at least not the sort to do the deed personally.
She was sure that he'd thought her wounds mortal, or it was unlikely that he would have left her here. She thought he was right. She was getting weaker. Most of her cuts weren't deep, and she wasn't sure if the single deep cut in her stomach had hit anything vital, but there were a lot of cuts. She was losing a lot of blood.
She smiled slightly – it hurt, but pain didn't bother her – she would die, she thought. Finally.
So she just watched the stars as they winked in and out through the gently waving screen of the trees above her head. The moon was a fat ball, just a sliver short of perfectly round, almost directly overhead. She'd always liked the night – late night, after even monsters had sated their lust and sought sleep. The time was peaceful. Most of her masters had put little stock in mornings, particularly where she was concerned, so she'd mostly been free to spend her nights awake. She didn't care to be awake when there were monsters about. But when they slept, she was free. Free to be herself. Free to think and to dream. Her dreams had not been anything extravagant, of course, for she was no fool to think a knight in shining armor would rescue her and give her a life of happiness as she'd read once in a child's story. No, her dreams were only just out of her grasp, though she'd never expected to actually close that distance.
Mostly, she'd dreamed of peace, if only for a little while. That, she had found. How wonderful it was to think that she would die during her favorite time of the night, all alone… peaceful. She'd never expected to be so lucky.
Her vision was becoming blurry, and she despaired at the loss of her perfect view but she didn't fight it. She knew that the end was near now. The pain in her body was almost completely gone. If she'd had the strength, she thought she'd have laughed with the joy of such a merciful death at the end of such a life as hers. It seemed a greater justice than she'd ever have dreamed.
Her eyes fluttered closed and she felt herself begin to drift.
But then a sound alerted her that she was not alone and a lifetime of wariness for the presence of others brought back senses that she had thought beyond her grasp. Her eyes opened and her vision was clearer than it had been. The sound was not loud, but it was close. She tilted her head toward it slightly, sliding the knife into a tight grip. She did not want to die a killer, but she would before she would allow herself to be taken again. She was too close to death. She'd already welcomed it and let herself believe that it was over. If her greatest wound was blood loss, she might yet be revived at a hospital. She could not allow that. She refused to have her peace stolen from her now.
At first, she saw nothing. The moon was full and bright, but the trees were thicker than they looked from her position, and little filtered to the ground. Also, she noticed finally, she'd been looking too high. She'd expected a person, a man. When the movement finally drew her eye, she saw instead, a huge black dog, or… No. It must be a wolf. It looked huge to her, but then she was lying on the ground, and she knew very little about wolves except that they were dangerous.
Dread filled her, but the realist in her wasn't really surprised. She'd known that a peaceful end was more than was meant for her. Her life had never included peace, luck, or mercy. Why should the end of it be any different?
The huge animal came closer slowly, warily. Wolf or dog, she knew that hungry posture. It was looking at food, food that it wasn't sure if it would have to kill first.
She made a decision then that would have shocked her if she'd been more coherent. For the first time since she'd left her mother, she felt the instinct to fight and did not challenge it. She assumed that she would not get her peaceful end, as her little steak knife was surely nothing against this beast, but she'd decided that she would not die in the agony of being eaten alive. She would fight and force the beast to kill her before it got its dinner.
Somehow it seemed so much more appropriate that she would die this way. After years of being brutalized by bestial men, she would die at the hands of a true beast.
It approached… and she waited, holding the knife at her side. She tightened her grip and the wolf's head jerked toward her hand. It lunged at her with terrible speed, teeth bared.
With strength that she knew she shouldn't have possessed in her state, she responded to a survival instinct that she hadn't felt in years. Her whole body tensed and agony ripped through her tortured frame – agony that she ignored. The wolf struck before she brought her knife up – it was faster than she'd imagined even a wild predator could be – and she felt teeth sink into her throat. She knew that it was over now, but her survival instinct didn't.
Despite the teeth in her tender flesh that would surely prove fatal in moments, she continued to lift her knife and she forced it into the wolf's ear until her fist touched its fur. She collapsed – that last amazing reserve of energy and her newest wound pushing her beyond the ability to even hold the knife – and the wolf rolled off of her, landing at her side. The heat of its unmoving body radiated into her and she felt that powerful sense of satisfaction that she hadn't known since that fateful day so long ago.
She was too exhausted to feel regret for that satisfaction this time though. The moon filled her eyes for one indeterminable moment, and then blessed darkness came.
More to come...
I hope that you enjoyed and would welcome any reviews and/or suggestions.