Everyday was the same for me.
Go to school, go to work, and go home to an empty house.
That has been my life since I turned the age of 16. I am now currently 17 and in a few days I would be a legal adult, yet no one to celebrate it with. Maybe I should get a dog or a cat...ya that'll end well.
Everyday I try to be normal and socialize, and that works with a few people, but I think a lot of people see through my mask. I'm sad and lonely. That's the basics, everyday I am sad and lonely, but I have to put on a happy face and push through. It was my last year at Ouran Acadamy and I'll be damned to let them beat me. Everyday to blend in I straighten my dyed brown hair and put in dark brown contacts to hide my... abnormality.
Walking into class 3-A I kept my head level and made eye contact with some people and nodded my head. Truthfully no matter how many times I do this a day I am still shaking inside and out. People scare the shit out of me. People are mysterious and hurtful beings. All they do is hurt each other. They get pleasure out of it. I shook my head of the dreadful thoughts and sat in my seat, right back corner, right next to the window. Classic right?
"Nice to see you back Ms. Song." Mr. Harrison said smiling down at me and walked away a second later.
Yesterday I had to stay home. Eric, my now ex-boyfriend had stopped by right before I was going to leave for school, and he broke up with me because he found another girl. I wasn't sad or anything, I was actually relieved, but that was before he decided to beat me to a pulp, and so since it took me a long while to get up after that I just didn't come to school. Most everyone didn't notice that I was missing.
My name is Lya (Lie-uh) but my last name is not Song. I got the name Song from one of my favorite shows, but since I moved here I can only watch it on my computer. Doctor Who. My actual last name is McSweeny. I had just found that out when I turned 14 and I moved into my grandparents home. At 16 I moved out because I didn't want to cause them trouble. They were the first people who hadn't hit me at all. On the contrary, my grandfather is strong and brave and very kind to me, it's the same with my grandmother. My grandfather is a very amazing man though, him, his father, his father, and maybe even my father are all swindlers (Sweeny Swindler lol). He wants me to become the first woman in the family to become a thief. I don't think I could do that though, I am not really a bad person.
I stared out the window and saw the bright blue sky smiling back at me. I loved when it was warm out. I heard a bag drop on the desk next to me. Without looking up I knew who it was without looking up because we sat by each other ever since I came here in my first year. Takashi Morinozuka and his cousin, Mitsukini Haninozuka, sat in front of him, still a little tired from just waking up. They were an odd couple, cousins but looked nothing alike, complete opposites, yet best friends. Very strange.
As the day flew by I continuously stared out the window and listened to my music. I could never focus in class no matter how hard I tried. I was just so sore if I tried to concentrate on work I would feel something start to hurt, or because I grabbed the wrong contacts, so everything is blurry. This day just gets better and better. With the last class of the day out of the way, the teachers had just given up like every other day. I mean who is gonna want to learn the last half an hour of the day, besides me. Call me weird but I actually like learning new things, history or science, math or literature, everything is a new thing to learn.
All the girls surrounded the Host Club boys and the other boys fit into their little circle by themselves. Then there's me. Alone. Great. Man I am so depressing, no wonder no one wants to be around me. I really need a pet or a friend, again. Hearing all their gaggling and swooning kinda made me a little wary, so I scooted my desk more toward the window.
"Song-san?" A child-like voice questioned.
I looked over at the desk and saw Haninozuka-kun looking at me with curiosity in his eyes. Such wonder and purity in a guy that is older than me, I lost that at a young age. I knew what was coming, he asked it everyday.
"Are you coming to the Host Club today?" Haninozuka-san asked gently.
The fake smile never left my face as I repeated what I said each day I asked. I had it memorized.
"I'm sorry, I wish I could but today I have stuff to do." I tried to sound appologetic, but I think I failed.
His face dropped and he nodded his head and turned away, like everyday. Like everyday a little pang went through my heart. Guilt. Was I a bad person? So what if I didn't want to get hurt? So what if I can'tbe truely happy?
I can't be hurt..